Long story made short (and posted in previous threads) – I hated my job (environmental engineering), thought I hated just the job itself and not the field, found a new job and hate it too. It’s a shame, because my new job is with a great company, the pay is good and the people are cool… but the work bores the bejesus out of me. I’ve done a lot of soul-searching lately and have finally come to the realization that the only way I’m going to stay sane is to find a field that I’m actually happy with and interested in.
It’s a shame, as I’ve already invested a lot of time (nine years) in my current field. I feel like I’ve wasted most of that time being unhappy and not really admitting to myself how unhappy I really was. My mantra was, “When I get a new job, I’ll be fine,” not realizing that it wasn’t just the job… it was me.
That soul-searching showed me that two fields really really interest me – law and psychology. I’m not sure which I will pursue yet (some further soul-searching is in order first) but I’m pretty sure it will be one of the two. And of course, both courses would require pretty extensive schooling (I’m an engineer by training with an MBA, so it’d be probably straight to law school for a JD, or if I decide on psychology, probably some undergrad coursework before I can get into a grad program).
When I go back to school, though, I sure as heck don’t want to go part-time – I’ve done that route before and no way. Uh-uh. Plus, going back full-time would get me headed to my goal that much faster.
In upcoming months, I’ll probably take the LSAT and the GRE both and start making my applications to grad schools (when I figure out which path I’m going to take). So hopefully at the age of 31 next year, I’ll be a full-time student again!
Any words of encouragement from those out there who’ve done something similar?
Sounds like me a year ago February/March (so… 2002). I was miserable, and even the idea of a new job (the one I left was my second one in that field) had me filled with, well, hopelessness. All I could see in front of me was years of showing up to do a job I hated.
I didn’t make the grad school decision fully on my own though - it took my boss pulling me into her office and saying “if you don’t want to be in my job in five years, you’re in the wrong field. I’ll support you in whatever way I can, although you know that I have to put the interests of the company first”. With travel that both of us were doing, I had a couple of weeks to make a decision, and I took a very hard look at my life. And I realized that it was time to do what I had wanted to do when I first finished my undergrad, before jobs and five relocations in five years got in the way. I took the GRE, and here I am now, a grad student in library and information science. I’m happy. Really happy, even though I’m crazy busy all the time.
(Oh, and the boss kept me employed until the day before I moved out of state. I trained replacements and worked to keep myself useful - it was incredibly tough at times not to give into the “I’m leaving in X days/weeks/months, why should I care” attitude. But she showed me an incredible amount of courtesy, and I felt that I owed her the same.
I’m 31 with an M.A. in literature. About a year ago I realized my current job in journalism is not going to make a satisfying career. So I did the same thing: a lot of soul-searching, asking what I really wanted, etc.
Next year, at the age of 32, I’m starting law school.
Well, I think you’re crazy and stupid for going back to school, and hope you fall flat on your face and fail spectacularly, you miserable, selfish jerk.
Hey man, it sounds like you’ve worked hard to get where you are, and it seems like you’re pretty stable, so now’s the time to do it. Part-time grad school was a real bitch for Peter to manage, and I think if he could have gone full-time (but still have his company pay for it) he would have, just to get it finished faster and really immerse himself. If I could do that now (with the undergrad I’ve just barely started) I would too. I think it’s a smart decision, so good for you, dork.
Thanks for the encouragement, all – it’s good to hear from other folks who’re already walking the path I’m considering! It’s scary to think that my life will be changing so radically – especially the “oh my god, I’m going to be a student, what will I do for MONEY” thought. But I really feel in the depths of my soul that this is going to be the right move for me.
And yeah, Gundy baby, I’ve done the part-time grad school thing too and that’s a rough way to go. I sympathize with Peter – I would like to have done my MBA full-time and have a company pay for it, but that wasn’t gonna happen. Took me a total of about four years to finish my degree and that’s WAY too long for me. This time around, I really want to do it right and immerse myself. (In what, I’m not sure. I’m considering bourbon.)
(And congrats on grad school, Lsura and jackelope!)