Other guests might not know whether you are invited, and are just trying to not get involved.
But your only option at this point is to have someone else discreetly make an inquiry if you were meant to be invited. Don’t go unless you receive a direct invitation from the couple or their parents.
How dont I sound like a close friend they would feel bad about leaving out? And how are other people aware Im not invited?
How would the guests I am asking what time it is know Im not invited?
Because you weren’t invited, and no one is talking to you about the wedding. It’s obvious. It’s so obvious that I know it even though I’m a classless lout. I told you your only option. There are no others.
why do you say that? You think they were lying to me to avoid giving information to someone not invited? And again, how are others aware Im not invited?
Perhaps the wedding party discussed with all of the guests, “And don’t let jashley know when and where the wedding is. You know how he/she gets. We prefer not to have him/her there.”
The assumption is that Mgalindo13 and others believe they are avoiding engaging you on the topic by feigning ignorance of the time.
How close are you to this friend?
If you have talked to either of the couple about their engagement and they have shared with you excitement about getting married, then I think you can at least be confident that you have reached “close acquantaince” status.
If this hasn’t happened, then you probably aren’t a close enough friend. It’s not that you are being intentionally shunned. It’s just that your name didn’t come up in their memory banks. And just because you know the invitees just as well as you know the bride and groom doesn’t mean you know how close THEY are. Social networks can be pretty convoluted and hard to read at first glance.
There are other ways besides attending the wedding to bid a couple well wishes.
Keep in mind that when a wedding is held in a park, the couple often have to pay a fee to the park and that fee will be based on the size of the crowd. So they couldn’t just invite everyone.
You seem to have difficulty with social skills. They’re probably talking about you behind your back.
They may be figuring that if you’re asking what time the wedding is, you must not have gotten an invitation, since the time is (almost certainly) printed on the invitations.
How do the people not talking to me about the wedding know I wasnt invited?
They probably heard about it directly or indirectly from the bride and/or groom. Why do you think everybody developed selective amnesia about the time?
I think it’s pretty obvious from reading this thread why they don’t want you there.
How do I seem to have difficulty with social skills? Why would they be talking about me behind my back?
So theyre talking about me behind my back going around saying “jashleys not invited”?
Obvious from reading this thread how?
Look, if you need to hear for sure, call up the bride or groom and point-blank ask, “Am I invited to your wedding?” If the answer is no, do not pursue it further. Don’t even ask, “Why not?”
If you were invited you would have, barring some sort of accident, gotten an invitation, and wouldn’t have to ask people questions like when and where it is. That’s how people know (or at least have reason to think) you weren’t invited.
And having not been invited, it would inappropriate for you to show up. Send them a card and let it go.
If the ceremony is fairly soon and if “everybody” knows the location and date but nobody seems to know the time, then it certainly appears that you aren’t meant to know, i.e. you aren’t invited. If it is six months from now then it might conceivably be the case that plans simply haven’t been firmed up yet. If it is six days from now and everyone seems to have amnesia, then sorry, find a movie to go to or something; you really aren’t invited and word has gone around to that effect. Why is that obvious (to answer some of your other replies)? Because you yourself said that everyone is telling you the same thing. You wouldn’t be getting the same answer from everyone (again, assuming the ceremony is soon) if there wasn’t collusion.
I was a spectator to this sort of thing for a friend’s wedding. A mutual acquaintance called me to tell me that she’d be staying at my house when she came to town for the wedding (I hadn’t invited her to do so, so I wasn’t in the most positive of moods), but took the opportunity to ask me where and when the wedding was. I told her that I didn’t know the details, but that I’d pass on her contact details to the couple in case they’d lost them.
This essentially obliged the bride to call the acquaintance and tell her specifically that she wasn’t invited. Yes, it was a park wedding with essentially unlimited space. No, she wouldn’t be welcome to show up anyway.
Don’t put yourself in that position. Work on the basis that although you thought you were wedding-invitation-friends with the couple, they’ve just told you that you aren’t in the most polite way possible. Pushing it further will oblige them to tell you in a less-polite manner.
Their behavior indicates they they don’t want you to know. Its impossible that everyone just “forgot” what time the wedding is. If any particular person had actually forgotten but was willing to tell you, they would say something like “its in the morning, 9 or 10 or something? I’ll check.”
Your failure to recognize this, either natively or when others point it out, indicates a lack of social skills.