Someone I was engaged to 20 years ago found me on MySpace a couple years ago. We started writing, then calling, talking for hours on the phone, very hot & heavy, just like before.
Finally, he had a family reason to fly out here from several states away, so he came to see me. Pissed me off almost immediately, stayed about three hours, then left.
Oh yes, now I remember. I left him because he was crazy.
A few years ago I got to thinking about the woman I mentioned in post 17. I sort of fantasized about what it would be like to get back together. I remembered all the good times.
All two of them.
I am relieved to see this thread isn’t what I thought it was. I thought it was about the lemon party website. Eep!
OP: Nothing wrong with having your heart pound when thinking of an old flame. You clearly say in your OP that you have chosen not to contact her so you have nothing to feel guilty about. I think it’s perfectly natural
My wife is leaving me, in part because she is “in love” with an “old flame”.
I just posted in the pit about it, as it’s more complicated than that, but i am against you dumping the woman who has been your partner for 2 decades for something “new”.
I understand the attraction, and am glad you are being smart about it.
Not a high school sweetheart (I was much too shy) a college sweetheart (beer helped me overcome my shyness).
By the way, you guys make me laugh.
This past week I had an old high school boyfriend send me his third friend request on Facebook. It must have been from a different e-mail address than the last one, because I had blocked him the last time. Because he was crazy and abusive (and as you can tell, doesn’t take hints well), and I would be very happy never to see him or think of him again.
Being taken by the love of your life and having a page on social media (i.e. Facebook) are not exactly opposing situations. How do you know she isn’t with the love of her life? He never said he saw her on a dating site.
I was recently contacted by my premier old flame on FB. He sent a very nice message about his life (happily married, living on another coast) and how he still cared (in a good way) and how he hoped I was happy, too. It was a very long time ago and we are not the same people we were before, but it is still nice to know you are still special to someone you cared about. These contacts don’t have to all be invitations to skip down the primrose path.
Ew, that’s creepy. Hopefully he gets the hint soon
Well, I’m proud to say I’ve never used Facebook to track down women I’ve been with. But I have used Google Earth to look at places where I’ve had outdoor sex.
Recently, an old boyfriend from high school friended me on Facebook. I was like, OK, let’s see how he is doing. So I browsed through his page and saw that he has been married 15 years and had two kids, and I was happy for him. No old feelings were stirred up whatsoever on my end.
So after a while he IMs me on Facebook chat. So I told him, oh hi, how are you, your family looks lovely, etc. Then he starts saying inappropriate things like, I should come see him when he’s on a business trip, lol! :rolleyes: And that his wife would kill him if she ever knew he talked to me, and that he “got shit” from her when she saw I was his Facebook friend, etc. I kind of rolled eyes, and laughed, and forgot about it.
Then a few day later I noticed he had “unfriended” me. I have to admit I wonder if he did it out of a sense of guilt, or whether his wife had found out he had chatted with me! Either way, it’s definitely for the best. Being Facebook friends with an ex can be too much temptation for people who are unhappy or bored (like I believe this particualr ex to be). It’s kind of sad because it looked like he has a really nice family, it’s too he felt the need to flirt with an ex from 20 years ago on Facebook.
For the OP (and anyone else looking up old flames on Facebook) this, this, a thousand times this.
Numbered among my Facebook friends:
(3) Ex Boyfriends
(2) Former Lovers
(2) People I’ve gone on a date or two with in the past.
I’m not nearly as much of a slut as that makes me appear. I don’t feel there’s anything inherently wrong with being friendly (in person or on Facebook) with exes, as long as nothing is hidden or could be considered cheating (emotionally or otherwise).
Maybe a year ago I received an unsolicited email from a guy I dated in HS. We’ll call him B. He said he found my friend L on Facebook and she gave him my email address.
I sent her an email: Um L? B?
She sent back: Yeah, too funny! Didn’t someone we know date him?
Me: You mean me. Remember that whole virginity thing?
Her: Oh.
Yes, my friend, without so much as a courtesy email, gave out my personal email address to the first guy I had sex with.
Thankfully, it wasn’t a huge deal in the whole scope of things because we had a decent, uncomplicated dating history and it really just fizzled out with no hard feelings on either side. I wouldn’t have sought him out but it was nice enough to catch up. It taught me very quickly to be wary of Facebook though.