Good morning everyone. Spiders, snakes, various creepy crawly things. I am either the dispatcher, or rescuer thereof, depending on their location and my mood at the moment. On a side note I rescued a turtle from the middle fo the road two weekends ago. He had already been hit, and chipped, but was still alive. Took him out in the woods and turned him loose. He walked off so I assume he survived. Oddly enough I had good weather the rest of the day. It rained all around me but I stayed dry… <shrug>
I’ve been a bit absent the past couple of days ‘cause I’m definitely preoccupied with the layoffs and aftermath here, but the comments about Wyatt not being able to find his A reminded me of something I worked up for a meeting once… Ahem… “YOU COULDN’T FIND YOUR OWN ASS WITH BOTH HANDS, A MAP, A FLASHLIGHT, A SIX MAN SUPPORT TEAM, AND A MISSION STATEMENT!”
Sorry but that just sounds better when you shout it
All our management got rearranged and I have a meeting at 10:00 with everyone in my new department. I wonder if that phrase will come in handy?
YAY!!! Zen, the protector of turtles!
Here’s another phrase that might come in handy… BECAUSE I SAID SO, THAT’S WHY! You could also play the fear card… We’ve laid off plenty of people lately, a few more won’t hurt. 
Nah, If6 I’m a peon. I can only yell at/threaten other peons. I haven’t done that in many years. I’m a pretty mello guy don-cha-know…
Well, at least it was just a spider or something … those just make me eeeeeek!!! But, Spiders will cooperate with a capture and release program. Water glass, piece of paper and Boop we’re outside relocating that little varmit.
But, here on the ol’ homestead, I have Some Place from which issue WASPS into the house!!!
THAT makes me want to make noises suitable only to 8-year-old-future-women-persons!!!(which I am not now, and never have been a member of that community)
The only salvation is the fact I have a Canister style vacuum … so, I can grab that long metal tube, right out of the suck-the-dirt-out-of-the-carpet-part, and carrying my weapon of choice, like a little vacuum bazooka, I creep up on the little bugger, suction on full … and Suck him right down into the bowls of that cleaning machine! Then, that inspires me to do a little vacuuming around the house, don-cha-know, just to be sure the scary mucho-dangerous little devil ain’t a-comin’ back out … ever …
No no no no no … have you NO sense of History?
Northern Lights in places they aren’t usually seen aren’t the harbinger of spiders!!! Its Triffids! Triffids, I tell you! Protect your eyes.Oh, wait, that was a meteor shower … blush Ok, you can have your spiders falling from the Northern Lights … *raises hand to claim the part of the-guy-who-runs-through-town-screaming-“They’re Here They’re Here” then-gets-to-die-horribly-and-slowly-right-on-screen! No, wait, that guy would have to be covered with spiders, huh? Eeeeeek! (hastily scribbles addendum to contract: Only fake spiders will be used to cover that guy … and not even very realistic fake spiders …) (we now return you to more current programming that does not give away the age of any poster in question … I only saw the Triffids thing in reruns, on TV, and it was already really old then, they had to stop and re-splice the film, several times, right during the TV showing, it was so old … and you could hear the projector going whirrrrrrrr all the way through … and … and … oh, kids now days never had actual movie projectors going whirrrrrr in their class rooms? Even that was Way Back When? … I’ll just shuffle off into the corner now, and gum my high protein and vitamin adult breakfast stuff out of the can …)
Darlin’ I am saving a Treat for you!!! But you might just need a bigger box … er … uh … bag …!!! I’ll be there at the door, waiting for ya!
Turtle? Maybe it Was a Cooter?!?!?!?!
Love your statement of instruction!
THAT is the sort of stuff they SHOULD be teaching at Harvard Business School … but, sadly, they don’t. It is one of the many things one has to learn on their own, out in the real world. (rolling on the floor laughing … like the average business with more than 8 people actually has anything to do with ‘real world’!!!)
Thump Thump Clap
Thump Thump Clap
Baby you’ve got great hands
right there
hold firm
Don’t let go, now, we’re almost there…
Hold those breasts right in place,
to Make sure they’re safe
Don’t let those hands roam
all over the place
We Are
We Are
Clampions!!!Clap
Thump Thump Clap
We Are
We Are
Clampions!!!
enter guitar riff…
*sometimes I make myself laugh …
Okay gang, I am feeling a little lazy today so forgive me for not quoting…but just to catch up,
I actually LIKE spiders. They eat bugs and I think that is cool. I keep an eye out for brown recluse and black widow etc…but the general graden variety little black spiders or even big ole nasty fruit spiders are welcome in my garen or in my house. (Just thought I’d tell ya’ since it’s Halloween)
I like snakes too - only thing that scares me is rats, mice & roaches…yes I realize that isn’t really logical…but that is what makes me scream like a little girl and cling to the ceiling tiles from my fingernails.
