I care about their fucking cats.
I post about my cats, my children and my grandchildren. I’m your worst nightmare.
Ooh, you know what? Jon Stewart just broke this story wide open a few days ago. Apparantly some guy in … South or North Carolina … around there, anyway he’s been arrested for letting several dozen dogs out of the local kennel. So it was him.
You’re wrong. It was on the SNL News. I believe Tina Fey had the story.
I care
Poll:
Who cares about cats?
Who cares about j_kat_251?
I do.
I believe one of these complaints might be a dig at a thread that I started.
Well sir, I’ll have you know, that you’re fucking correct. It was in fact the sappiest motherfucking thread I’ve ever started, and I deserve nothing but your disdain and approbation.
I entirely fucking agree with you.
And the cruel jackboot of Coldfire cruelly stamped down and killed my barely-breathing thread before it could get any more fucking sappy.
Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I shall attempt not be such a pathetic simpering bastard ever again.
What does your cat think about the war?
My cat’s breath smells like cat food.
Hey, j_kat_251,
My cat hates you.
My cat just does the neatest things, but thanks to feline discriminators like j_kat_251 it is no longer safe to discuss them in public or on the internet.
[chant] Hey Hey, Hey Ho, the kitty oppression has got to go! [/chant]
I have to say that I also hate cat threads, I may have this wrong but they just seem to be one upmanship about who has the weirdest cat.
Its like the OP will be something like " Hey my cat just loves macaroni, can’t get enough of the stuff. How weird (but also delightfully cute and eccentric) is that?
Then the next post will be " Oh yeah? Well my cat likes to sit in a darkened room for days at a time just gently rocking and occasionally writing stuff on the wall about Satan with his own shit"
3rd post " My cat used to be a highly thought of stand-up comedian, but since he got his own chat-show there has been a lot of talk about how he has sold out and stuff, and it has put him right off his cigarettes"
And I can just imagine the other cat-owner-would-be-posters just looking at their cats, getting ready to type and saying to the cat
" C’mon you son of a bitch, do something eccentric and cute instead of just doing normal type things, normally I would post about how my cat is convinced he is a dog but these other poster have already topped that, hmmmn maybe if I smoke a joint I can make myself believe that you have an avid interest in the Napolionic wars or something"
I have a dog, he is greedy, medium sized and cute.What else do you need to know?
You just had to get your dog in, eh?
Ickle wickle doggie’s so gweedy, but he’s a lovwy medium-sized cutey wooty. Ahhhhhh.
You simpering dog-lovers make me puke.
I love my cats.
But they’re all dead, now.
Then maybe they would have liked this poem.
You come out spitting vitriol against cat people and then you back off from it?! What a lame rant. If you’re going to piss off catomaniacs, then stick to your guns.
This thread doesn’t deserve the Pit… send it to IMHO or Great Debates. Unless we get full mental breakdown or hysteric rejoinders with Hitleresque metaphors, this thread should be closed.
War.
If your lap wasn’t the warmest thing in the room, little Mr. Snuggles wouldn’t have anything to do with you, you co-dependent, kitty-slapped, pussy-whipped, whisker worshipper!
That would be in Charleston, South Carolina. At the SPCA just a few scant miles from where I live. I had no idea it made SNL. That’s crazy.
Oh, and j_kat, my cats Benvolio The Lardbutt and Gomez the SuperSpaz think you’re a nice person… FOR THEM TO POOP ON!
Don’t piss off my cat. I mean it. I won’t take responsibility for what he does when he reads this rant. This is in black and white, so I’m protected against the law.
Then again, he’ll probably just roll over, purr, and lick my face.
Ava
Well, I tend to agree with the OP.
I also do not care about anyone’s fucking cats. I much prefer dogs to cats. Also, am allergic to cats.
However, I am grateful that the cat-people tend to label their threads appropriately, so with my superior intellect, I am able to avoid reading about your goddamn stupid obnoxious sneeze-inducing animals.