Not to go TMI on everyone, but I have discovered, ah, adult sanitary wipes. They’re sold in the TP isle at Wal-Mart (and pretty much everywhere else), and act much like wet wipes for grown ups. These are heaven sent as far as I’m concerned. They’re like a portible bidet.
Now for both barrels:
WHY DID YOU STOP SELLING THESE?!?! You recently used fuck rags. It’s a serious problem after you get used to that whistle clean feeling to have to skip a day. Regular TP does not “cut the mustard”. After two consecutive visits in a two month span I’ve not seen them available again. Not that any of your non english speaking employees can help by explaining this. So now I have to make an extra stop and buy them at the fucking grocery store, who has hundreds of packages in stock, but at double the price.
Wal-Mart, I point my formery clean ass in your direction and wipe with one of your circulars.