Oompa Loompas vs Munchkins

The Oompa Loompas would kick some serious Munchkin ass. The Munchkins are happy cutesy wimps. The Oompa Loompas turn children into mutants and shove them down chocolate aqua-ducts.

Plus, the Oompa Loompas are scarier, and as someone said, they don’t smile. You don’t fuck with the Oompa Loompas. If they had been in Oz, the Wicked Witches would’ve been toast. Or rather giant blueberries.


There’s a Gary Coleman joke in here somewhere.

Please fill us in about the Grunka Lunkas.

Grunka Lunkas are Oompa Loompa knock-offs from an episode of Futurama.

D-Armed Guards…

Unfortunately I could see the Grunka Lunkas losing to the munchkins. They were conned into slave labor, after all.

Oompa Loopas, though? Pft. They’d round the munchkins up into a giant meat grinder while singing a vaguely sadistic song with big neon letters.

In the episode of Futurama, I should point out, Fry wins a contest sponsored by Slurm (the highly addictive soft drink of the future - a delivery truck can be seen during the opening theme) and gets to tour the Slurm factory, which is a direct copy of Willy Wonka’s.

Except, of course, there’s a deep dark secret…

If it was a dance off then I’d say it’d be all Munchkin.

If it was a sing off then I’d think the Munchkins would take it again.

But for butt kicking I’d have to give it to the Oompa Loompas. Something tells me they fight dirty. Eye gouging, crotch kicking, hair pulling. The whole shebang.

“Grunka Lunka Dunkity Doo,
we’ve got a friendly warning for you.
Grunka Lunka Dunkity Dasis,
the secret of Slurm’s on a need-to-know basis.”

“Grunka Lunka Dunkity Dingredient,
you should not ask about the secret ingredient.”
…Tell them I hate them!
I wouldn’t give the sing and dance off to the Munchkins that quickly. If your into grunge or goth, the Oompas rock out. Their choreography seemed a little more involved than the mincing and prancing the Munchkins did.

Oompa Loompas rule!

Oompas. Hands Down. And man would it get ugly. As much as they respect Mr. Wonka for saving them, they still paid a pretty high price for it. They’re essentially unpaid slaves working for the man. Tragically torn away from their ancestral homelands, you don’t think they’ve got some untapped rage issues?

Munchkins? Please what do they have to compain about? The yellow brick road looks a little too dandelion in this light?

What about Oompas v. Ewoks?

The Grunka-Lunkas are tough and cynical and a little like the Teamsters, except their union is riddled with corruption and the rank-and-file workers are viewed with contempt and…

Actually, they’re exactly like the Teamsters.

The Munchkins appear to be happy, friendly people in a happy, friendly town. The Oompa-Loompas are happy-seeming employees. I imagine the OLs are treated harshly by Mr. Wonka, and would be good little fighters-it’s a way to get out all their rage.

Speaking of parodies, if you’re ever in Quahog, RI, visit the Pawtucket Patriot brewery. They have some Oompa-Loompas as well. And there’s at least one at the Motherloving Sugar Company in Springfield…I can’t read the state. The bottom corner of the page is ripped off.

Whatchoo talkin’ 'bout, Wonka?

Oompa, loompa, dippity doo
I’ve got another puzzle for you
Oompa, loompa, dippety dee
If you are wise you’ll listen to me

What do you get when we fight the Munchkins?
The sorriest mess since Billie Jean beat Bobbie Riggs!
Why would some of you bet on the Oz midgets?
When we’ll rework them into candy-assed widgets!

Do you doubt the seriousness of my scary orange glare?

Oompa, Loompa, dippity doo,
I’ve got a line on a slamdown near you.
Oompa, Loompa, dippety dee
If you are wise you’ll put your money on me.

The lines in your poem have way too many syllables.

Oompa Loompas get my vote.

When debating the merits of Loompa- and Munchkin-ism,
To quibble on points of lyrical scansion;
Is akin to dismissing Star Wars/Star Trek for unrealism,
For their ubiquitous English diction.

Hah! :smiley: I can’t believe no one else got this joke.

(For those of you not in the know about this particular definition of “munchkin,” take a look at the following now-famous list: http://www.ai.mit.edu/people/ringrose/munchkin.html.)

(… and this one: http://www.roisaber.sphosting.com/gaming/munchkins.html.)

(… er, forget the link I just posted immediately above. What you really need to read is this: http://meandhim.tripod.com/munch.htm.)

It will make sense if you say them faster