not leaving a #

[Prose]

I hate, absolutely drives me NUTS when someone does not leave a # where I can reach them on my vm, especially when they know that I do not have their #.
Why do people do that?
grrrrrr…who am I supposed to contact you if you don’t leave a #??!

Does this happen to anyone else?
or am I the only one it happens to, and does anyone else get so pissed about it?

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I am a fire whose flames lick and spit at the boundless sky forever desiring wonderous consummation
-me

[Mullinator]

And it is even worse when they are stupid, shiftless Americans who haven’t made any dent on pop culture. Oh, that irks me.

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Have you voted for your favorite, huggable Mullinator today?

[Arnold_Winkelried]

Prose, when that happens, just open the phonebook, put your finger on a page at random, and dial that phone number. When someone answers, abuse them verbally and/or ask them about Prince Albert in a can.

Trust me, you’ll instantly feel better.

[Akatsukami]

Call my mother-in-law. When we get a hangup on our answering machine, it’s invariably her, as she hates talking to the damned things.

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“I don’t just want you to feel envy. I want you to suffer, I want you to bleed, I want you to die a little bit each day. And I want you to thank me for it.” – What “Let’s just be friends” really means

[Athena]

Sounds like you need Caller ID. No more lost or forgotten phone numbers!

[Poysyn]

More than that, I hate those “Hi, it’s me. Call me.” yeah, right, how many "me"s do I know? Grrrr

[BoBettie]

Remember the guy who did the old UPS ads? The fastest talking man in the world?
Well, he calls my voice mail regularly- he usually says:

"Hi! This is Joe…Ummmmmm I’ll be in the office- Then I’ll be home…ummmmm…duhhhhhhh…It’s about that work thing you wanted to discuss…ummmmmmmmm…duhhhhhhh…call me at [faster then the speed of light] 555-5555 or at home 555-5555 [/faster then the speed of light]

So now I have to REPLAY his ridiculously long and stupid message so I can hear the number. I usually have to do this several times. GRRRRR! Say your phone number slow!!!
By the way, I wonder what part of “leave a BRIEF message” people can’t seem to figure out? Hmmmmmmm.

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Love is like popsicles…you get too much you get too high.
Not enough and you’re gonna die…
Zettecity

[Eve]

I hate those “hi, it’s me” people! I can never recognize anyone’s voice on the phone, so when I call people, I’m always nice enough to immediately identify myself in case they have the same problem. But they always get bent outta shape when they go, “hi, it’s me” and I say, “who?”.

I had one friend who put on her message, “please leave your number even if you know I have it, because I frequently check my messages from outside, where I don’t have my phone book.” Maybe you can try that?

[WillGolfForFood]

What you folks need is a couple of kids. Then you get to hear the following at dinnertime: “Oh, dad, I forgot to tell you - somebody called you today. I forgot who he said he was, but he wanted you to call back real soon. It was some kind of emergency. Uh, no, I didn’t ask him what his number was - I just told him you’d call him right back.”

That’s about the time I have to be scraped from the ceiling.

[John_Corrado]

Will Golf- (BTW: is that short for William GolfForFood?)

LOL. Funny, that sounds exactly like a conversation between me and my father. “Oh, son, some girl called for you today. Said something about a movie.” Whereupon I list the name of every woman I know in the desperate hope that one of those names sounds familiar to my father. My favorite episode was when he said that “some kid” had called for me. Said kid turned out to be my 34-year old, married with a kid on the way, U.S. Army Major friend. Some kid.

Eventually, I told my friends that leaving a message with my father was equivalent to not having called me at all.

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JMCJ

This is not a sig.

[Johnny_L.A]

I think that if the person doesn’t leave the number, and it’s a person you don’t call often enough for them to believe that you remember the number, and you’ve told the person before that you have a bad habit of losing numbers, then he or she subconciously doesn’t want you to call back.

Actually, people who call me and don’t leave numbers are usually people I don’t want to talk to anyway… and they tend to be calling long-distance. Screw 'em. Let 'em call me back.

[AuntiePam]

I actually like it when someone doesn’t leave their number. Totally absolves me of any responsibility to call them back.

What irks me more are people who spend five minutes bitching about how hard it is to get ahold of me, rather than just getting to whatever it is they wanted in the first place. I usually cut them off with “Uh, did you want something?”

I hate the phone. The phone hates me.

[Lexicon]

Along the lines of Arnold Wink’s response, mayhap you should try this:

For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone!!! Don’t take that bad day out on someone you know, take it out on someone you DON’T know!!! Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, “Hello?” I politely said, “This is Patrick Hanifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?”

Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn’t believe that anyone could be that rude. I tracked down Robin’s correct number and called her. She had transposed the last two digits incorrectly. After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided to call it again.
When the same person once more answered, I yelled “You’re a jackass!” and hung up. Next to his phone number I wrote the word “jackass,” and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills, or had a really bad day, I’d call him up. He’d answer, and I’d yell,
“You’re a jackass!” It would always cheer me up.

