Not going to lie, this long-dead spider is fully hard right now.

And I’m not just talking about his body.

I’m finding it very hard to give a witty, clever, or funny retort to this story, it’s just to easy. It gives you an opening to make a joke on a silver platter.

I saw this story this morning and my first thought was “Finally, a news event worth reporting about! Now this is news.”

Too easy. No way I’m walking the spider dick trail.

Technically, although arthropods, “harvestmen” = “Daddy Long Legs” are not spiders.

But that IS an erect penis.
Apparently spiders, like other animals (including people) can have erections after death, when it seems pretty superfluous.

You joke about “rock-hard” goes here.

“If your erection lasts 99 million years, don’t bother calling your doctor.”

“Hung like a harvestman”.

Insult? Brag?

I read Dr Steven Novella’s blog, Neurologica. He has written often about science reporting in popular literature and how if there is any way to work “penis” or any other base topic into a science report it happens. :smiley:

“…harvestmen like H. grimaldii have honest-to-goodness penises, which they insert into genital openings next to the females’ mouthparts.”

How convenient!

That fella has nothing to be ashamed of.

“Honest, honey, I missed!”

Now SEE…this is how you do it. You put the playground next to the water park, not the sewer plant.

Ask him if Amber has a sister.

This ain’t just a roll of quarters. Come to daddy, baby!

I’ve heard that hair, nails, and harvestmen’s penises keep growing after death.

Itsy, bitsy…oh, never mind.

They don’t call him him 9-legged Pete for nuthin.

If those guys in “Jurassic Park” ever get hold of this we’re all in trouble.

Nice waterspout!

You know, there WAS a movie called… .

I don’t have any formal training, but I’m pretty sure that’s not his ass.

He died with his boots on…all eight of them.

You ate correct, although where I’m from daddy long legs DOES refer to a spider. In some bizarro places it means crane fly.