Same here.
Amen.
I mentioned this in another thread, but I absolutely despise the pandering, cliche-ridden, wholly predictable, thoroughly unoriginal travesty that’s known as Billy Elliot. Jamie Bell’s absolutely terrific, but it doesn’t change how horrible the movie is.
Far too many. Just a sampling:
Lord of the Rings
Harry Potter
The Matrix, parts 2 and 3 (the first one was ok, but just).
Spider Man 2 (not that I hated it, but just thought it was a snooze. Roger Ebert calls it the best super hero movie ever made. He must have seen something different than what I saw, which had very little "super hero"ness in it at all).
Pulp Fiction (to my dying day, this will almost certainly be the worst movie I’ve ever seen).
Citizen Kane (best movie ever made? Perhaps it deserves “best movie ever made at the time it was released”. But in the, sixty-plus years that have followed, there hasn’t been a single movie that’s better?)
Shakespeare in Love (omigod, what a total waste of two hours of my life!)
Forrest Gump (everyone dies! Everyone he ever had any attachment to, except for one person, is dead by the end of the movie! I’m still the only person on Earth who has noticed that!)
Unforgiven (Plot? We don’t need no stinkin’ plot, just a whole lot of guns, blood, and dead people.)
Saving Private Ryan (To prove that I’m no prude when it comes to blood and gore, I thought that the first 30 minutes of this movie were excellent; realistic, moving, frightening, etc. The middle was just one big cliche. But the last 30 minutes were a blood and cliche filled cartoon, and made the entire rest of the movie into a joke!)
The Sixth Sense (Again, just boring.)
L.A. Confidential (Every single person in that movie had no redeeming values whatsoever. A movie about a bunch of moral-less, ethics-less people, who could care what happens to them?)
American Idol
NYPD Blue
The Apprentice
MIchael Jackson
Adam Sandler
Billy Crystal as host of the Oscars
To answer RancidYakButterTeaParty’s question about Pulp Fiction (even though it wasn’t asked of me): What didn’t I like? Everything. Absolutely everything. I found nothing in that movie funny or interesting or worth watching or listening to. If it wasn’t dumb, it was boring. If it wasn’t boring, it was nonsensical. If it wasn’t nonsensical, it was gross for no apparent reason. Take its most famous scene. Two guys in a car talking about what they call a Big Mac in France. That sound you hear is me snoring. Oh, I get it. Not just two guys, but two hitmen in a car talking about what they call a Big Mac in France. And they’re on their way to a hit. <zzzzzzz> What’s funny about it? Just don’t get it. And you can put three on your list: My wife hated it even more than I did. I will never never in my life see anything that has Tarentino’s name attached to it, and that includes the upcoming CSI episode.
Steven Spielberg’s movies. Notice I didn’t say “Steven Spielberg” – the man definitely wins the award for “Best Director Whose Movies I Near-Uniformly Dislike”. He clearly has the skill required to transfer his imagination onto film, which is the hallmark of a good director.
Runner up for that award goes to Mr. Stanley Kubrick, whose “2001: A Space Odyssey” stands as the most unconscionably boring movie I do like.
(Side note: small wonder I didn’t care for “A.I.”, isn’t it?)
Stupid doofy comedies. I refer here to the subgenre that would include Adam Sandler movies, Dumb & Dumber, Kangaroo Jack, Scary Movie, Stuck On You, White Chicks, the more recent National Lampoon movies, etc. The only one of these I’ve ever liked was the original “American Pie”.
I’ll second the Pink Floyd comment.
Bob Dylan, and not just because of his total lack of singing ability.
and of course…
…
…
…
…naaaaaah. 
I agree. I thought it was a complete waste of time.
I want to second Dune. I picked this up because it was supposed to be this great classic sci-fi novel, right? Wrong. It was boring, tedious, and predictable. I got to the end of it, and all I could think was, “Melanie Rawn did a waaayyy better job with the whole coming-to-love-the-desert-and-saving-it-from-those-who-would-destroy-it thing.”
Ditto on those godsawful sophomoric “comedies.” There’s Something About Mary, Meet the Parents, etc, etc, just set my teeth on edge. Just thinking about them makes me cringe.
Ecchhhh. You’re not alone. I loved the book and was bewildered by the movie when I finally saw it as an adult (fortunately. It would have traumatized me as a kid.) Roald Dahl’s Wonka comes off as blissfully, eccentrically unaware of the potential dangers to his guests. Gene Wilder’s Wonka is mean and snarky and almost relishes each accident as it occurs. He comes across as actively disliking his guests, as if the tour is a burdensome obligation rather than something he wanted to do.
