Pealing The Onion

This is kind of mundane and pointless, but I thought others might enjoy this article about my favorite newspaper, The Onion.

And I hope it stays that way for a long, long time.

I love their video news productions. They seem downright offensive sometimes and look just like a regular real morning news show. I sent one to my mother and she thought it was real.

I don’t think a parent corporation would allow them to give a tutorial on how to dress up your faggy young son for Halloween to cover up his effeminate traits even as a parody.

The videos are awesome.
Some of my favourites:
Ex-Pedophile Shares Tips On How To Make Your Kids Less Attractive
Boy Finds Own Real-Life E.T.
Crime Reporter Finds Way Of Linking Warehouse Fire To Depraved Sex Act
This one is hilariously disturbing
Little Boy Heroically Shoots, Mutilates Burglar

I’m impressed by how good the child actors are.

OK, I feel old now. I remember sitting in a UW-Madison classroom 21 years ago, having picked up a copy of something called “The Onion” along with the two campus newspapers, and boggling over this satirical paper. An especially memorable front page featured the claim that the main liberal arts building - one of those huge, oppressive concrete things - had been “tipped” in the middle of the night by drunken students. Like “cow tipping” but on a grand scale. Photographic “evidence” showing the building on its side is probably what led one freshman gal nearby to exclaim about it to her friend, reacting as if it had actually happened.

I first picked it up…my god…15 years ago. I saw it in April and immediately got that it was satire, but figured it was just an April Fools version of The Union, which I assumed to be the school newspaper. I always regret not taking the chance of joining the staff while they were still in Madison.

I doubt you’d be rich, but oh! the good times!

The one good thing about going to college in the city is the Onion newsstand right by the school.

I discovered the Onion around 10 years ago when my girlfriend at the time, after hearing me rave about my new discovery of the Straight Dope, showed me an issue with a SD column. (I assume the SD columns used to be a regular feature?). I don’t remember the column, but it was the issue with the Super Monkey Colliders article on the front page. It was one of the funniest things I’d ever read (especially since I didn’t expect it to be satire before reading it. I had no idea what it was going into it.)

One of my favorite vids is the one about the football team who forfeits a game after losing a coin toss and realizing that they have no control over anything in a world governed by random chance. Brilliant.