I remember one for a phone company. I have no idea what the name of the fake company was. David Spade was the spokesperson. It had exchanges like this:
Customer: Can my phone number be “123-4567?”
DS: Sure!
2nd Customer: Can my phone number also be “123-4567”?
DS: Well, I don’t think…
2nd C: Please?
DS: Sure, whatever.
And then:
Customer: Will you kill my boss?
DS: NO! No murder!
Customer: I want you to kill my boss!
DS: Fine, we will kill your boss.
And then:
Little Girl: Can I have a pony?
DS: Yes, we will buy you a pony.
Man, I love that commercial!
Uncle Jemima’s Grain Alcohol “You might know my wife, Aunt Jemima…” It’s Tracy Morgan playing Uncle Jemima while little zippedy-doo-dah birds fly around his head. Aunt Jemima comes out on the porch and says something like “Are you drinkin again?” and he yells, “Shut up, woman, don’t ruin this for me!!” It is just hilarious!!
I love that one! Uncle Jemima’s Mash Liquor! Whenever they show the bottle they’ve always got those animated butterflys and birds coming out, then when Uncle Jemima start swinging at them, his buddy (Tim Meadows) says “Da hell you swattin at?!” Still makes me laugh.
The robot insurance ad is great too. “Everyone knows robots need to eat old people’s medicine for fuel.”
Another classic Phil Hartman commercial parody was an ad for “Monster-be-Gone” spray targeted at children… Sort of like extra-strength mace for the monsters under your bed and in your closet - only $50 per bottle.
There was a 70’s era commercial for a new car for people living in poor neighborhoods. It looked like a junker on the outside, but inside it featured “fine corinthian leather”.
Remember when pump-up sneakers were all the rage? Chris Rock did a rap-style commercial for pump-up Thanksgiving turkeys for poor people. “Just Puuuuuump It! Pump it uP!”
How about the Lung Brush, with Chris Farley. Remove that tobacco tar with a giant Q-Tip!
Great stuff.
My all-time favorites have already been mentioned:
I just saw one yesterday for a Democratic nominee for Senate, played by Will Ferrell. He was nominated because he had his genitals burned off in a fire and therefore can’t have a sex scandal:
“Vote for me. I have no genitals. I CAN’T cheat on my wife. The thought of sex gives me phantom pains where my genitals used to be.”
Oh yeah, that was a great one…and the names just kept getting worse and worse. “With a name like Mangled Baby Ducks, you KNOW our jelly has to be good!” And the final name was so bad it couldn’t be read on the air, the other spokesmen just read it and puked…hehehe
From the 70s…
** Meatwagon!!** Slot cars that burst into flames on impact. The meatwagon was the ambulance that rushed to the scene. A mini jaws-of-life pried off the doors and little crispy drivers tumbled out of the car.
Also… ** Puppy Uppers** and ** Doggie Downers**
The K-tel compilation record parody ** Gansta Rap’s Greatest Love Songs** featuring the hit “My Bitch Ain’t No 'Ho”
A really, really obscure onehtta I have to encounter being known by anyone else was a Eddie Murphy doing Elmer Fudd-light commercial (actually a long skit) for a the Mayonnaise house. Done in a Carvel Ice-cream style I guess.
“Matahorn Mayo! A vewitable Mouwntain of mayonaise! Comes with flag and three plastic goats!”
Nobody I know of remembers that one.
One favorite not mentioned with the Philaldephia action figures. That’s right the movie Philadelphia, complete with kid yelling “Philadelphia” a la Sega at the end.
Jeez, this is like my fourth post in this thread, but I just keep remembering new ones…
This was circa 1983. The ad was for a lung cleaner for smokers that came in a spray bottle with a pump. The funniest part of the commercial was when Eddie Murphy and (I think) Tim Kazurinsky were dressed in lab coats, smoking, and holding the product. They would chant “The pump…the pump…the pump!” spraying all the while, and they kept spraying one another while looking straight at the camera. They were struggling to keep their faces straight while they spritzed each other with powerful streams from “the pump…the pump!”
[li]Shirt in a Can! Tim Meadows is eating a snack, and it falls on his shirt, staining it. I love the way he says, “DAMNIT!” And the way the announcer trades lines with him as he’s spraying the ultra fake looking shirt on, “Do you work out?” “Sometimes,” “It shows.” :)[/li]
[li]The one for rat poision, with Will Ferrell. Unfortunately, said product features a large picture of the creator’s dog on it, and a tiny picture of a rat. And of course, the product looks like big tantalizingly chunks of dog food, plus it’s strong enough to take down creatures much larger than rats. (I.e., dogs.) It says “Rat Poison” in tiny tiny print.[/li]
Colon Blow was also great, I loved Phil Hartman guessing. “Seven?” “We’ll give you one more guess.” “Eight.”
Love the robot thing, too. Can we nominate South Park commercials? Nothing like Cherokee hair tampons to block up the flow, or “I Love Towellie” shirts.
It’s for this really bad mailing company.
Basically, if you forgot to mail something (birthday gift, package for work, etc.), you send it through this company, and even though it was your fault for sending it in late, the company takes the blame. Hehe. I really thought this was a clever one…well, for people who like to procrastinate.
The funniest part of the Adobe commercial was the jingle: “Hey, hey, we’re adobe…Adobe!”
A couple older ones I always liked:
“Sold Out Gold” a Ktel type album full of songs that were made into commercial jingles (both real and made up), such as “Good Vibrations (the Sunkist Song)” and “Talkin’ 'bout my Ken-L-Ration.” The “spokesman” was Jon Lovitz made up to look like David Crosby and he was all bug-eyed and reeling and saying “order now, Maaaaaaaaan!”
Another one was more a spoof than a funny product, it had John McEnroe and Stevie Wonder advertising for Nikon high speed cameras. First they had John McEnroe hitting balls and Wonder taking the pictures, except they were all nowhere near where McEnroe was hitting the balls, then they had Stevie Wonder hitting balls and McEnroe taking pictures, except Wonder was just flailing the racket around and not even coming close to hitting the balls. The tagline was “The camera so simple – even Stevie Wonder can use it!”
I just remembered another - Mike Myers as the guy from the Infiniti commercials selling the new Infiniti toilet. “Tell them you already know the part about the ca-ca.”
The “company” was Jiffy, I think. And the tag line was something like, “When you’ve got to get it there tomorrow, go to the other guys. When it had to be there yesterday, call us.”
Another one I thought of was for Hibernol. It was a spoof on Nyquil[sub]TM[/sub]. It had Chris Farley coming down with the flu. His wife gives him some Hibernol, and he drinks this huge medicine cup full of it. Then he falls asleep for the whole winter. He wakes up the following spring with a waist-length beard and proclaims that he feels healthy. That was a really funny one.
