Of course I want to go lap dancing, thanks.

The BBQ Pit
1

Today I went shopping for a special birthday card. My Granny hits 100 next week, so i wanted to get her something that will look good alongside the one that I believe is sent from the Palace.

for understandable reasons, there’s not a lot of selection in the card market for the over 80’s, but I picked up a nice card, took it to the shop counter and handed over my money. The card was handed back to me, in a small plain carrier bag. I thanked the shop assistant and left.

When I left the shop, I happened to look inside the bag, and alongside the greetings card was a dancer’s bare arse.

The aforementioned bare arse was on a flyer advertising a lap dancing club that will be opening this weekend. I returned to the shop, and asked the shop assistant if they were aware of the flyer in the bag, on the off chance that they have recycled a bag and the flyer was in there by mistake. No, the lady told me she was employed by both the card shop and the club, and she was told by her boss to stick the flyers in the bags. I dumped the flyers on the counter and left.

I’m no prude, and this is certainly not the most offensive flyer I’ve ever seen, but do you really need to promote your club by slipping flyers in alongside the greetings cards unannounced?

So I’m mildly pitting the shop assistant for sticking the flyers in the bag, but the severe flames are for the boss of both venues for requiring the flyers to be distributed in this manner. May you find you have a previously un-noticed paper-cut when you eat pickled onions from the jar.

TLDR. 2for1 at a strip club, strictly over 90’s only.

2

They didn’t hire a marketing guy for the project. The lady at the counter should have been instructed to say, “Thank you for shopping here. By the way can I interest you in…”

3

Shoulda saved it, and slipped into into the card from the Palace.

“Now there’s a monarch who is interested in the happiness of her subjects!”

4

Okay, I’m a little confused. Are you saying it’s the same guy who owns both the card shop and the strip club? Because the woman at the counter said she worked at both but that doesn’t mean she only has one boss. It could be that her strip club boss told her to put the flyers in the bags at her card shop job and her card shop boss is unaware of the situation.

On the positive side, if it is the same boss and he’s interested in cross-promotions like this, he must be running holiday-themed promotions at his strip club. Maybe you get a free tree ornament with every lap dance in the VIP lounge.

5

I’m assuming it’s the same guy that owns both premises. If not, I don’t expect her to have a long career at the card shop.

Well if I’d known that, I would have kept the voucher! :smiley:

6

The way it was phrased the lady behind he counter appears to also have a second job working as a lap dancer.

7

Why would you assume that? Even if both were owned by the same person, there is no way in hell said business owner would be stupid enough to pass out flyers through his card shop.

OTOH, if it’s different people, the guy who owns the strip club has no personal investment in the card shop. So sure, he’s going to tell stupid stripper/cashier lady to pass them out at the card shop. It’s no skin off his nose.

Bonus points for him not giving a fuck if his cashier/stripper friend gets fired from her other job.

8

I think there is a larger issue here. How does spotthegerbil have the right to deny his 100 year old grandmother a birthday lap dance?

9

I didn’t see that.

But I did notice spotthegerbil objected to the idea of discount lap dances for seniors. I’m all for that. Those girls need the money for school!

10

Given the owner’s penchant for cross-promotion, OP can relax knowing that the strip club won’t be in business for very long.

Think about it. Flyers for strip clubs in greeting card bags. What do you think he has his strippers doing? That’s right. They’ve been instructed that during every lap dance they have to ask the customer “when was the last time you thought about your nanna? Why not send them a nice card?”

11

I hear the club has a champagne room where you can buy some bobble-head action.

12

Somehow this seems like an appropriate place to post this. You’re not in Cornwall, perchance, are you?

13

Q: Does Hallmark make a card for that…?

(… and is there a slot inside where you put the money?)

14

Wait, someone gave you free porn and you’re bitching about it?

15

This.

Seriously that’d be the only card shop I’d go to from now on.

16

BTW as far as I know one doesn’t “go lap dancing”* but rather, one goes and “gets a lap dance.”

*Unless one is a stripper I suppose.

17

We didn’t want to hurt her feelings. The dancing isn’t a problem, but we don’t think the dance club has a stair lift.

And joking aside, unfortunately it looks like the small gathering we had planned for the weekend is off, as she has the cold. :frowning:

No, the other end of the country. She sounds like quite an interesting lady. Thanks for sharing.

The flyer was an example of poor composition. They hadn’t even considered the rule of thirds, and the model’s legs and head were cut off. It wasn’t much more than an arse. Free or not, I would only rate it 3.5/10 for artistic merit. I do have standards… :wink:

18

I would really to have a like a lap dance, I think that I’ll give you a chance.

Congrats on the new job!

Although I wouldn’t put that card near the geriatric birthday cards.

19

You should have offered this critique to the lady at the shop. I find such tactics very effective. After a couple go-rounds, either the offending behavior stops altogether, or people give each other that “Oh lord, it’s her” look and make a special point of not giving me their pamphlet/sales pitch.

And wish your granny happy birthday for us.

20

they would be better off and you might not complain if it was a coupon for “get one free”.