Oprah! I didn't know you had it in you.

Just a few moments ago I was flipping channels on the T.V. and happened upon a little clip of the Oprah show (I wasn’t watching it, I swear. It’s just that I don’t have cable and it’s 1:30AM, so there’s really very little content on in the first place)

Oprah says, “Coming up - the one thing women give to others but they can not give to themselves.” and it cuts to commercial.

My immediate thought was “Blowjobs?”

I don’t have anyone else to share this spectacular wit with, so I’m posting it here. Yes, I know I’m a sick dirty man. Any other ideas?

When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.

Quite true… I knew a guy once who was just a font of prime “That’s what she said!” material without meaning to be (that is, he said the material, I came back with “That’s what she said”… but his personality was such that it was fun getting a reaction, and it never got old)

Oprah’s like a fortune cookie: you’re supposed to add “in bed” to the end of everything she says.

It could turn out to be BJs. I remember a few years ago Howard Stern tried to read on his radio program an exact transcript from a recent Oprah show and couldn’t get three words spoken at a stretch without getting censored.

My phrase for these circumstances is “…much like certain ex-boyfriends.”

My dad says this all the time and it always cracks me up.

Is that you Tom?