Donnie DarkKnight:
Troubled teen goes back in time and becomes a costumed vigilante.
**Emo Williams: The Adventure Begins **- A branch of the government recruits a "Generation Y " man to become an assassin. The plan falls apart when the man realizes that life is not a video game and there are no reset buttons or pause keys.
Rated E for Emo and Epic Fail.
Diamonds Are For Several Million Years - Russian agents inject James Bond with sodium pentathol and learn all Britain’s state secrets and various other minutiae.
**Dawn of the Dude: ** The walking dead break into Jeff Lebowski’s apartment and pee on his rug.
I almost drooled on my keyboard.
BitMan - A nerdy, wealthy billionaire by day (cough Bill Gates cough), costumed vigilante by night, seeks to rid the world of viruses (and his competiton), both digital and physical.
The Girl with the Dragging Tattoo: A young woman’s body art starts sagging as she ages.
Dead Clam: a psychotic giant mollusk terrorizes a young couple on their boat.
David Letterman: So, there was a movie opening this week, what was it, Jonah Square, Jonah Pentagon…?
Paul Schaffer: Jonah Hex.
DL: Yeah, that was it. I guess if it’s only moderately successful, there might be some straight-to-DVD sequels. They probably won’t start Josh Brolin, though, and instead of that expensive face make-up, the guy’ll just wear a big Band-Aid.
- Late Show with David Letterman, 06/31/2010
How To Train Your Drag Queen: I suspect this title is already in use for real…
Finding Emo:
Bella goes searching for Edward.
Beatrix Potter and the Fluffy Bunny:
“Bea watched in horror as Peter advanced upon her, his fangs dripping with blood.”
Beatrix Potter and Brown Bunny: Bea watched in horror as the Peter advanced upon her, its slit dripping with pre-cum . . .
Independence War Day of the Worlds: an extraterrestrial invasion is defeated by a virus.
Snacks on a Plane: When the in-flight snacks turn out to be as inedible as the entrees, passengers revolt. “I want these *&@ing peanuts off this #&@ing plane!”
Dependence Day:
After being defeated the aliens fly back home to live with their parents.
Conception: A man who can enter people’s dreams uses his power to impregnate women, leading to a rash of “virgin births”
Fantastic Vonage: A scifi flick about doctors shrinking themselves down to microscopic size is ruined by all the phone service product placement.
The Day the War of the Worlds Stood Still: A scheduling slip-up causes Klaatu and the Martians to arrive on the same day. The tripods won’t start up but it doesn’t really matter since Gort just zaps them anyway.
12 Monkees: A convict is sent to the past to stop a serial killer from auditioning for a sitcom based around a fake band.
Airbiscuit: the story of the gassiest horse to ever take to the track.
12 Monkees:
A horrific apocalypse occurs after The Monkees are cloned twice.