“What are you planning to do with your life? When are you going to start a real career?”
Actually, they don’t even ask – they just skip straight to giving me advice: I should apply for this job, I should talk to this person, I should think about this route, I should look into this program, etc.
And they all mean so well and are so eager to help that you can’t do anything but smile weakly and pretend like you’re listening. :mad:
Because, you see, if I quit my job, I’d have more time. What could I do with that time? I could snare me a husband! (I suppose I’d have to; how else would I make my mortgage if I’m not working?) The fact that I like my job and don’t currently want to snare a husband apparently are irrelevant; my extended family does believe I’m a bit unnatural for liking my life the way it is.
There have been some good answers to the baby question over in the when are you getting married thread. Check 'em out.
I shared some of my comments over there, but then I am a snarky ol’ bastid and just would say stuff like that. The icy stare and “I beg your pardon?” “Why do you need to know?” replies are, IMHO, the best answers for all rude questions.
Especially the ones that are asking you if you were aware that you are fat. “Did you know you gained a lot of weight?” Why, no, thanks for pointing it out, I wouldn’t have been able to come up with that on my own. Since I am apparently both fat and stupid.
Questions that pertain to us (me, my husband and our kids) coming to another relative’s house next year for whatever holiday.
See, husband and I are planning to separate (loooong story)–so I will have to lie and smile and nod agreement instead of leaping onto the table and crowing, “this is the last Thanksgiving I ever have to spend with your sorry ass!”
Frankly, the temptation to do the above is great indeed…
And the converse: “I can’t believe you’re so skinny! Look how skinny davenport is! I wish I was that skinny, what’s your secret?” I lost fifty pounds a year ago through no fault or trying of my own, and from the way my family reacted, you’d think I split the atom. And apparently, skinny people are expected to be just as jolly as fat people; whenever I talked about things going wrong in my life, or anything negative, they countered with “what do you have to be depressed about, you’re SKINNY!” My parents still use that line on me whenever I’m being negative.
Not that I’m comparing the “disadvantages” of losing weight with the disadvantages of gaining it. But it’s something that pissed me off last year, and I expect it to happen again.
The best response to rude questions is to stare with your mouth open, like you are about to speak. But don’t, and don’t turn away. If they look away first or change the subject, you’ve won. If they repeat or come up with another touchy question, just hold the pose. If you can master this, you will never be troubled by rude questions again.
LOL. Due to both trying AND being very sick, I have lost a net of 80lbs. Everyone who sees me says “You look so good.” I always think “Yeah, almost dieing will do that for you…” But people mean well when the say it and I guess I don’t really mind.