Old polish guy I used to work with said his village had a story. For first two years of marriage, put a bean in a jar when you have sex. After 2 yrs take one out every time. He says you will never empty the jar.
Not to be mean, but what you’ve posted of your marriage recently sounds like you’re not having a very successful one. Maybe it would be fair to say that the amount of sex and both parties’ satisfaction with that level could be used as a barometer for how well your marriage is going. What do y’all think?
gonzo, you need some new material. Eleanor already did that joke. 
Sex only stops in certain circumstances. With the bride, for example.
It depends on how much you were doing it in the first place. I’ve been with my husband for 13 years and it was pretty crazy there for the first few years but we still get it on (in some form) about every other day. The sex decreased dramatically in the six months after each child was born but has always rebounded.
Except for that one time he honked my boob. Honked it and then said, “How about some nookie?” He didn’t get any for a week after that move. :rolleyes:
Your sex life is what you make it, put effort in and you get effort back. If that’s not the case, people shouldn’t be together.
Where do you get the “you made her” bit?
Lots of wisdom in this thread. Couple things to emphasize/add.
Nothing compares to the initial infatuation stage of love. You are basically high for several months, and hot monkey sex is almost constant. But (probably because we’d starve or something if we kept on like that, and therefore never procreate) love mellows over time. Infatuation becomes intimate attachment. This will probably reduce frequency from “will you two ever sleep/work/clean/exit the house again?” but not to untoward levels. Plus when you really know and trust someone, you can experiment and do crazier stuff, while feeling safe, which is fun.
I think babies kill sex more than marriage - and only for limited times. Pregnancy brings issues, and then when their in the “fourth trimester” you get so exhausted, you feel like a POW. I think even lots of men (if they are doing their fair share!) get less interested then. Plus there’s stuff like tears/episiotomies, vaginal dryness, postpartum depression . . . there can be lots of impediments shortly after birth. And depending on when your kid learns to sleep for long stretches, it can last quite some time.
I also totally agree that dropping the courting/seduction behavior kills sex. Gee, there’s nothing that’ll turn a woman on like her man rolling over and saying, “Ya wanna?”
Finally, here is my gender psychology theory of mismatched sex interest. Obviously individuals vary, but I think this reflects the major trends. Men view sex as a relaxing treat, like plopping down in your comfy chair in front of your favorite TV show. So they can have a stressful day, feel totally exhausted, stay up until their eyelids are drooping, and then want to have sex.
For many women, sex is more like going for a run (for those that like running) - it can be relaxing, fun, and invigorating, but it requires an investment of energy, and is best done with some forethought and planning. After an exhausting day, when you are completely tapped out, and finally crawl into bed, it’s not really what you want to do.
There have been a lot of great insights in this thread, which I was expecting (one of the reasons I love the Dope so). I figured it was largely thing largely varying from couple to couple, but I did want to hear personal experiences.
It sounds to me like the friend that you quoted in your OP has a somewhat limited and old-fashioned view of women and marriage: he seems to assume that a woman will snare a man into commitment with her sexy wiles, and then turn off those wiles once she has him trapped. Women like having sex, in my experience, and assuming a long-term relationship is on a sound footing - with the loving and the cherishing and the spooning and the hand-holding and the GLAVIN! - that libido doesn’t disappear once she puts on a ring. The dynamics of the intimacy certainly do change, as a number of posters have pointed out, but that’s not a bad thing, it’s just part of maturing into an adult relationship. If your friend feels that his wife’s attitude to sex has changed, he might want to consider how he may have shaped her attitude.
Well said. Babies have put more a kibosh on sex than anything else, and one of ours has decided he doesn’t want any more little brothers, so he wants to sleep between us half the night. We’re tired, cranky, but when we do find a moment, it’s nice, comforting, and routine. Once in a blue moon, we find a few hours for mad, crazy love.