reaches into box marked October 8 and throws confetti joyously
~* ~@/~* ~\ + ~ ~@/~* ~\ +
~ ~@/~* ~\ +/~ ~` +
Happy Birthday Dave!
/~ ~` + ~ ~@/~* ~\ +
~ ~@][COLOR=teal]/~* ~\ +[/COLOR]~ ~@ /~* ~\ + ~ ~@/~* ~\ *+
Girl, YOU’ve got a good hand of throwing!
Psst, **Wyatt? ** You didn’t see an bad-tempered aardvark here somewhere, did you? With a pink rosette tied to its snout? The zookeeper warned me he would get VERY grumpy once the sedation wore off. I’m beginning to think it was a bad idea to borrow it. Lord knows how it’ll respond to the firecrackers, tonight.
Sorry about that, Davebear. 
You’ll get your present later. It was an… ehhmm…a very big bottle of Champagne. Yeah, that was what it was. Brut. Yeah.
I never noticed that, before, but you’re right. How odd.
Not unless the physical labor was really strenuous and/or nasty.
No. Maybe you better re-send them.
Yummm! But, if I have to be president to get that kind of treatment, it just ain’t worth it.
Not for long.
Wow! Thank you. I’m honored that you would invest the effort for my birthday.
Thanks, Mama Mo. But, I don’t think you want to smear frosting on this hairy old body. That would be kinda gross.
“Waiter! There’s food in my hair!”
[J. Benny]Rochester![/J. Benny]
[Ronnie] Weeeell…Mommie? What do we think about this? [/Ronnie]
Ooh! Yes, please! shiver
Aaaawww! Boooo! We want a story! We want a story! We want a story!
Thanks, dude!
Thanks! But, no, they don’t let ya walk aroud nekkid on your birthday, around here, thank god. There are waaaaaay more people I’d rather not see nekkid than there are ones I would like to see nekkid. It’s too cold here, anyway. And, you know what cold does to “the boys”.
Ooh! Pretty! Thanks, Dream Girl! It’s a lot of work, ain’t it?
I heard that! I ain’t deaf, yet! And, that better not have been Nomaardvark! I thought you’d gotten him a mate. Or a custom-fitted carrying case.
Hmmm. Okay…you wanna pop my cork for me?
I am not!
But you’re worth the extra work Dave. 
psst. Dave. No one’s gonna believe you’re 39 if you’re making Jack Benny jokes…
Happy Birthday!!!
::breaks into song… The best is yet to come, and Dave, won’t it be fine!::
giggle found your … giggle … friend from the zoo, …giggle… Maastricht … giggle … he’s not in a … giggle … bad mood … giggle … at all … he’s … giggle giggle … over here …giggle ha ha giggle giggle… cleaning up … giggle giggle … my … hey, now … giggle … personal typos … giggle … bwahahahahahahaha … not there!
editors note: of Course all the above giggles were giggled in a Very Manly way … quite Manly giggles, every single one of them!
comes in an quietly hands out the tootlers and cute little pointed paper hats from the box Maastricht brought … 1 little pointy hat for each guy, 3 little pointy hats to each D.Bear Babe
announcer voice … ahem … ahem … me me me me me … ahem ahem…
[volume=1] test test
[volume=13]
Attention Everyone …one … one …one
We Have an Announcement to Make!!! …ake… ake …ake …ok … that got old fast…
Will the person who owns the Bright Red 1977 Cadillac Convertable …
[hand over mike]*Wow … I sound Just like one of those announcer-radio guys on this thing!!! This is really cool! … but wait … That wasn’t what we were supposed to be announcing!
[on stage directors head-set … cue the dancing girls!]
[/hand on mike]
Attention Everyone … Babes, Men, Pit Vipers, Aardvarks, Geeks, Scholars, Propeller Heads, and Lurkers Everywhere …
[hand on mike] [on stage directors head-set…Cue the drum roll]
[/hand on mike]
We Have a Very Important Occasion to announce…
[on stage director’s head-set … cue confettii]
It’s D.Bear’s Birthday today!!!
-
-
-
-
-
- Happy Birthday D.Bear!!! * * * * * *
-
-
-
-
Brought to you by Rocky, If 6, and Maureen with some help from Wyatt
[deeper announcer voice]
and there is a Very Special Award for this occasion!!!
To you, D.Bear hands the big guy a man sized tissue
From All of us, near and Far, winging it’s way to you, via the magic of On-Line shopping …
.
.
.
.
.
.
We’d Like to Present to you …
.
.
.
.
.
The most Fitting award we could imagine …
.
.
.
.
*pauses for a moment … not for drama, but because he’s completely distracted by the bouncy jiggly giggly dancing D.Bear Babes … now That’s a Lot o’ boobage!
.
.
.
.
We’d Like to present you with …
.
.
Your
.
Very
.
Own
.
Spork!!!
.
