"Not Being Mean, But...."

Why do people feel a need to use this as a disclaimer just before saying something “mean” to someone else???

I am so tired of disclaimers such as, “God love him/her but…” or “He/She’s just as sweet as the day is long, but…”

Screw that! Just say it, Dude!

Just think of the second more of life you’d get, if you didn’t bother to try to cover yourself!

Just say it, and don’t worry about the “heavenly disclaimers” ! Chances are they won’t count anyway.

This isn’t meant at anyone in particular. Just something that’s been bothering me for a while, and I needed to get it out in the open.



Yeah, and it’s a completely bogus disclaimer, if you think about it. It allows the speaker license (at least they believe it does) to slip in something snotty or ungenerous about the subject in question, the implication being, “I’m a really great person and not given to uncharitable thoughts such as these”!


It’s because of your location. I think Yankees don’t bother with it and are just mean. :slight_smile:

Obviously “bless her heart” negates any bad karma coming from the incredibly cruel thing you just said about her.

I thought that “bless her heart” was code for “saying bless her heart hereby negates any good I might have said/thought about her.”
“She means well, bless her heart.” Ring! Clue phone! Speaker means that speaker does not think that person referred to means well at all.
I hope this clears things up.

Well, Quasimodem is being a real shit today … God bless him. :smiley:

I think it’s more often used to (supposedly) soften the blow, at least in the south. As in: “She doesn’t have the sense God gave a mule, Bless her heart.” It allows one to say any nasty thing one wants and still appear polite.

Exactly. That is what I said.

Think about it.

I just think it’s an attempt to reverse a negative comment, while you said it’s to “negate any good I might have said/thought about her”. Minor difference, both are probably correct.

No, but I sure do love you little shits! :smiley:

And I say that without a disclaimer of any kind.

Y’all have been a lifeline to me since I signed on, and I know to treasure that.

I know that I am not as articulate or as smart as y’all, but the Dope (and y’all) have been a very nice refuge to come to when I am not holding it together like I oughtta, and I just wanted to say “thank you” for that.

It’s just great to know that y’all are there, and let’s not waste any words, okay?

If I am being an asshole, then just say “Quasi’s being an asshole”, and not “Bless his heart, he’s being an asshole!”

That’s it, except for telling y’all that I love being here, and I appreciate all the help I have gotten to fight my own ignorance!


I am merely pointing out the more subtle uses of the phrase. Consider it a brief glimpse into another world. The chance that it may have been used in the sense that I posited should not be dismissed, ever.

Heh. Bless your heart.

(kidding! :smiley: ).