Parenting Snark: When is the right age for a kid to have their own computer?

So, it’s my son’s 7th birthday next week and I got him a computer on Black Friday. I posted about it - $188 cheap thing at Wal-Mart. It’s what I could afford. He is THRILLED. Originally he was going to have a Leapster for his birthday. Sounded good, right? Most kids have something like that, but a $200 laptop would do SO much more. He’s set for Hanukkah and his bday. Like I said, THRILLED. And that’s what we can afford.

His teachers assign reading and writing online and I often use my computer at home for work. Plus he likes to play on National Geographic and has a phonics game on it. He was coming home CRYING last year because he wasn’t reading yet. I am very proud of how hard he works. The kid is a real mensch and it’s nothing I’m doing. I’m lucky.

So he gets a laptop. He’s excited, right? He wants to write his best friend an email. I tell him that you have to ask politely for his mom’s email (i have it, but) so he’s not being rude by ‘spamming’. He said ok.

So what does his best friend’s parents do on Facebook? Well, they post about it! And then proceeds to say that first grade is just too young. I sent him a msg about it, because it hurt and it was aimed at me. Apparently his kid did the, “Jude got this and I want it, too” thing and he had the audacity to tell me that ‘that kind of spending is just not done in our house’ and I was giving my child a sense of entitlement that he can’t handle properly.

All right. Of course there was a lot of :mad::mad: over that but I’m wondering:

When is it OK for a kid to have his own computer? (Or kids to have a shared desktop?)

I think if they’re responsible enough and old enough to type, go for it. His reading and writing definitely improved when he started to use mine, and even though his ‘free time’ is timed, I say it builds tech and English skills…plus I want him to be able to edit photos and videos within a few years. I’d rather see him on the computer “doing” something than being on the couch doing nothing. So everything in our house is limited. I often joke, “Jude, that Wii is making you stupid. Go play with Legos.”

Still, the other person’s issue was that a laptop (even a very cheap one) was just NOT appropriate for a kid that age and that anything before 13 was too young. (Of course, his kid raked in over $4k for his bar mitzvah…)

I was pretty surprised at that one. Did I miss something? So, Dopers, most of whom are tech savvy/hands on parents/chickens in the back yard/Whole Foods lovin’/Apple family types:**

What age is appropriate for a kid to have his own computer? For me, the answer is: As soon as they can type!**

My kids have had access to a shared computer since birth. The youngest got his own (used) laptop when he was about 5 years old.

Mine had his own (one of my old ones) at 2. I wrote a program to teach him alphabet and then to teach him to read and he ran it on that machine. Then he graduated to starfall.com etc…

The grandboy is getting some sort of tablet (don’t remember what, but it’s not one of the kid ones) for Xmas.

He just turned two at the beginning of November.

He’s fortunate to have rich grandparents on the other side, who love the chance to buy him stuff.

His mom got a Kindle because she couldn’t ever use her phone, he’d taken it over. Of course, now she’s got her phone back - he’s got the Kindle.

I thought it was nuts until we saw the kid playing with stuff last night. He operates a smart-phone better than I do. :eek:

6 seems perfectly fine to me. My kids got their first shared computer when they were 4,6&8. It easier for it to turn into a time sink than other toys, but there’s nothing inherently wrong with having a computer at that age.

Posting about it on facebook? “sense of entitlement” ? WTF? Do they have no idea how inexpensive computers have gotten? You should put up your own post about how they’re intentionally crippling their child’s development by being so cheap (mostly kidding).

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. It’s outrageous for your son to have one of them. Only large educational research institutions, and maybe the government, should have the need to own a computer. Why, I’ll bet your son doesn’t even know how to program in machine language.

What do you care what other parents think of this? If you think it’s right for your child, then so be it.

Then again, it seems you’re concerned about how much money another kid “rakes in at his bar mitzvah” so maybe there’s just too much gossiping going on in your circle to begin with.

I got mine (Commodore64) in early elementary school. I did have to share the family PC during high school but got my own LCII in college. I think it was all a matter of cost. If you can find a cheap or hand me down computer I don’t see any reason not to get one for a responsible kid as soon as they are able to use it.

