Ow, My Hangover, Or How We Became Catholic: An MMP

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
361

Defense Attorney:
Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady:
I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring
evening,
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?

Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?

Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady:
No, I didn’t stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady:
No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven’t felt that good in
years!

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
Well, by then, I was feeling so “spicy” that I just laid down and told him
“Take me, young man. Take me now!”

Defense Attorney:
Did he take you?

Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, “April Fool!” And that’s when I shot him, the
little bastard.

362

I made it through work. It just rained at work, so I don’t know if anything in Raleigh got hit, bobbio. I am watching the Ducks/Wild game(hi taxi!)

Yay for a rosie MMP!

BooFae, if you do whack 'im indoors(is there an 'im outdoors? :dubious: ), do it in Wisconsin. Then when you go to the big house, you could meet QtM.

No chocolate? Put your self on your own List, FCM.

Good luck wiht the job, SCL!

363

Oh lord, Bob. Groan.
There was something work-related that QD wanted me to say here, but I forget. Work was dead boring. I’m glad to be at home. I’m working with Neurotic Co-Worker and Complaining Co-Worker tomorrow. I might run mad with a metal ruler.

364

I remembered! We have the new Tolkien in a box at work, with “Strict On-Sale Date- April 17th!” all over it. I’m going to leaf through it, and I’m sure all our hardcore Tolkienites are very excited.

365

Yay! rosie has been [del]bullied[/del] encouraged into hosting!

Glad you made it back OK, rosie. Sounds like the whole east coast is a mess. My brother arrived safely in Boston, but I guess it’s raining buckets there, too. He’s running in the marathon tomorrow (he’ll be the wet one in his late 40s :smiley: ); so think of him from about 10:00-1:00.

Sounds like work has gotten pretty rotten, doggio. Hope the time between now and July (that’s when you said you’d be looking, right?) goes by fast.

Bad joke, Bobbio. :smiley:

I’ll bet there are lots of envious Dopers out there, LiLi. I’m not a big Tolkien fan, so I’ll let others have my copy of the new book.

My taxes (federal, state AND local) are all filed, finally. And I’ve filed away all my copies so that I don’t get confused later. I actually got quite a bit done and cleaned up today - yay! But it was painful. And I didn’t get any work work done (really wanted to get a few hours in), so I’ll be heading in to work really early. Woo hoo.

So now it’s way past my bedtime and I’m not actually sleepy.

Can someone tell me a story, please?

GT

366

Hummmmmmm, let’s see…a story for gt…

Fairy tales start out “Once upon a time…”

Southern tales start out “Ya’ll ain’t agonna believe this shit…”

367

rosie, I’m looking forward to the MMP.

Bob and SCL, good ones! :smiley: