Opal, what the fuck is your problem?

[supergoose]

@Max_Torque

I hadn’t wanted to get involved in this, but this one’s just nagging at me: why is it a “scooped out eyeball”? Why must this object which bears a resemblance to another object be a “dismembered deer’s optical organ”? Mightn’t it be called a “buckeye” because it somewhat resembles the keen, gentle eye of a lovely living deer?

Because if you look at it and see a deer’s eye, clearly, it’s a dismembered deer’s eye, or else there be a deer surrounding it. And given that deer don’t shed their eyes, it must have been removed, either violently or when the deer was dead. It can’t resemble the eye of a lovely living deer if there’s no living deer attached to it. YMMV, obviously, but I often can’t note an object’s resemblance to something without also instantly understanding the circumstances surrounding it actually being what it resembles.

[the_Lady]

@Southern_Yankee

I find it goes away if you imagine popping each delicious little worm out.

Alas, not for me. I tried that.

[Chessic_Sense]

@Scissorjack

No-eye deer.

Ha! Nice. Liked it. Stolen for personal gain.

@bbs2k

From henceforth I declare that Lady Fingers should be renamed Cookie Biscuit Thingys, so no one confuses me with a cannibal. And make sure you check food labels to insure that your Freedom Fries were made in America.

I hate Lady Fingers. You know why? No joke, it’s because the name is absolutely disgusting. I make no apologies or it.

Opal is totally in the right here. That thread goes:

1. Anyone know a recipe for candy?
2. Here you go. But since you’re on my turf, you have to call them Pig Turds.
3. I’m not calling them that because 1- Eww and 2- I’m not from here.
   4. Bitch
4. Huh? It’s a gross name!
5. Um, hello?! It’s named after a plant that’s named after animal fecal matter, not the fecal matter itself!
6. Why would I call the candy by an unappetizing name?
   8-rest. But it’s just a plant!!

And you guys think Opal’s the retarded one here? Post 4 crosses the absurd, rude line and Opal just responded rationally to that. Everone else just missed the point that the name is gross to her (and to me) by piling on that if the name passes from animal organ to plant nut to food, it’s somehow not gross anymore.

Go Opal. Dio, you’re an idiot (about this).

[Hazle_Weatherfield]

@supergoose

Because if you look at it and see a deer’s eye, clearly, it’s a dismembered deer’s eye, or else there be a deer surrounding it. And given that deer don’t shed their eyes, it must have been removed, either violently or when the deer was dead. It can’t resemble the eye of a lovely living deer if there’s no living deer attached to it. YMMV, obviously, but I often can’t note an object’s resemblance to something without also instantly understanding the circumstances surrounding it actually being what it resembles.

That would be a really big piece of candy!

[Diogenes_the_Cynic]

@Chessic_Sense

Ha! Nice. Liked it. Stolen for personal gain.

I hate Lady Fingers. You know why? No joke, it’s because the name is absolutely disgusting. I make no apologies or it.

Opal is totally in the right here. That thread goes:

1. Anyone know a recipe for candy?
2. Here you go. But since you’re on my turf, you have to call them Pig Turds.
3. I’m not calling them that because 1- Eww and 2- I’m not from here.
   4. Bitch
4. Huh? It’s a gross name!
5. Um, hello?! It’s named after a plant that’s named after animal fecal matter, not the fecal matter itself!
6. Why would I call the candy by an unappetizing name?
   8-rest. But it’s just a plant!!

And you guys think Opal’s the retarded one here? Post 4 crosses the absurd, rude line and Opal just responded rationally to that. Everone else just missed the point that the name is gross to her (and to me) by piling on that if the name passes from animal organ to plant nut to food, it’s somehow not gross anymore.

Go Opal. Dio, you’re an idiot (about this).

Number 2 on your list is a complete fabrication.

[mhendo]

@Chessic_Sense

And you guys think Opal’s the retarded one here?

Well, to be fair, you’re providing some very close competition.

[wring]

@Chessic_Sense

.

Opal is totally in the right here. That thread goes:

1. Anyone know a recipe for candy?
2. Here you go. But since you’re on my turf, you have to call them Pig Turds.

How the fuck do you get that? I saw it as a completly friendly remark, which she then stomped on.
[/QUOTE]

[Heffalump_and_Roo]

@Frank

Sold! Except I don’t see any reason for the pasta. Perhaps some Jello instead.