.
no, wait, that’s not it …
shuffle papers … shuffle papers
whispering … sorry D.Bear you’re gonna have to go out to Taco Bell and pick up your own spork …
Because we have, winging it’s way to you, In Real Life … no Cyber gift this …
.
.
.
Your Very Own Bright Purple P I M P … H A T!!!
Oh, just imagine the respect you’ll receive as you go tooling around town in
THIS!!!
This Beautiful Purple Pimp Hat!!!
You’ll be the envy of everyone at every dope fest you attend …
and just imagine the awe of the folks at your next company drunk-fest! When you get waited on first in line with your Fabulous hat that just Says …
“Babes in Blues Bars Dig Me!”
::leafs through well-thumbed copy of “Care And Feeding Of Your Aardvark”, chapter “Aardvarks in Love”::
ehhmm… ** Wyatt…**
That’s right, or magnificent stud and Sensei
We Actually DID do this, Just For You!
This fabulous hat comes complete with HUGE fancy feather and a terrific amount of chutzpah … and it is ALL Yours, D.Bear
From all of us, here in OMFG land!
Thank you Theresa…
Dessert, on the other hand, will be contributed by individual contributors, The boys and I will not be contributing … grin
but I’ve already claimed the video rights…
So, D.Bear pauses to hand the big guy another tissue, to dry his eyes
THIS IS YOUR BIRTHDAY LIFE!
CONGRATULATIONS!
[end announcer voice] cough cough … wow, that’s tough on the throat
uh… happy birthday, D.Bear
!@#%^&*()_+=~ZV#^&@%(O
!@#%^&*()_+=~ZV#^&@%(O
!@#%^&*()_+=~ZV#^&@%(O
Hummmmmm that doesn’t that look like confetti does it? Sorry I’m so late to the party folks. Sometimes I get seduced by the technology. (today it was color), and sometimes there’s WORK to be done first thing in the morning. Shesh these people…
Happy B-day Dave, and you’re right about the icing thing
However, having a similar problem I have sought and found a solution. Honey powder. It’s dry and applied with a feather. Still yummy to lick off, but not nearly as sticky and messy for us…generously furred guys. There’s still a lot of ththththpitttt-ing of hair though. 
Wyatt’s initiation rituals don’t concern me nearly as much as they probably should. You see I’m insane, but luckily I’m one of the happy kind
PS. My natural skills have nothing to do with posting wink Oh and don’t EVEN get me started about my unnatural skills!
PPS. About my posting skills, Fear not soon enough I’ll do something to display my ineptivity. Like forgetting to bold someones name in a post etc…
Jaade I’ll gladly help lick off the frosting but the aforementioned honey powder doesn’t make such a mess on the sheets (Yikes I must be getting old, since when did the condition of … well anything… afterwards become a consideration?) I’ll be more than glad to watch you eat ice cream, at least until the smoke obscures my vision.
MMMMMmmmmmm Jaade in a sparkly red dress singing… I’ll be back in an hour or so…
Maureen I wouldn’t instigate you even on a dare. If I ever appear to have instigated you rest assured that it was in fact a typo induced by solar flares, and an omission of logic on my behalf. Unless you REALLY want to be instigated that is
Random thought…Simple Dreamer… Is a gift of new shoes appropriate on a first date?
Wyatt those are some extremely manly giggles you have there
And a thought about Aanold being elected. Back in the 80’s I saw a poster in a little Mexican restaurant. It was Ronnie in full cowboy regalia. Hat, boots, chaps, bandana, with gun drawn and pointed at the camera. The caption read El Presidente de los United States. No wonder other countries think we’re crazy
Dave I’m extremely envious of your purple pimp hat. Where can this stylish headgear be purchased? Tell the studio audience** Wyatt**
That Dave is a BAAAD Mother F… [sup]Shut yo’ mouth![/sup] I’m just talkin’ 'bout Dave.
Well, we can dig it!
ahem … fixed linkYup, we really all chipped in to buy you this
ShotgunZen, you musta missed the part where I’m married. So I wouldn’t know about the appropriateness of a first date shoe gift.
Yay Dave! Happy happy birthday. blows kiss Many, many more to you.
Ya know… I just noticed… That woman in the ad… WHAT is all over her mouth and boobage??? :eek:
Happy Birthday, dear one. Actually, the hat is from everyone in the thread. And **Salem, White Ink, Dreamer, tanookie, Jaade, sorella, Optihut, ** and whoever else I’ve forgotten (sorry) were all pivotal in the whole Operation PPH (as it is now known to the D’bear Birthday Conspiracy Club). Enjoy. And, we want pics. 
I think it is now time for the Official Birthday Can Can.
Youse other DBear babes, please slip into the fishnets, dancing heels and poufy can can skirts that were deposited on yer doorsteps in the wee hours this morning.
Ready? Okay
cues the musicians…
anda one, anda two anda
get.
your.
kick.
up!
cancan madness