Well, Mrs. Myron, I think for one thing, the OP asked specifically about those people who have chosen to avoid marriage. So a good number of happily married Dopers (and there are plenty) probably just avoided the thread.
In addition, I’d say that happy marriages among regular folks are like happy marriages among celebrities–honey, they don’t make the Enquirer!!!
Thirdly, I think a good number of people who (for whatever reason) are not married have been put on the defensive by the endless (and judgmental) comments made by friends and family about NOT being married. So for those of us who are unmarried by choice (or who have not ruled out marriage, but are certainly happy being single), this thread became a place to find some kindred spirits and commiserate a little.
I have to say that I am indeed, a very fortunate man to have found someone like Lola to share my life with. I cannot believe I went what is probably a third of my life without knowing the person I plan to spend the rest of my days with. the days that passed before meeting her seem to be a waste but perhaps those were the days I was learning what I needed to know to keep one such as wonderful as she.
It’s simple, we are not bound by paper, tradition, or convention but by love and undying committment to one another.
Would a state sanctioned ceremony strengthen what we have? I think not. It might satisfy those of you that beg for proof but our proof lies elsewhere.
Marriage is only one way for a couple to demonstrate their commitment to one another, we simply choose to demonstrate our love for each other by choosing to stay together, day in and day out… no matter what fate brings us.
Seven years, isn’t this where I am supposed to start itching?
The only itch I have is to go and join my beloved on the couch so that we can cuddle up, watch a little television and tell each other about our respective days.
Every one of my days should start and end with me holding Lola in my arms… those days when I can’t do this are, thankfully, few and far between.
And who else would stand behind me and correct my grammar?
So you naysayers can talk to me all you want about us being committmentphobes or that I am getting my milk for free or is that Lola getting her milk for free?
Anyways… I’ll keep letting her touch my flesh in an unvirtuous way for as long as she likes.
I’m very much the marrying type (on my second marriage now), so this thread ain’t for me. Just wanted to say that it reminded me of a lesbian friend I once had. She was slight and skinny, but gruff and butch. She had the other basement apartment in the building where my first wife & I lived.
Every single time, must have been at least a dozen times, when I partied with my lesbian neighbor, she always said “Your girlfriend…” I always corrected her: “My wife.” After a while, she was like, “Oh yeah, your wife,” but she still kept calling her my “girlfriend.” I mean, the whole concept of marriage was so totally alien to her reality that her mind simply could not think of people in that way.