Any bras that will not come off should be addressed to my ex boyfriend the studmuffin…that man can remove a bra faster than any woman I know including me…I asked him h ow he learned that and he told me some silly thing. I never belived him but he could give those male nurses some classes.
Wyat, I am sure you have a great clasp…
Hope everyone has a Happy Halloween…
Bwahahahahahahahahahahah!
Well, 6 and Salem, I’m with mipiace on this one. As far as I’m concerned, spiders rule! Snakes too! And I don’t even mind mice and rats. But I despise roaches, though the heel of my boot loves them lots. 
I grew up R/V camping with my family at a lot of Tennessee’s state parks. Summers had many nature education activities, so, much to the dismay of my parents, I learned about finding and identifying snakes and spiders when I was quite young. I’ve caught so many snakes in my lifetime, I’ve lost count. I even kept a copperhead for a week or so, until the poor little guy had his head removed from his body in a Duncan MacLeod sorta fashion by my dad, who was wielding a hoe.
Carefully avoids making any comments about Rocky’s dad hanging out wif a ho …
Not going to make ho joke …
noT going to make ho joke
No ho joke No No NO … Bad Joke … No
Sit … Stay!
Whew*! That was close!
Well, I found my bank card…buried in my Floppy disk drive, courtesy of the two year old, complete with magnetic strip, mind you…
I have surgically removed the card, but now my 'puter is not happy at all. I’m lucky I’m even on here right now. Had to disconnect the power supply to the A-drive in order to get it working. It doesn’t want it’s cover on, either. I’m sitting in front of a naked 'puter!~ So if I disappear in a puff of smoke~
~
~__~~[sup]~[/sup]
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:eek:
Wyatt, you’ve outdone even yourself with that song! bwahahahahaha and more~
[Homer]Ummmm nekkid computering[/Semi-stale Simpsons Joke]
I love the vacuum cleaner trick, and I have been known to vacuum the entire house and the front yard too if needed just to make sure the little critter had had the life sucked out of him.
Please note I’m not saying a word about you *screaming like a little girl
snicker And I was almost to California when I realized I hadn’t switched the laundry. Damn laundry.
Triffids? I don’t remember triffids. Not that it sounds like they were from a loooooooong time ago or anything. Either I’m far too young to remember [sub]ok, who was laughing, I distinctly heard someone laughing…[/sub] or my mind simply can’t reach that far back any more.
joins Wyatt in the corner gumming things…
Hey Zen, I just rescued a snapping turtle from the edge of the road last week! He was not particularly happy to be moved, let me tell ya! Several people stopped after me, thank goodness. It took two of us to get the turtle back up on the ridge away from the traffic. I checked back a couple times and he was nowhere to be seen.
Why didn’t anyone mention it was Turtle Rescue Week? I would have gotten everyone cards.
Mipiace and Rocky, I will gladly send any stray spiders your way! I’ll just switch the hose on the vacuum and face south before hitting the exhaust button.
tanookie, how did the kids do trick or treating? I’m pretty sure my kids hauled in enough to last til Easter. Or I can let them eat it all at once and velcro cleaning tools to them. The house’ll be spotless in an hour.
My computer is still naked and it’s getting a bit chilly in here. I hope my hard drive doesn’t shrink.
Welp … the survey is IN.
“Oh, Wow! We got PopCorn!” happened a lot
“Oh, Wow! Tootsie Roll pops” … not so much so.
Mini private all-their-very-own packs of popcorn won Hands down!
or Bags up … or … what Ever!
Dang’d laundry! Don’ cha Hate that?! Just when you were gonna get … serious Treats … which Has to be somewhat similar to dessert, doesn’t it?.. and then BAM … ya remember the laundry is gonna get ucky there in the washer, if you don’t change it over!
I Never said that! I’m Sure if I let those sounds out, they would be quite a bit more like a “Tall and mature for her age” girl! I’m sure of it … but mostly I just don’t let them out. It causes quite a rift between me and my inner-screaming-tall-for-her-age-child … but, well, what if Someone Heard???