I’m hoping the upcoming Johnny Depp version is a closer adaptation. Depp is too young and too much a hottie for the part, but at least he seems to “get it.”
YES!!! I’m not the only one! I can stomach it, but unless I’m at a friends house I don’t go near it.
I’m also glad to see that I’m not the only one who doesn’t like 2001. Eye candy, that’s all it is. And boring as hell. I also used to think I was the only one who didn’t like Ghost in the Shell (first movie). Then I came here, and found others like me. Yay!
What about Shaun Majunder? That boy hasn’t been funny in years. And then they made him host of Just for Laughs for a season. Ruins an otherwise good show for me. To make matters worse, he’s now on This Hour has 22 minutes. On the upside, that’s pretty close to his own flavour of ‘comedy’, so maybe it’s not all bad–it’ll keep him out of trouble.
LOTR
Kubrick
What? As I said previously, I just finished the book last night and this is totally at odds with how I read Wonka. Granted, Dahl’s Wonka isn’t as bad as Wilder’s but it’s not a complete reinvention of his character and even laughed and joked about the children’s fates.
In addition, he was obviously contemptuous of Mike Teavee the entire time.
South Park. This is mostly because I’m apparently middle-aged, and I can’t understand what they are saying. And they yell too much. The whole thing is just loud and meaningless to me. Watching it is like watching abstract art, presented in another language.
Seinfeld. I will never understand what people see in this show. I know people who say “I love it because I know people just like those characters!” If I ever know anyone even remotely like those characters, take me out back and shoot me. I spend a good deal of time trying to avoid people like that. Why would I want to watch them on TV?
E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial. Stupid, not cute, not interesting.
The Piano. Just annoying. (Except for Holly’s brief nude scene, unfortunately ruined by Keitel’s being nude, too.)
Man, I’m glad I’m not the only one to despise Seinfeld. People are always talking about how great it was, and I found it to be as entertaining as a bus crash. Less, really. Then again, most of what is on prime time TV and passes for comedy is dreck-give me a root canal and I’ll laugh more.
I’ll freely admit that I love Homestar Runner, though.
…you just put exactly in words the vague “fuck that movie, it’s creepy” I get when I think about it. the book was a joy… the movie, no. no. no.
Anything that has ever been on, or will ever be on, the Lifetime network. And any of those TV "court"shows…I just feel like reaching into my TV and smacking those whiney Jerry Springer rejects senseless.
I’ll second The Matrix, Forrest Gump, Spiderman 2, and LOTR. I’ll add Fight Club, which I thought started out decent and then just became ridiculous and unbelievable. Star Wars, which I thought was great when I was seven, bores the shit out of me whenever I see it now. Radiohead, who get talked up as being the most innovative band in decades, sound just like Pink Floyd to me - only with worse vocals, if that’s possible. Jimi Hendrix, who I’m sure was a great guitar player, but he was certainly not a great singer or songwriter, and all his songs sound muddy and sloppy to me. MASH** (the TV show), which I never found either funny or poignant, just heavy-handed and sentimental. And much more that I’ll think of later.
I think Nirvana is only popular anymore because Kurt Cobain comitted suicide. The band sounds exactly the same as every other metal band, or whatever the genre was. I can’t stand them.
I also hated the move A Clockwork Orange. It is the worst supposedly good movie I have ever seen.
I can’t stand nearly all rap music. Notice “nearly”. There are a few good songs. Very few.
Most Disney movies stink.
I hated Pulp Fiction. I was dragged to a midnight screening of it back before Xmas, and assured I’d like it. It had a few points where I laughed, but by about 2/3rds the way through i really wanted to just go home.
I hated E.T.. My mom took me to see it as a little kid, and I still remember being traumatized by that… thing… as it was dying, and kind of turned solid white, and all the men in the suits and ugh… I don’t understand what people like about that creepy ass movie.
The Matrix and Star Wars. I don’t get why these are so popular. I mean, I understand how they were popular at the time… but it mystifies me how they stay so popular. I’ve only seen SW once when they were re-released in '98 or so, and I saw the first Matrix and didn’t bother to see the sequels (or SW prequels.) I guess SW is just riding on the devotion from fans who loved it when they were kids. Or kids today that maybe like that. It has no appeal to me being in neither group.
I love Pink Floyd, but I never listen to the (music) radio anymore since I don’t drive, so I haven’t been over-exposed to it. I can see how it would get annoying.
All music released since 1990.
That one is probably just me.
“Meh?” 'Tis sacrilege! 