Omnibus Stupid MFers in the news thread (Part 1)

I live in the UK, and the fruit and vegetable shortage is way overblown. A few veggies, especially tomatoes and bell peppers, are being rationed at some grocery stores. The most stringent rationing is saying an individual can buy only three packages of each per day (per store). Many other stores aren’t rationing at all. And this shortage is supposed to last a few weeks.

It’s really not that big of a deal.

So you don’t need us in the States to send you care packages containing tomatoes, lettuce and cucumbers?

I think a temporary cake subsidy could work well to get everyone through this.

I mean, you can send me a care package if you want. I should be eating more veggies in my diet anyway. Just send it C/O Palo Verde, Edinburgh, UK. I’m sure it will get to me!

I always suspected that you might be a proponent of the Vegan Paleo diet.

Oh, that’s it. That is IT.

I no longer wish for Universal Health Care!

/s

I was watching a show a few weeks ago about moving things; this particular episode focused on a truckload of sweet potatoes bound for the UK. I was blown away to find out that the potatoes were grown and processed in the shithole little town in North Carolina where I was raised.

That sounds like a smart idea, to me.

And for what it’s worth, you can’t get tomatoes at all in the US right now. Nor for the past couple of months, nor for at least five months from now.

I see no shortage in any of the multiple different stores I visit.

Those aren’t tomatoes, just TSOs-- Tomato Shaped Objects. They look a lot like tomatoes, but can be easily distinguished by flavor. Or rather, by the complete and utter lack thereof.

They’re not true Scotsmen tomatoes.

It’s been years since I’ve been able to get tomatoes in the stores. Even the organic Tomato Shaped Objects are just tasteless red food(?) items found in the produce department.

I guess it depends on whether you’re trying to find tomaytoes or tomahtoes.

I have modest ambitions, and as an HSO I am okay with eating TSOs (preferably Camparis).

Tulsi compares Biden to Hitler.

So she’s dropping out of the race and endorsing Biden?

[ ETA, sorry, I was thinking of Nikki Haley ]

The woman who called Michele Obama an “ape in heels” and got fired for it, has been sentenced to jail for defrauding FEMA.

Here’s a version you don’t need a subscription to read:

I can’t claim to have nailed it, but I do feel like I was in the ballpark:

What’s the over/under on how long it takes before Gabbard/MTG start screaming about shape-shifting lizard people?