Those who have been following Ontario’s election campaign have quickly become accustomed to the governing PC party’s constant attacks on Liberal leader Dalton McGuinty. Some are true(McGuinty has no experience in government - obviously), some are debatable(McGuinty will raise taxes - actually, he’ll cancel upcoming tax breaks), some are bald-faced lies(McGuinty is against having kids in school because he won’t bar teachers from striking), and some are just bizarre(“If you truly believe what you’re saying, you need professional help.”). Indeed, I don’t even know what their platform is yet. On Friday, though, they reached the realm of the ridiculous by claiming, and I quote , “McGuinty. He’s an evil reptilian kitten-eater from another planet.” What the fuck? How the hell did these incompetent morons get elected in the first place?
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This is some sort of prank on the Tories,
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This is something prepared within the party (in-office joke?) that was accidentially released,
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The Tories have gone made (and, quite frankly, seeing as how the party barely survives on a national level, I’m not suprised.)
It was explained as “someone who might have had too much coffee”, I believe.
I LOVE this country!
It was a joke.
You have to read the press release; it’s basically an accusation against the Liberals that they’re hypocrites when they say they’re taking the high road. There follows a number of quotes of Liberals slinging mud, and then a sarcastic comment about the Liberal Party slinging mud, followed by the “reptilian kitten eater” bit. It’s obviously meant tongue in cheek, if you read it in context.
I find it surprising anyone doesn’t know what the Tories’ platform is. It’s absolutely crystal clear; they’re going to ban teacher strikes and give free money to senior citizens. I don’t agree with either position - in fact I am vehemently opposed to both - but I know what it is. On the other hand, the Liberals have done an awful job getting their platform out; the only clear thing is they won’t cut taxes, which is saying what they WON’T do, not what they will. Other than that I haven’t heard in a formal communique or advertisement of any sort what they plan to do aside from the fact that they WON’T do what Ernie wants to do.
Regrettably, it’s deja vu all over again. This is what lost them the last two elections. If you want to know how the Tories won the lasttwo times, there you have it; they had a very clearly stated position, and the Liberals did not. In a pluralistic election it makes no difference how many people disagree with you; all that matters is how many agree with you. The Tories know that angering 60% of the province is okay, because getting the other 40% wins the election running away.
However, I was quite disappointed that it was a joke. I WANT to see them get honest. Election campaigns don’t have nearly enough of this. I wanna see Howard Hampton tell Ernie Eves, in a televised debate, “Ernie, you suck donkey ass. You sound like Elmer Fudd. Nobody takes you seriously. Your mother is ugly.” And I want Eves to come back with “Bite me, socialist-boy. You have buggy eyes, too. You scare children.” That’s stuff you can really sink your teeth into.
So he says flat-out that he eats kittens, and goes even further by disclosing his love for puppies and calf. The reptilian alien bit hasn’t yet been verified, but we’ll see.
I spent most of the morning imitating Dalton and Howard’s responses.
“Oh yeah? Well, Ernie is a poopy-head! sing song voice Ernie is a poopy head! Ernie is a poopy head!”
The Globe & Mail thought it prudent to include the whole thing, which is
It seems likely that the release was prepared by someone else, and the last line was intended to provide a giggle for in-house folks who would ostensibly remove it before sending it down the line. Of course, press releases being what they are, their eyes were probably at maximum glaze by the time they got to the end, and they missed it.
I’ve never seen an Ontario Liberal up close, but 'round these parts, they’re all evil reptilian kitten-eaters from other planets, the lot of them.
And during the eighties, the (PC) premiere of Ontario was David Peterson, whom I always confused with a certain regeneration of an evil-reptilian-kitten-eater-fighting Timelord of the same era, so I’d be quite prepared to take the release at face value, if it weren’t for the PC’s being such utter bastards themselves.
Or even more likely, what Rickjay said.
Wait a minute, the evil reptilian kitten-eaters from another planet were supposed to withdraw to Australia and the Sahara and a few other places like that – I remember this clearly from Turtledove’s history books!
So what are they doing in Ontario?
Secret spy stuff. While wearing a human mask.
Band name!
Looks like your Tories are making the very same sorts of mistakes that ours in the UK did.
Looks clear to me that their voters are largely the elderly, so they are running policies that favour them to get the votes, free money, crack down on strikes, tax cuts,sounds all too familiar.
The result here is that our Tories have an ageing electorate, so old they are literally dying off, the average age of their party memebers is around 60 and increasing, there are not enough younger folk joining them.
Our Tories had a very long run in power by UK political standards, but once the demographics changed they were out(analysis of voters ages and actions show this), and it looks like they will be out for maybe a decade more.
Bide your time, they will be history soon enough.
“A Brief History of Ontario Politics”-published 2104
It makes you wonder though, how Kang and Kodos would fare in your election!
GO AHEAD!
THROW YOUR VOTE AWAY!
So Tories in Canada = Democrats in the US?
And people ask me why I’m moving to Toronto.
It’s not entirely comparable.
In Ontario, especially under the previous premier Mike Harris, the Conservatives (Tories) were pretty much the far right Republicans. No medicare, no education, no homeless shelters, no social housing, no nothing. I don’t think he actually wanted to install a theocracy, but other than that.
On the federal level, the Tories are a lot more moderate, being somewhere between Republicans and Democrats, especially since a rather further right Tory Prime Minister managed to become the least popular person in the country and reduce their seats from 169 to 2 in the election after he resigned. The main right-wing party right now is the Canadian Alliance, who are primarily a Western protest party but whom I would say fit rather neatly with the Republicans (no social programs, no gay rights, no gun control, and maybe abortions and abolishing the death penalty weren’t such hot ideas either.)
matt_mcl is being a little - well, actually, a lot - partisan. The Tories aren’t within ten miles of the Republicans, under Harris or anyone else. Ontario still has medicare, homeless shelters, education, and social services. The changes made post-1995 were not that radical. By American standards, Harris’s party was more centrist than right wing.
The Progressive Conseratives (Tories) are slightly right of center. They’re not as far right as the Republicans.
The Liberals (Grits) are dead centrist, and mostly just stand for winning elections.
The NDP are leftist, though not radically so. Unlike other parties, the federal NDP is actually connected to the provincial wings.
The Canadian Alliance (nee Reform Party, but not the U.S. “Reform Party”) is further to the right than the Tories but not as far as the Republicans. Despite matt’s comments, no, they do not support “no social programs” or “no gun control.”
You also, on a federal level, have the Bloc Quebecois, who are mainly slightly to the left but primarily exist to get Quebec out of the country.
Exact parallels are not entirely possible. NO mainstream Canadian party is as closely aligned with fundamentalist Christians as the Republicans are. The U.S. does not have a major left wing party by Canadian standards - the Democrats are centrist to us, maybe a little conservative. And Canadian parties are distinguished by issues that do not exist in the USA, and vice versa. For instance, defence policy isn’t very important in Canadian politics, but Quebec-handling policy is usually quite important.
Amusingly, there was a period, just prior to Trudeau, when the P.C.'s were slightly to the left of the Liberals – a throwaway line I used in my Short History of Canada thread was stolen from a CBC humorist (or at least he thought he was): “the Progressive Conservatives, who are liberal, and the Liberals, who are conservative…”
I take it that you’re talking about the Diefenbaker era, when Diefenbaker nearly won an election by fighting nuclear weapons, as opposed to the (pro-nukes) Liberal candidate, Pearson.