Some time back I was at a convention with a bunch of male co-workers. Our first night in town we ended up at a strip joint. I was designated driver so I got to enjoy all this while sober. To pass the time (yes, time passes slowly when you are sipping Cokes and turning down polite offers to be “raped in the back room,” as one woman termed it) I played Junior Anthropologist and observed human beings at work and play.
The thing that struck me most was that, while attractive enough, the women were rather ordinary looking. Granted, I had to work hard to recognize this, as it required I imagine them with their clothes ON. In particular, one woman, whom I will call Ecstacy because they all had Phony Stripper Names, had the guys in my group all going nuts, paying for lap dances and generally handing her all their money wrapped in a bow. I was expecting at least one of these guys to leave his wife for her.
Well, I looked at young Ecstacy with my jaundiced eye and saw a woman these guys would not have noticed had she been wearing clothes and not rubbing herself all over them. I thought she was cute, but I know these guys and what they notice. She wasn’t it.
So, to complete the sentence in the title, nothing makes an ordinary woman seem beautiful like her being naked and rubbing her bottom on your crotch while you are drunk. I suppose this is an obvious conclusion, but now it has been Scientifically Verified. And you ladies who are not confident about your looks, give it a try. It seems to work really well.
We also paid for lap dances for the lesbians who were in the club, but that’s another story.
And outside of work, they’re even more so. The only true way to guage a dancer with her clothes on is extremly well defined calves (5" heels will do that to you) and an unseasonable tan. Even that’s not reliable.
Point is, they ARE just regular girls.
And she doesn’t even have to be a stripper! Take heed Ladies!
Though actually, now that I think about it, you don’t even have to be naked. Or use your bottom. As long as you rub I’m pretty sure they’ll think you’re beautiful.
Sheesh, you’d think she could come up with something better than that. I mean, when I was a dancer, I used Taylor as my stage name…it was SOOOOO much more believeable, ya know?
If a woman has an attitude of being beautiful, because they feel it and believe that they are, it shows. Self confident women are very sexy. Even girls that really aren’t physically pretty can be incredibly sexy with the right 'tude. And on the same note, a stunning beauty, if she is self concious about how she looks and unsure of herself, loses that beauty entirely, at least to me.
Right on the money. I have a friend who is downright ordinary, even awkward if you looked at her clinically. Only apparently no one ever told her that. She behaves as confidently as if she was born with ideal everything. She not jealous of other women, of self-conscious about herself. And god is she ever successful. Professionally, socially, personally.
I don’t frequent titty bars, but the last time I was in one, I was struck by the confidence of one of the more plain-faced ones. She didn’t even have the kind of body most women would be proud to show off. But she had extraordinary confidence and assurance. I insisted on stuffing some money in her g-string.
Total agreement. But I was trying to look at them in comparison with the “typical” standard of beauty these days, like Pamela Anderson, enormous fake breasts and all. Lemme tell ya, I got more on top than most of these women had: A and B cups. But they had that “I’m sexy!” attitude Turbo mentioned and it worked.
And I’ve always though Martha Stewart had it going on. Maybe she’s no Debbie Fields, but…
As far as Martha, yeah I’d do her. Kinda like the librarian thing. She’s so uppity and demure and crafty and stuff that I just KNOW that she loves to scream obscenities while she’s getting cornholed while being tied to a hand-wrought iron headboard with silk ropes she made from her own silkworms, dressed in home tanned leather and having her homemade beeswax candles dripping wax down on her nekkid flesh, letting her natural juices pour down on her hand sewn quilt made from the sails of the Mayflower and…
and…
Whoa… sorry about that. Martha Stewart? Yeah, she’s okay.
Debbie Fields cooks.