Later in the year the phone company introduced caller ID. This was a real disappointment for me, I would have to stop calling the jackass. Then one day I had an idea. I dialed his number, then heard his voice, “Hello.” I made up a name. “Hi. This is the sales office of the telephone
company and I’m just calling to see if you’re familiar with our caller ID program?” He went, “No!” and slammed the phone down. I quickly called him back and said, “That’s because you’re a jackass!”
The reason I took the time to tell you this story, is to show you how if there’s ever anything really bothering you, you can do something about it.
Just dial 823-4863.

[Keep reading, it gets better.]

The old lady at the mall really took her time pulling out of the parking pace. I didn’t think she was ever going to leave. Finally, her car began to move and she started to very slowly back out of the slot. I backed up little more to give her plenty of room to pull out. Great, I thought, she’s finally
leaving. All of a sudden this black Camaro came flying up the parking isle in the wrong direction and pulls into her space.

I started honking my horn and yelling, “You can’t just do that, Buddy. I was here first!” The guy climbed out of his Camaro completely ignoring me. He walked toward the mall as if he didn’t even hear me. I thought to myself, this guy’s a jackass, there sure are a lot of jackasses in this world. I noticed he had a “For Sale” sign in the back window of his car. I wrote down the number. Then I hunted for another place to park.

A couple of days later, I’m at home sitting at my desk. I had just gotten off the phone after calling 823-4863 and yelling, “You’re a jackass!” (It’s really easy to call him now since I have his number on speed dial.) I noticed the phone number of the guy with the black Camaro lying on my desk and thought I’d better call this guy, too. After a couple rings someone answered the phone and said, “Hello.”
I said, “Is this the man with the
black Camaro for sale?”
“Yes, it is.”
“Can you tell me where I can see it?”
“Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th street. It’s a yellow house and the car’s parked right out front.”
I said, “What’s your name?”
“My name is Don Hansen.”
“When’s a good time to catch you, Don?”
“I’m home in the evenings.”
“Listen Don, can I tell you something?”
“Yes,”
“Don, you’re a jackass!” And I slammed the phone down.

After I hung up I added Don Hansen’s number to my speed dialer. For a while things seemed to be going better for me. Now when I had a problem I had two jackasses to call. Then, after several months of calling the jackasses and hanging up on them, it just wasn’t as enjoyable as it used to be. I gave the problem some serious thought and came up with a solution:
First, I had my phone dial Jackass #1. A man answered nicely saying,
“Hello.”
I yelled “You’re a jackass!”, but I didn’t hang up.
The jackass said, “Are you still there?”
I said, “Yeah.”
He said, “Stop calling me.”
I said, “No.”
He said, “What’s your name, Pal?”
I said, “Don Hansen.”
He said “Where do you live?”
“1802 West 34th Street. It’s a yellow house and my black Camaro’s parked out front.”
“I’m coming over right now, Don. You’d better start saying your prayers.”
“Yeah, like I’m really scared, Jackass!” and I hung up.
Then I called Jackass #2. He answered, “Hello.”
I said, “Hello, Jackass!”
He said, “If I ever find out who you are…”
“You’ll what?”
“I’ll kick your ass.”
“Well, here’s your chance. I’m coming over right now Jackass!” And I hung up.
Then I picked up the phone and called the police. I told them I was at 1802 West 34th Street and that I was going to kill my gay lover as soon as he got home. Another quick call to Channel 13 about the gang war going on down W. 34th Street. After that I climbed into my car and headed over to 34th Street to watch the whole thing.

Glorious!

Watching two Jackasses kicking the crap out of each other in front of 6 squad cars and a police helicopter was one of the greatest experiences
of my life!

If you liked this, it came from lotsofjokes.com I read it three months ago and I am still laughing my ass off.
It always makes me feel better.
noonch.

how did it start? well i don’t know i just feel the craving. i see the flesh and it smells fresh and it’s just there for the taking…
VvvV

[WillGolfForFood]

If someone did that to me, I’d simply hang up, then dial *56, then hang up again and tell the police that I’d just received an abusive phone call. (You can also call the police first - everything still works until you receive another phone call.)

When you dial *56, a record of the last phone call to you (caller number and time) is put in the phone company’s abusive phone log. You’re not allowed access to that log, but the police are.

It’s a spinoff of Caller-ID. I used it once when some kid called up and threatened my wife. When he asked “Do you know where I am?”, I picked up an extension and calmly explained ot him how easy it was going to be to find out and that his parents might want to prepare for a friendly visit by the local policeman. He hung up the phone real fast.

[WillGolfForFood]

(I forgot to mention that you can block caller ID, but you can’t block *56 logs. That’s one reason why only the police can access thoe logs, and then only if a calleee adds an entry to those logs and complains to them.)