OMG! I sound like Tallulah Bankhead!! (Flu rant)

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I am a zombie. Walking dead. Aches, pains, fever, dizzy, sneezy, coughy grumpy dopey slimey… I feel like the insole in John Goodman’s shoe, and probably smell about the same. I was fine going to work yesterday - my back and kidneys hurt but I just thought I was developing another kidney stone. I wish.

In 24 hours my talking voice has gone from Minnie Mouse to Tallulah Bankhead. My god, this is so weird. My mom called and didn’t recognise my voice. My cats scramble away if I speak because I sound so different. My singing voice is gone - which is just as well - I’d pass out if I took a deep breath. I have 7 Christmas perfomances this week - tonight makes 2 misses. If I could go, I’d have to sing Bass. That would scare the choir director.

For this I got the flu shot??? I do herebye pit the Center of Disease Control. Bastards. OK oops wrong forum and just too tired to move it. OK I do hereby point out that the CDC is mundane and pointless. Dammit.

Fever finally broke. Currently out of the bed only long enough for the sheets to dry. If I had more energy, I’d change them. But not worth it. Bite me, I’m not my mother. I’ll change them if I survive. I’m just going to sit here and pout for a while. Thanks for letting me whimper and whine.

2

Dahhhhling, you sound like Tallulah without the aid of gin, cocaine and cigarettes?

3

Yep - complete with the hint of a southern drawl. Scared my mom to death.

4

you REALLY DO sound like Tallulah… which, I think, is a compliment… Tallulah is soundin’ pretty good to have been dead as long as she has…

5

. . . And to forestall anyone who has the temerity to ask, “Who is Tallulah Bankhead?”

6

I hope you feel better soon.

7

You want a sucky flu story?

Try being ME!

Sure I’ve got a fever of 102.
But Mrs. Zebra has a fever of 103.
I cough for five minutes straight.

She does it for ten.

And then she tops me by telling me she’s starting her period as well so I sould quit my bitching.

8

Lucky.
Right now, I sound like Harvey Fierstein. Talullah would have been wonderful, as would Lauren Bacall. Hell, I would have settled for Bea Arthur. But nooooooooooooooooooooooo…
(except I can’t say “noooooooooooooo…” right now. The remnants of my voice won’t allow it.)

But at least it’s not the flu. It’s just a minor cold with the voice problem that won’t go away.

9

OK on the misery scale Mrs Zebra wins!! What ever energy I have left going into happy thoughts and prayers that she doesn’t have flu AND her period AND cramping!!

DeVena
(thankful that she has 1 week until her period!) And I hope Amarinth is feeling better soon!
verbenabeast tipped me onto this Breathe Right Vapor Shot[sup]tm[/sup] stuff. Get.Some. It’s like alka-seltzer for your nose - it’s this cup dealy that you fill with hot water, drop a tablet in, then breathe the fumes. It’s like a little bitty self contained vaporizer. Good Lord, I have lungs!!