DerekMichaels00 is either trolling me or I want to keep all humans away from them.
Who doesn’t realize that kissing someone, especially after they say know is not only wrong but against the law.
Seriously people, this is not hard, so her are a few steps that may help you from being a creepy rapist ass.
It is not hard to tell when you go in for a kiss if someone is pulling back, if they do STOP!!! Do not kiss them
If this person says no when you try to kiss them, STOP!!! Do not kiss them
If this person is a stranger, or exhibit the behavior in #1#2 STOP!!! Do not kiss them
If this person is you lover and they exhibit the behavior in #1#2 STOP!!! Do not kiss them.
If you for some reason do not notice #1 or #2 or if they ask you to stop or say no, STOP!!! Do not kiss them, and sincerely and thoroughly apologize for misunderstanding their desires.
If you are trying to be all cultured and fancy pants and kissing someones hand or cheek when greeting them and any part of their skin is moistened or if you have enough contact as to give them a hickey STOP!!! However, the lips do not actually touch the hand in modern tradition and you are making things awkward.
And yes, if you do any of these things is illegal, it may be called assault in one state and it may be sexual assault in another, but it is still illegal.
How you can make it past the age of 11 without understanding this just amazes me…I know the first few times can be pretty awkward…but if you can’t tell if someone wants to kiss you…you may want to work on that, trust me everyone will appreciate it.
typical liberal smear game; this is not whether about its right or wrong; this is about whether its sexual assault, or as iiiandyiii said, is on some same continuum as sexual assault. In reality, it may be an unwanted physical advance, but that does not have the same gravity as sexual assault, and groping does not have the same gravity as rape. And no one needs to explain why!
Yes this is the downside to these arguments; the other side tries to paint you as sympathetic to those who do improper things, and I’m not. I’m merely trying to oppose the attempt to make all bad actions as bad as each other, because before we know it, speeding in a car will have some sort of intersectionality reason its as bad as hitting someone with a bat, if such minded people graduate their leftist art degrees and run for office…
Stop with the liberal-hating bullshit. It is sexual assault. It’s not rape if that’s what you’re getting at but it is unwanted sexual contact.
And you paint yourself that way. Don’t blame the other posters.
For your enlightenment, assault is defined as contact or the threat of contact, not a full-on rape.
Assault
Definition
Intentionally putting another person in reasonable apprehension of an imminent harmful or offensive contact. No intent to cause physical injury needs to exist, and no physical injury needs to result. So defined in tort law and the criminal statutes of some states.
My wife has this female friend, who I generally liked. She insists on giving me a hug whenever she sees me. I’m not a physical person. I’ve let her know I don’t like it, yet she continues to do it. She thinks my discomfort is funny. Should I have her charged legally? As it is now, I try to avoid her and don’t go to places I know she’'ll be.
Grabbing anyone by their genitalia without their consent, grabbing a woman by her breasts without her consent, using physical force to kiss someone against their will.
^ ALL of these things are sexual assault. There is NO question. There is NO debate.
I thought that this was explained slowly and diplomatically to even the STUPIDEST Americans on the planet by the Jason Alexander attacking Julia Roberts scene in “Pretty Woman” If not by the hundreds and hundreds of “Law and Order: SVU” re-runs.
How-The-Flying-Fuck any person in this country can not know that but still can manage the brain power to draw breath is totally and completely beyond me.
I guess this subject is easy to TROLL, but if anyone reading this honestly thinks that grabbing anyone by their genitalia without their consent, grabbing a woman by her breasts without her consent, or using physical force to kiss someone against their will
is acceptable in America, there is only One place for you: **JAIL.
**
This transcends petty politics and is really just about trying to be human.
Have you ever been raped? I haven’t but 1 out of 5 women will be raped some time in their life. I was “lucky” enough to be born male, this means that if it did happen the “bros” would cheer me on.
Because of some historical BS my social standing goes up with sexual exploits while if I was female my social value would historically decrease which each penis that entered me. And oddly enough if I didn’t want a particular penis to enter me I would be debased and stigmatized even more.
Heck it was until O’Connor v. Donaldson in 1975, within my life time and two years before starwars came out that a woman could be involuntarily committed to a mental institution if she was promiscuous. Not too much earlier than then, and for thousands of years before then rape was a crime because it devalued the woman and even then paying off the father of the husband was typically the “cost” to a rapist.
