I am aware that the Netherlands has had racial conflict just like all other countries have - but I can definitely see why a birthmom might think their black or biracial child would have an easier life there.
It is also interesting that the American system is also relatively gay friendly compared to other countries that allow foreigners to adopt:
In America, there has been a lot of struggle over the issue of interracial adoption, with some people fighting against the idea of kids being raised by parents of another race. Personally, though, I consider it great news whenever a kid ends up in a decent home with non-abusive parents, regardless of each party’s skin color.
She’s wrong in her assessment of black people. While there are definitely those who hate on biracial peeps, it’s nowhere close to “majority”. And if a biracial baby were adopted by a black family (as my parents did with my own brother), then he’d likely have little of the baggage that comes with being biracial. He’d just be yet another light-skinned black person.
If I were that mother, I’d be more worried about raising a child whose mother is a crack-addicted prostitute with a prison record than I would be about racial discrimination. That is a big impediment to overcome no matter what the kid looks like. I didn’t read the article, but I hope she’s got her life turned around. For her daughter’s sake, at least.
Susan has no idea what she’s talking about, which is probably not unusual coming from crack-addicted prostitute felons.
Also, those countries don’t have the same racial hangups that we do, but a black kid probably being raised in an almost entirely white environment, including their family, isn’t going to have any racial issues? My sister has a black/white friend (not even adopted, so his whole family wasn’t white) who was raised in Holland, actually, and he disagrees.
I have no problem with qualified people in other countries adopting American kids, but not for these stupid reasons.
I am very liberal but I was more than a little offended at listening to a crack addict whine about how racist Americans are and how we are the ones who would screw up her poor kid.
Why not? Sure, it seems odd to hear about American kids getting “adopted out” to a foreign country. But a loving home is a loving home, and truthfully the AA kids in the foster systems do get the short end of the stick here sometimes.
They take longer on average to place, and sometimes spend too many of their formative years with instability. If this birthmom thought she saw a shortcut to putting her kid in a better-than-average situation, more power to her.
Her daughter is also quite racist for an 11-year-old. (Way to throw your own kid under the bus, lady!)
You gotta wonder just how that happened. Now maybe someone who’d have sex with a black dude can’t be all that racist (smirk). But surely an 11-year-old that would call a baby a “nigger” didn’t come to that attitude all on her own. Mama or someone real close to Mama put that in her head.
True, she probably feels like this is the one thing she can do for him. Because she’s an idiot, the reasoning behind her thoughtful decision actually makes no sense, but oh well, the outcome will still be fine most likely.
Probably mostly first- or second-generation immigrants? I doubt a kid raised in the Netherlands in a Dutch family is going to identify with them all that much. Recent immigrants tend to form their own communities (not ALWAYS, and I don’t know about the Netherlands but I’m just guessing). A black kid adopted into a white mainstream Dutch family is probably going to be raised in a mostly white environment, don’t you think? Especially because the kid was born in the U.S., so white Dutch parents wouldn’t even have resources like a Surinamese community center like they would if they adopted a kid from Surinam.
Anyway, like I said I don’t even have a problem with it because things aren’t going to be perfect anywhere. But it’s stupid to think you have to rule out American families because in crackhead land everyone here apparently hates biracial people.
I’m not talking about Europe in general, it’s a big place. Some countries in Europe are overwhelmingly white, with the nonwhites being mostly immigrants in insular communities. Some parts of the U.S. are like that too, but I wouldn’t raise a black kid in that environment either, especially not *because *of racial reasons.
Most Dutch speaking blacks in the Netherlands are assumed to be Surinams, and those are fully integrated third-generation immigrants from a Dutch speaking, Dutch cultured colony. So yes, integrated.
There are a couple of groups of more recent black immigrants that have more integration problems, but theit numbers are small enough not to make a blip on most racist-leaning people.
Currently, our Dutch racists are so hung up on Muslims and Arabs, that, for the time being, they totally forgot about being racist and hostile to blacks. (It helps that half our star soccer players are black).
Quite often, they even say: " I’m not racist, I’ve got nothing against blacks. But those towel heads…"
And there is a considerable part of the Dutch who think black children, especially mixed ones and especially pretty ones, are stunningly beautiful. If you look at kids models advertisements aimed at kids and parents (for toys, clothing, etc) a large percentage (larger then in the population in general) is black/mixed. Well integrated kids of mixed race are considered cool here.
The quote doesn’t even really make sense- obviously Dutch law allows same sex couples to adopt, or how would they be placing kids with Dutch gay couples…?
I’m pretty sure that in countries where same-sex couples aren’t allowed to adopt, they don’t just go “Oh, well that’s an American kid- that’s fine. Here, have a visa”.
I took that quote to mean that the US is the only country that has a large number of children available to adopt, that is open to foreign couples, and also allows gay to adopt those children. I’m not saying that’s factually true but that’s how I read it. I’m assuming that part of the reason these families are coming to the US is that there just isn’t a large number of infants/preschool-age kids available to adopt in their own country – I’m sure there are some but maybe wait times are so long that going to the US starts to become an attractive option.
Aside: as an Indian growing up in a lily-white part of the UK, it’s not a stretch to say that Ruud Gullit, John Barnes and Daley Thompson were basically the only people I saw who looked like me (other than family). Gullit helped me get through a few difficult years just by existing.
Yeah, the problem is that most adoptee-producing countries are also not open to letting gay couples adopt, and conversely most gay-friendly countries do not produce adoptees for stranger-adoptions.
I read the linked CNN article and I think it paints an accurate picture.
Due to our very low number of unwanted pregnancies, (more girls on birth control) we hardly have any Dutch babies up for adoption. And we do have as many couples looking to adopt as the US does. And for the Dutch, America is as “cool” as “Europe” is to US birth moms. And the Dutch speak English, know American culture and that lets them choose that country and makes them willing and able to let their kid share her/his birth culture. And I suppose many cultural values of Dutch culture are similar, to and appealing to, US birth moms. Apart from the not-very-religious part, maybe.