Exactly what I was thinking. But when you replace the pasta with the jello, you get
Ambrosia fruit salad, a much nicer name. . . but I’m not even going there.

[Amber_in_Treasury]

@ZipperJJ

Opal: I need this thing.
Doper: How about this? Or this?
Opal: head spins around
Other Doper: How about this?
Opal: spits pea soup

Bwahahahahahaha! Thank you, Zipper.

[eleanorigby]

@Frylock

That was the joke.

-FrL-

Ha. Ha.

@Frylock

To my recollection, I have never asked anyone for an apology, I don’t think I ever would ask for one, and find it annoying and irrelevant when they are offered to me. I accept them in order to “be polite” but feel almost as dirty doing so as when I offer an apology myself. It’s a game I don’t understand the rationale for. I don’t care if you say you’re sorry, and I don’t understand why you care if I say it. It’s a phrase I could say with equal effect regardless of actual intentions, and is for that reason perfectly meaningless.

Duly noted–an apology from you is meaningless and facile. (and I don’t believe you’ve never asked anyone in your life, EVER, for an apology. Seriously–that is something.) I didn’t say you asked for an apology or offered one (except for your “joke”).
IMO you were fairly forceful in your own opinion re the uselessness of apologies. Kudos to you for being honest. But with that is the issue that your apologies will now be seen as false.

This is why we say please and thank you and I’m sorry to other people. Sure, there’s a chance the speaker doesn’t really mean it, but there’s a chance s/he does. There is such a thing as being too forthright in conversation and social interactions. You end up offending people for no good reason. Just sayin’.

[descamisado]

@Justin_Bailey

Damn, you’re right. I’ve always confused the two of them and now it appears to have bitten me in the ass.

You had to go and bring up dingleberry tarts – thanks a lot!

[Cat_Whisperer]

@Vinyl Turnip

You shut up!

@Bryan_Ekers

I fucked your mom!

At last - the day I’ve been living for! A Vinyl Turnip/Bryan Ekers snarkfight! FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!

[Koxinga]

I’m only on page 4 and have to get back to work, but wanted to say that so far this is the funniest SDMB thread I’ve seen in a while.

[timbicile59]

note to self: never mention animal crackers around Opal

[Morgenstern]

@Bryan_Ekers

I fucked your mom!

The guys at the mortuary keep complaining about the mess.

[Kobal2]

@Guinastasia

For what it’s worth, a wiki search shows that “buckeye” doesn’t even mention dead deer eyes.

(I remember my friends and I collecting the tree nuts when I was six. And then maggots getting into the box I had them in. :0)

It’s early and I’m afraid I’m forgetful here-refresh my memory?

Curse you for making me plod through all the nonsense to figure out whether you’d had an answer or not.

We call them “Bear cubs” or a variation thereof, because most candymakers do make them in the shape of cute lil’ bears. There’s some debate over whether one should eat them feet first or head first.

[Cat_Whisperer]

I remembered what else I wanted to say - any other poster would have gotten their asses handed to them a long time ago acting like Opal has been acting when she asks for advice. It is her repuation/status/whatever you want to call it here that let her get away with it with relative impunity for so long.

[Don_t_fight_the_hypothetical]

@mhendo

Well, to be fair, you’re providing some very close competition.

Ha!

[Nzinga_Seated]

@TommyTutone

We need to update the listing methodology:

1. You are all being too hard on her
2. She is appropriately sensitive about the topic
3. Lick my hairy nutsack you crazy ass bitch
4. She has every right to her feelings

This thread has been pure- d- comedy. But this post here shall NOT be lost in the shuffle. Oh no…because Lick my hairy nutsack you crazy ass bitch MUST be the new number three on all lists on the SDMB, for my laughing pleasure. Please. I hardly ever ask you folks for anything!

[Darryl_Lict]

There’s a taco stand in town that serves eyeball (ojos) tacos. I’ve been trying to psyche up to eat one. I’m a little afraid of mad cow disease, but I think I’ll man up just for the purposes of this thread.