Certainly by the time they start annoying you because you never have access to your own computer, they should get their own.

My sons managed to get by using our family computer, until they went away to college when they got laptops. It was very helpful for me to be able to control their time. They were actually more concerned with getting the latest phones and consol gaming systems than their very own computer.

That was 4-5 years ago. With everyone on Earth spending 23.7 hours a day on Facebook, I can see the need for something that can do that. My kids do that on their fancy-schmacy telephones now.

Your kid should have access to a laptop whenever you think it’s appropriate for him to do so. And if it’s helping him become more confident in his literary skills, all the better.

The other kid’s parent needs to can it. There’s a word called “no” that most kids hear a lot. If he doesn’t want to buy his kid a laptop, he should use it.

And for what it’s worthy, $200 isn’t completely outrageous for a toy. A souped-up kitchen set for an 18-month old can cost $180 new, and lots of kids have those. Sure, you don’t want to spend like that regularly, but even if you did, that’s your responsibility.

Any age is appropriate. Letting the kid go on it 24/7 (which you’re not doing) is another matter - having the actual device is just having that device.

I’m not even sure when my daughter got her own computer - maybe 5 or so? Prior to that she used mine now and then. She had a special Winnie-the-Pooh mouse configured for baby hands from the age of six months, to let her play the occasional baby computer game.

And there is tons and tons of educational computer stuff (software and internet sites) for kids that age, really good fun stuff that they don’t even realise is educational.

I’d give a child a used laptop with the internet disabled at about that age. Sounds like another mommy’s feeling inadequate.

Internet communication(s) can perhaps be regulated until a bit later on, but my answer: as soon as possible.

Today’s job market requires solid computer skills. Having these ingrained at a young age (5, iirc) helped me exponentially throughout college and finding a job.

There is using a computer, and there is mastering a computer. The two are mutually exclusive.

Well, he was in the low end compared to what I’ve seen. But I was thinking that I don’t go all judgy about their 13 year old’s access to cash (he got a Macbook) and I think their kids are great. I sincerely love their kids - ages 6, 12, and 13.

But why are they talking about MINE? He said it came up ‘at the dinner table’ !

My kid has been borrowing my comp since preschool. I wanted to buy him his own last year and couldn’t. They are an “Apple” family and use Apple products - way more expensive than ours. But it’s THEIR cash. When his wife’s computer died, she went straight to the Apple store the next day and dropped $2k on a cheap one.

“We don’t spend that kind of money in our house.”

appptttht

It’s their money. And this is my money. The idea that I’m giving my kid a ‘sense of entitlement’ (his words) makes me angry.

We have a single computer that we all share. That goes for the kids aged 14, 12, 9 and 7. That way their time on it is limited, and they can only use it in the common areas of the house where anyone can see what they are doing.

I have to admit I can’t imagine why a 6 year old would need his own computer.

That. Is awesome.

Reply to him that computers are cheap, so obviously that’s not the real issue he’s concerned about. And if he has any problems with your parenting, to shove them firmly up his ass in the future.

So he can keep his paws off mine! :smiley:

There are a lot of things kids don’t “need” that they have. For his homework and phonics games and just because he’s interested, I think it’s reasonable. He doesn’t “need” a Wii or “need” a Toy Story lunch box, but he has those things.

shrug You can do what you like. Several people I know let their kids have an older laptop for playing on, so they don’t get in the way of the adult’s computer (or mess it up somehow!).

My husband bought himself an Atari 800 with his earned money when he was 10, and started programming on it. Guess what he does now?

OTOH we’ve limited our kids’ computer time pretty severely. I think it’s really one of those things that a family has to decide individually.

This is not a ‘kids with computers’ problem, it’s a ‘my facebook friend is a jerkass’ problem. Unfriend him and move on.

That said, as long as your kid gets a variety of activities, so he’s not staring at the screen up close all day, he should be fine. I wouldn’t let him out on the internet alone but there’s all sorts of age-appropriate and restricted sites you can find for him.