Those of us men whom have not suffered sexual assault have been setting punishments for this for years, and to be honest we don’t know the trauma that it causes and worse we have increase it due to the silly dynamic that happens.
Ignoring silly political labels we need to tackle this as just fellow compassionate humans. We need to be sensitive to the very real risks while also being nonjudgmental.
We need to be compassionate about the cost to the victim while never being able to understand what they are going through.
Now the reason I jumped on you is because a BIG problem that we do have control over is unwanted advances and assault. The fact that “No means no” still needs be taught is an indication that we have failed at our part.
With your silly comparison about speeding and a baseball bat above you ignored intent. While someone doing 5mph over the limit may not be looking to kill someone or hurt them unwanted advances are always trying to force someone to have sex. In my admittedly ignorant mind it doesn’t matter if the “give up” after a kiss or if they have to be forced to have penetration it is still not consensual.
I don’t know about you but if I had a 1 in 5 chance of being intentionally hit by a speeding car, any car driving towards me would be a pretty frightening. With the exception of murder why should a driver whom tried to hit me with a car be less culpable if I managed to jump out of the way?
Men are not walking around with puckered lips and randomly running into women, they are forcing sexual activity on these women (yes turned out lips are a sexual organ unique to human mating and socialization)
But lets be clear, you were asking for proof it was illegal, just intentionally touching someone whom does not want to be touched is a crime. If you do it after they stop it is a larger crime.
While I am sure you will hand wave this away as some vast left wing conspiracy to punish men it is really just something that you should do as a good member of society.
I am not sure why this is such a hard concept but damn your post was more than pit worthy.
The first step is to tell her, very firmly and very certainly, that you don’t like this and want her to stop. Do this in front of witnesses, witnesses of your choice who will back you up for the next steps if necessary.
If she continues, go to a lawyer, with affidavits from the witnesses, and have him write her a letter telling her to stop.
If she continues (damned unlikely) go to court to get a restraining order.
If she continues (astronomically unlikely) have the order enforced.
You’ll lose her friendship entirely, but at least you’ll be free of her persistent personal assault.
ETA: and rat avatar is completely right, and the gang of idiots who think that forced kissing is “not sexual assault” are raving idiots.
So, let me get this straight… I had this one aunt when I was a kid, she always wanted to kiss me on the cheek. I absolutely hated it as a kid, mostly because she always wore some kind of smeary lipstick.
That was sexual assault?
In many cultures, a kiss is a standard greeting (praise Cthulhu that it isn’t here, but it certainly is rather harmless compared to, you know, actual sexual assaults). I guess if it goes further than a simple kiss on the cheek… What my aunt did annoyed me to no ends as a child, but I can’t fathom calling it sexual assault. Doesn’t that require some actual sexual motivation?
I didn’t say they were the same, you cowardly, lying bigot. If you don’t understand that sexual assault is very, very bad (if not as bad as rape), and it is actually on the same continuum as rape, then you’re even more of a fucking idiot then I thought.
If she forces physical contact on you that is unwanted, and you have made it clear that this is unacceptable, then I would fully support you involving law enforcement. It’s not okay for anyone to do that.
It’s not okay to touch people that don’t want to be touched. If it happens once, tell them to stop. If it happens again, you can tell them more forcefully or you can tell the authorities. It’s not okay.
Many parents now discourage aunts from randomly kissing their kids without consent. “Would you like Aunt Laura to give you a kiss?” “Would you like to give Aunt Laura a kiss?” If they say no, you respect that. Its part of teaching them that they are in control of their own bodies - and by extension, other people are in control of theirs.
I’ve had to have “the conversation” with my sister about my nephew’s behavior to my daughter. “She controls her body, there is no 'boys will be boys.” When she says no, I expect your boys to respect that." (To be clear, its the poking at each other behavior that I’ve seen plenty of young boys do - nothing sexual - but you don’t touch someone if they say no.)
Now, you don’t call the cops on your cousins or Aunt Laura. But parents do explain to other adults that it is not ok, and if the behavior doesn’t change, they make sure the behavior doesn’t have a chance to occur.