I cleaned. I laundered. i dozed off on the couch. Spot trampled me awake. I’m having a Cuba Libré, since the Likker Sto has been out of Korbel brandy for 2 weeks.
I’ve never had that happen. Maybe his teeth hurt?
“One soiled.”
Especially since GG would have to look up the number for 911.
Himalayan possum. Because you find him a layin’ in the middle of the road.
As long as you don’t poop in a pew.
I’ve done the Reading at Morning Mass a time or two. I can imagine the the priest watching and thinking, “He does the reading beautifully but…the sins.” 
< visualized GG shoving chicks in his mouth as the come down the belt >
You are in one of the parts of the country where “some men need killing” is a valid defense. 
This.