Ok Wal-Mart, this time you've gone too far

Not to go TMI on everyone, but I have discovered, ah, adult sanitary wipes. They’re sold in the TP isle at Wal-Mart (and pretty much everywhere else), and act much like wet wipes for grown ups. These are heaven sent as far as I’m concerned. They’re like a portible bidet.

Now for both barrels:

WHY DID YOU STOP SELLING THESE?!?! You recently used fuck rags. It’s a serious problem after you get used to that whistle clean feeling to have to skip a day. Regular TP does not “cut the mustard”. After two consecutive visits in a two month span I’ve not seen them available again. Not that any of your non english speaking employees can help by explaining this. So now I have to make an extra stop and buy them at the fucking grocery store, who has hundreds of packages in stock, but at double the price.

Wal-Mart, I point my formery clean ass in your direction and wipe with one of your circulars.

(shudder)
There’s a mental image I could have done without. Blech.

Yeah, I’ve slowly used more and more of 'em since I stocked up last year for my cat. And now you’re wondering about the cat…he does not always keep his ass clean so I have to wipe it down from time to time. Its about as nasty as it sounds like. Oh well. They work great for people too. :slight_smile:

If you’re unable to clean your ass without the hygienic equivalent of a Clorox Wipe, I feel I’m justified in suggesting some sort of at-home care.

Is this what we’ve come to as a society? Really?

Uh, why don’t you just get baby wipes? They have unscented ones, you know. They might even have flushable ones.

Recently at the pharmacists, I noticed ‘extra strong medicated toilet tissue’…really, honestly, how can this be necessary?

I tried. They’re on the whole not flushable (not even thinking about dealing with that) and they’re sized wrong.

Thinks of some of the messes she has had to clean up with baby wipes

Sized wrong? :eek:

I’m not sure we can help you.

I can see the NY Post Headlines now:

Stock Reaches The Tail End!

(They still sell them at the Walmart here in Las Vegas.)

We can only pray that she ment baby wipes were too big.

And if you’re that obsessed with having a spotless ass, just shell out the $500 and put one of these on your toilet already.

Hey, not everyone has had their “crack & sack” waxed to non stick frying pan limits of non adhesiveness! This hairy arsed skid mark says shame on you, Walmart!

I feel you’re unjustified. Just because someone has piles or anal fissures or rectal fistulae, or sphincter dysfunction because of 3rd or 4th degree perineal tears at delivery, you feel they need home care and shouldn’t be allowed out? Despite perhaps still being in their 20’s and having young kids to take care of, whose birth probably caused the problem?

QtM, MD

I think he meant normal people with no medical problems who just have some kind of weird obsession with sterilizing their ass after every dump.

You may be flipping your wig (and running around needlessly messy :D) due to a misunderstanding. Have you checked the pharmaceutical section? That’s where they’re sold in every Wal-Mart I’ve ever known.

shrug I just use flushable baby wipes, works great for me.

The nozzle sticking out under the seat bothers me. With my luck I’d shit all over it, and then the damn bidet would be squirting it back up my ass. :eek:

Damn you, Qadgop! You made me spit my drink. What the heck is a “rectual fistula?”

To the OP–Well, that’s just one more reason that you shouldn’t be shopping at Wal-Mart. And I’d be curious to know what’s wrongly sized about a baby wipe. I can’t imagine that it would be too big…do you have an especially tiny asscrack?

That was a stupid question. Baby wipes are sized to work on newborns for Og’s sake. So he must think the baby wipes are too small… :eek:

I don’t understand why the OP has to have unflushable ones. You can always just throw them away right?

And what’s with the size thing? All the adult ones I’ve seen are around the same size as far as I can tell.

Heh, actually, the bidet seats extend the nozzle(s) when spraying and retract them when not. :slight_smile: