Odd stories you never really wanted to hear

So I’m sitting in the dentist’s chair a couple of days ago, about 45 minutes into the prep for my latest crown and trying to concentrate on things far more pleasant, when the dental assistant says something about “at least his beard’s not moving”. The dentist says: “What, no flying ants?” Ha-ha-ha.

Since my mouth had a dam, a suction hose, at least two hands and sharp instruments in it, I was unable to even grunt “Whuh?”

After all the hardware was removed, I asked them WTF they were talking about. Seems they had an elderly patient a few years ago who was sporting a very large and bushy beard. They had to aneth. . .anness…put him out, but after he was conked, they noticed that his beard was still moving.

Cautiously poking around caused a flying ant to emerge, then another, then three more! Gahhhhhhh!!! How in the hell can you not know you have things living on your face? These are not things I really want to know about. Seriously.

Maybe he had wooden teeth (or a wooden head) and they were carpenter ants?