It’s Match Play at the World Golf Championship, and Obama is dormie on hole 15. Romney is on the tee box, looking at a dogleg left knowing that he normally fades the ball. His caddie hands him a 3-wood, but he says “No, give me the driver, dammit!” Obama says “Proceed, Governor.”
Unfortunately for Romney, Obama has the ball on the 45 and it’s 1st and 5 after another Romney penalty. The clock is ticking and Romney is out of timeouts and has too many men on the field as well, which I seem to recall is not a good thing.
Doesn’t look good for Romney, but I suppose he could cause Obama to drop the ball…but Obama has a great running game that can really eat up the clock, and averages 4 yards a carry, so it’s going to be rough…
My second hands me a revolver with four empty chambers and a fifth loaded with a bullet manufactured by a subsidary of Bain Capital. I spin the cylinder, push the barrel against my temple, and with a trembling hand, pull the trigger…
It’s a beer-chugging contest down at O’Mally’s bar. The bartender has lined up 5 freshly poured glasses of Guinness for each contestant. They look each other in the eye. Obama slowly smiles and lets out a little laugh.
“The calm confidence of a Methodist with four aces.”
- Mark Twain
d8-d1 +
a1-a2
f5-e6 +
a2-a3?
b7-b5!
(mate in 3)
Obario’s facing the boss in the final level, and he’s already got him down to 50% power. Obario is at 80% on his heart meter, and has a heart restoration mushroom he hasn’t used yet.
The score is oogey-boogey to Q12. Romney has pushed the Calvinball through the time-fracture wickets, but Obama hit the opposite pole when they went into undertime, forcing Romney to enter the pernicious poem place and recite all his campaign commercials in iambic hexameter or forfit the match.
Finish him!
Perhaps if they were playing polo…
Obama’s at Tottenham Court Road with an easy lateral through West Hampstead and a safety at Barbican.
Romney’s at West Croyden with forced blocks at both Mansion House and Barking.
Advantage, Obama.
“Wait a moment, the Soviet coach is talking to the officials, raising an objection about the clock…”
Well, if we assume 80% chance of victory, then it would be pocket QQ heads-up against any random two cards.
Alternatively, it’s AA against a lower pocket pair.
Obama has seven monopolies - with houses - and he just landed on Free Parking. Romney has Boardwalk and Park Place, plus the railroads and the utilities, but he’s stuck in jail and he’s on his last chance to roll doubles.
Obama just picked up a Chance card and advanced to Go.
Of course Romney is the top hat and Obama is the howitzer.
For baseball, according to this, it looks like a 20% win chance is equivalent to Bottom of the 9th with one out, down by 1, with a man on 1st.
Obama has made his way to Charing Cross, and Romney is trying to make a play to Southwark. That might be a wise strategy, except that Romney didn’t realize that at the second debate they agreed on Houndslow Manor Rules, and lateral passes aren’t authorized.
'Nuff said.
Psst… Post 31. 
That’s not a word!
Tube races? Or what?
He can spell “job” with that. Obama is a job creator!