Okay, folks, now for something completely different.
[sub](See how many items we can add to the check-list here)[/sub]
This OP certainly has something wrong going on. I can see certainly that this is true, but only vaguely what the problem actually is. I can’t see enough detail to make a meaningfully helpful diagnosis or offer any actual specific practical suggestions. I mean, beyond the obvious surface-level details about the spelling and grammar and that opulent $800/mo salary.
Now, everybody: What have I just said different than what everybody else knows about this case? Nothing, that’s what.
Here’s a guy who can’t attract a GF and he doesn’t know why and all the responses are either
(a) snark, or
(b) vague suggestions of what he should do.
Very little that’s actually specific that he can actually go out and start doing now.
(Except possibly improving his education.)
Getting professional counselling (as suggested by some) costs about the same per hour as prostitutes, with absolutely NO guarantee (or even likelihood) of anything useful coming from it. (Don’t ask me how I know all that.)
Everyone “knows” that guys without much money, income, a car, or a job can’t get the girl. Yet there are guys lacking any or all these things that have GF’s or wives.
Everyone “knows” that a guy has to be a handsome gorgeous hunk to get a GF. Yet there are not-so-good-looking-at-all guys with GF’s.
(What’s that I read above? WhyNot ditched a young gorgeous college prof to set up housekeeping with an old disabled guy?)
Everyone “knows” that a guy has to be outgoing, gregarious, witty, charming, and funny to get a GF. Yet there are shy, quiet, introverted guys who don’t talk much with GF’s.
Everyone “knows” that the females only want “tall” guys, and short guys haven’t got a chance. Yet there are…
[sub]Uh, I’ll get back to you on that one.[/sub]
Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, ad infinitum, ad nauseum. There are infinitely many things a guy has to do or be to get the girl that everyone “knows”, and every one of those things you’ll find guys lacking, yet they have GF’s.
And yet… And yet… The boards are still crawling with the Yakuza’s of the world who can’t get a date to save their lives. So what’s wrong with those dudes? They could be doing everything (?) right and still be sitting home alone their whole lives. Witness this quote, describing a stereotype:
(Okay, so even Santorum managed to get married somehow. Plenty others don’t.)
There are ugly guys with GF’s and good-(enough)-looking ones without.
There are poor guys with GF’s and well-employed financially comfy ones without.
There are jackass bastard shitheads with GF’s and genial, amiable, polite guys without.
There are drug-addled crazies with GF’s and sober intelligent guys without.
There are high-school drop-outs with GF’s and college grads without.
(Hmmmm… Is there some pattern here?)
There are short guys with… Uh, we’re still waiting on that one. Stay tuned.
There’s been a thread around for a few years (that gets resurrected every now and then) in which posters vie for bragging rights on how recently they got laid, or how many years it’s been the last time. (It think the record was something around 40+ years.)
There’s that on-going dating advice thread. What’s it up to now? 2500 posts or so? Has anyone written anything there that’s helped anyone?
I’ve seen articles from Silican Valley about women who run “dating coaching” services, at exorbitant prices, to coach all the hi-tech software geniuses and electronics engineers who look sharp, dress sharp, pull $80K, drive a late-model Prius, and still can’t get a second date.
What do any of you posters knows about what Yakuza issues really are, or what to do about it. If he learns to write like Winston Churchill he still won’t have a GF. Is he decent-looking? How well does he dress? A million things you-all can’t tell from his posts here. A few things you-all CAN tell, but nobody here can really tell why he can’t get a GF, or really what to do about it. Just like in that on-going dating thread.
So half of the posters are doing just what we do in America (and maybe everywhere) with guys like that: We give them meaningless vacuous advice, bull-shit, double-talk, and lies (BSDL) and maybe some empty encouragement (somewhere out there there’s just the girl for you), and when all that fails, put-downs, snark, and heels ground in their faces.
And we pile on the stereotyped ideas of what people really do or don’t want in relationships, all to the end of making it all the sorry guy’s own damn fault, or to deny that losers like that can even really exist at all. (Witness those two recent nearby threads that grude started.)
( Yakuza, how tall are you, by the way? )
Maybe – just maybe – Mr. Yakuza will find that one-in-a-million perfectly compatible fish in the sea, and live happily ever after. Or maybe not. But I double that anything anyone can write here will have much to do with it, one way or another. (Well, except maybe the suggestion to get more education, but even that’s no guarantee.)
Okay, I’m going to click “Submit” now before I dare re-read all the above.
One… Two… Three…
Done!
ETA: That idea to start his own escort service is a good one too, but I think he’ll first need to get some of that management experience that he’s so looking forward to in the next 10-15 years.
More ETA: I see that a whole lot of new posts have been posted in the time I spent writing all the above! So some things might get a little out of context.