So, here I am, sitting on the sofa, knitting a new winter hat. Why am I doing this? Why, because I have no job, and so I like to make myself useful. I have already knitted a new hat and scarf set for my hubby for Christmas. I may later get up and take a lovely stroll to the Locks.
Why do I have no job? Very simple: I have no SSN - I am still waiting for my visa to be processed. Certainly, it’s taking some time, but I am patient, and willing to follow the rules. Until then, I am still a visitor in this beautiful country. That said…
The telephone rings, and I answer it. “Hello?”
A man at the other end says, “Hello, ma’am, this is soandso from suchandsuch Co. I was just calling to tell you that you have been approved to receive a credit card from us.”
“Oh, boy!” I say. “Yay!”
“Oh, good, I’m glad you’re so enthusiastic about it!” the man says.
“Oh, yes,” I say. “Do go on.”
“Well, you get a $5000 credit limit to start…”
“Oh, WOW!” I interrupt.
“Yes, quite nice, but you deserve it.”
“I have been quite good with my past credit.”
“Oh, yes, we know. Now.”
“Oh, dear, there’s always a little catch, isn’t there?” I ask, worriedly.
“Now, now, it’s not that bad. It’s very simple, actually.”
“Oh, good!” said I.
“Before we can send you this new credit card, we need your old credit card information. To verify, you understand.”
“Oh, that sounds so simple! Let me go get it.”
“Wonderful, ma’am! Let me know when you’re ready.”
I make vague rummaging noises. I haven’t actually left the sofa. I knit a row.
“Hmm… just give me a moment, I know I have it somewhere.”
“Certainly, ma’am, take your time. I’ll be ready.”
“Ah! Found it. Now, what information about it do you need?”
“Ah, the number, and date…”
“Oh, yes, yes, I understand… it’s…” I pause.
“Yes? Is there a problem?”
“Sir?”
“Yes?”
“May I ask a quick question, before I read this off?”
“Of course, ma’am.”
“I’m approved for this new card?”
“Yes.”
“What’s my name?”
…
…
Click. Beeeeeeep.
Fun. 