**Wyatt!!! ** Thump Thump Clap
Okay, so I’m little slow in responding
So, the PPH was a big hit with the Trick-or-Treaters, along with the rest of the outfit. For the most part, anyway. Not so much with the one little fireman (approx. four years old), who didn’t seem to approve and wanted to know what kind of costume it was.
“Your mama (Note that I successfully resisted the urge to say ‘yo mama’.) will explain it to you, later.”
“He’s a clown, dear.”
“Close enough, I guess.” Bitch ho’!
The one year old, downstairs, wasn’t at all sure about the PPH, either, but that wasn’t going to stop her from taking the candy. Amazing how quickly they learn, huh?
But, the rest of the kids, and a lot of the parents, liked it, as did my landlord and the CVS checkout girl (who was quite the cutie, for a 17 year old) when I ran out of candy too soon. Although, as I told one dad, I think Indiana Jones might have been insulted, if he’d heard that dad’s explanation of PPH. Gotta love a costume that makes people laugh and embarasses the shit out of them, at the same time. Thanks, guys.
Oh, and I think I’m already on record as liking snakes and turtles (Yay, Guns! You da’ MAN! Yay, Salem! You da’ GIRL!). I don’t like rats or mice or roaches, but they don’t bother me. Well, one roach doesn’t bother me; swarms of them creep me out. As do spiders. I think it’s partly all those eyes.
I don’t mind the excessive legs, so much, but all those eyes give me the willies. For some reason, eight eyes bothers me much more than, say, the two humungous, multi-faceted eyes on flies and bees and such. It also doesn’t help that I found out the hard way that I’m hypersensitive to spider venom. I used to like spiders more, before I discovered that. (Not a lot more, but more than I do now.) (I’m not wild about their feeding methods, either.)
BTW, did anyone else catch Shadow of the Vampire on A&E, tonight (or any other time)? Overall, I’d say the movie was pretty good, though not historically accurate. I turned it on because it was the best of bad lot of choices, but damn, I’m glad I did! What an amazing performance by Willem Dafoe as Max Schreck/Nosferatu! Without question, one of the finest characterizations I’ve ever seen. Absolutely, utterly convincing. He just was Schreck/Nosferatu.
It may help if you know Schreck played Count Orlok (also known as Nosferatu, although that’s really more of a generic name for all vampires) in the first screen version of the Dracula legend (names were changed to protect the innocent?)(actually, names were changed to avoid lawsuits), in 1922’s Nosferatu. One of the scariest performances ever. Rumors abounded, at the time, that he really was a vampire.
Ain’t sayin how I got there, but the phrase “cookie cooter 'puter” has been running through my fevered brain for the last several minutes. Just…you know…sharing.
I LOVE “he’s a clown, dear.” !!!
but Indiana Jones?!?! That’s stretching it!
I wore my wizard’s hat and my “Hairy Otter” (sent to me from an equally immature friend in Alaska) T-shirt. Got several, “Trick or treat … wow, you’re a wizard!” and a couple, “Harry Otter? That’s funny!”
Now you’ve got that phrase stuck in my head. Thank you Ever so much for THAT favor … just sayin’…
And it took me an extra long time to get all the junk out of my pocket.
Davebear!!! I love that you wore the PPH and accompanying regalia! Ya clown, you.
And roaches…they are even higher on my eeeeeew list than spiders. Disgusting things. ick, ick, ick
For the sake of the board, I will supress the little girly squeeel I feel rising.
And “just sayin’…” is my new favorite phrase.
Just sayin…
Wow I was beginning to think Dave had left us to the wolves! I am very proud that you wore the PPH to give out candy!
For the record I hate all bugs except LadyBugs. I make Parallax take the offending bug from my sight. I’ve even called him at work to beg him to do something about some such bug or another. He’s always made me wait until he got home.
Cara went trick or treating last night for the third time in a week. Haverhill had trick or treat last Saturday, her aunt’s company had a party with trick or treat and we went last night to Grandma’s and trick or treat at the neighbors there.
We have enough candy to last until next Halloween. She had some oreo’s and M&M’s and pinged off the walls for two hours before crashing on the floor under daddy’s chair.
She’s starting to make the association between her clothes and candy. ‘Oh when I wear this people give me candy’
Oh and I could explain the difference between ‘treats’ and ‘dessert’ but this isn’t the penthouse forum dearie