North Pole man kills wife

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I saw that headline in the Anchorage Daily News in the early 90s. A man from North Pole, AK killed his wife and stashed the body under the trailer.

Not being from Alaska, I immediately associated North Pole man with Santa Claus. To me, the headline said Santa Claus kills wife. I thought the headline was funny, in a dark humor kind of way, and pointed it out to the people I worked with. All of them immediately said “North Pole. That’s that town outside of Fairbanks.” I had to call a friend in Florida before someone got the joke.

I was reminded of this because I saw a filler clip about North Pole, Alaska on some documentary. Because I still think the headline was funny, I told my wife (born in Alaska, but she’s been in Nebraska for the past several years) about it. Even after all this time, she couldn’t see the whole North Pole man = Santa Claus bit. She was stuck on North Pole = Town outside of Fairbanks.

So, I’m telling all of you. In the early 90s, Santa Claus killed Mrs. Claus and buried her under the trailer.

2

If it helps, my first thought on seeing your thread title was, in fact, “Mrs. Claus! Oh no!”

:smiley:

3

That makes me wonder if the sleigh was used in the murder. Maybe it was the getaway vehicle?

Tripler
Fuck it. Bring Rudolph and Dasher in for questioning immediately.

4

C’mon – North Pole isn’t in Alaska, it’s between Lake Placid and Wilmington in the Adirondacks: http://www.northpoleny.com/

And you’re near the stomping grounds of clayton_e, and only about an hour from Montreal.

5

Naw, the North Pole is in Colorado halfway up the road to Pike’s Peep where all them vouyers hang out.

Course a blizzard took the trailer back in '64.

6

Rudolph is wanted on a DUI anyway!

And after LOTR, it seems evident what this Claus guy was up to with those elves all these years! :eek:

7

I know where North Pole, Alaska is (thats where the first McDonalds is for many miles) and I chuckled at the absurbity of the headline. Sounds like the Alaska Daily News’ sense of humor.

Was talking to an old guy at work the other day whose from North Pole. One winter he was in New York and worked at Macy’s as a Santa Claus. He said they freaked when he showed them his Alaska DL and it said he was from North Pole, AK! And he has white hair and fits the part well. HoHoHo!

8

Coming in from Delta Junction yeah, coming in from Fairbanks, no. North Pole is only about 15 minutes or so (well, the way I drive :D) and kind of east of Fairbanks, but about an hour or so from Delta Junction which is SE of Fairbanks.

Was the guy you knew one of the actual North Pole santas? I haven’t been to the Santa Claus house since I was a kid, but I drive by there for work when I’m on Delta Junction duty for our company, IIRC, they have several of those white-haired and bearded guys who play santa.

9

I’m in Valdezees so I usually go up the Richardson to Frbks. I took my daughter to Santa Claus land back in the early 80’s.

I was talking to the guy in the smoke shack for a short time and he didn’t mentioned if he ever was a real North Pole santa. He said he was visiting his son in New York when he worked at Macys.

You come to visit Ft. Greely or Pogo? Ever been to HAARP?

10

And we all know that H postal codes are in Montreal, such as H0H 0H0.

11

I bet they let him off on a “Sanity Clause”. :smiley:

12

When asked why he killed her, Santa told reporters “She was a stone-cold bitch.”

13

He just got tired of being pestered for sex. We all know that Santa cums but once a year. :wink:

14

That’s the North Pole the title suggested to me.

15

I got it.
I have used a Groucho Marx throw away line for years and no one has ever gotten it.

It goes something like this:

What is your favorite song?

Montreal.

Montreal?

Yeah, I’m a dreamer. Montreal.

16

Uh, care sharing it with the rest of us? Unless it’s along the lines of “I’m a dreamer, aren’t we all?”, in which case I got it but am underwhelmed.

17

I think that’s it. I didn’t get that one for years either, and I think my mom was clueless as well. In fact I think it was my brother who finally figured it out. It’s not that funny, but we were glad there was finally an explanation for the joke. I’m very interested to see if Shirley has the same explanation.

18

Yeah, that is it. It is just a subtle little nudge. Not a knee slapper.

19

Poly,
When I was a kid, a was under the impression that it was the real North Pole. :smack:

Santa’s Workshop was fun. Every kid who goes there has a picture of themselves standing next to the giant “North Pole” made of ice. I can’t wait to take my kids there. I guess I should start working on having kids first. :wink:

20

I thought it was about some guy in Gdansk. Go figure.