Why does the South Park episode Scott Tenorman Must Die keep coming to mind?
I feel the same way. I just remembered something that would be great for this. They sell these doorknob alarms that would be perfect. You normally hang them from the doorknob and then if anyone opens the door, it activates the alarm. But you don’t have to put it on a doorknob. It works by sensing when it’s moved. Put one of those in your lunchbag and you’d catch the crook for sure. I think stores like Walmart sell them.
Here’s one on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Personal-Door-Alarm-Austin-House/dp/B0009XTTVY/ref=pd_sim_e_3_img
Congrats! While the curious and evil side of me would’ve liked to see you catch the person, preferably halfway through your cat food sandwich, at least your lunch was unmolested today. Here’s hoping he or she took the hint and it stays that way from now on.
Sometimes, you get the wrong guy. I didn’t want to hijack, but the story seems to be dying down.
BTW, I did not do the following, I witnessed it.
When I was first transferred to DC, (ARMY) I spent a couple of weeks in the transient barracks while finding a house off post.
My first day a bunch of guys were in the kitchen glueing the bottom of a beer can. They were out to catch a beer theif and had rigged the can with urine.
Later that night another new guy came in. Being late he had taken the only beer in the fridge and left a nice note and a dollar to pay for the beer and a promise to replace it tomorrow.
Needless to say the nice guy said the beer tasted like piss. He took his dollar and note back.
This is what I would do too. They make personal alarms that you can hang on a door knob and any movement from the door that disturbs the device sets off the alarm. (I’ve used this to keep the cat off the table too.) You can also activate the alarm by yanking the wrist-loop out of the device, which is attached to a resetable pin. My thought was to put a small hole in the bag and string the loop through and attach it to the rack in the fridge. Perp pulls out bag, pin is pulled, MOUSETRAP!
Fun as all the booby-trap ideas are, I think what I would actually do is watch the refrigerator like a hawk. The curiosity to know who was doing this would kill me otherwise.
Yeah, pretty much. Cat food smells so awful, almost nobody is going to just take a bite of a cat food sandwich without noticing the smell first. Even then, while gross, it’s still just cat food, so I’m not sure this revenge is all that vengeful. The theif is probably just annoyed now, and is either going to tamper with your lunch, or just start taking someone else’s.
Actually catching the theif would be better. Most* of the stories I read about the food theives actually being caught, it’s not someone who actually needs the food, but either a peer of the victim, or someone higher-up. Just someone who felt entitled to the food.
*Actually, ALL, except for the one in this thread.
But the food stealer only wins if he gets something (good) to eat, right? Keeping your lunch with you prevents that. I really doubt this person is engaged in a battle with you over your right to not have food stolen from the fridge. He’s just hungry and feels entitled.
(Or she, of course.)
If this were a novel, someone at the office would die. It turns out that person was a 'Doper. But the lunch thefts continue…
I don’t think it’s the same as DigitalC’s situation. I can’t imagine a new person walking into the office, taking his lunch, and leaving money and a nice note in return. Still doesn’t transition over to his situation, the person is still doing the equivalent of stealing imo.
The habeneros would work, but if you just want to see who starts piling food out of their mouth, mix it with 10x the salt you would actually want. We discovered at the pizza restaurant I worked at that the best joke soda-spike was not jalapenos, but salt. People just marched over to the sink and spat.
It’s a start, maybe. I think you need something more sophisticated. A staple remover, re-stapling carefully—it could still be tampered with and you wouldn’t know.
He/She has you stapling your lunch shut now. I don’t know if he/she has won but you’ve lost something.
If you had some simple data, you might be able to deduce it, or at least narrow it down, like a game of Clue. E.g.
Day 1:
8:00 AM, you put lunch in fridge.
Alice, Bob, Carol, Dan, and Ed were the only ones in the breakroom up until the time your lunch went missing.
Day 2:
8:00 AM, you put lunch in fridge.
Alice, Bob, Carol were the only ones in the breakroom up until the time your lunch went missing.
Day 3:
8:00 AM, you put lunch in fridge.
Carol, Dan, and Ed were the only ones in the breakroom up until the time your lunch went missing.
Assuming a lone thief, it’s Carol. She was the only one who was there all three times.
I don’t know how busy your break room is, whether you could monitor it closely enough to know, etc. I’d watch for someone who goes in alone…I think most wouldn’t steal in front of someone else.
If you want authenticity don’t forget to mash some corn into it. Label the baggie with a lab address and triple bag it for effect.
If you want to find the thief then hide a key finder inside the fake turd. Wait for turd-lunch to disappear and then locate the thief. Upon locating your turd, take a bite out of it in front of the thief with a “children of the corn” blank stare.
I just spat catfood all over my screen. 
So Digi - did anyone call in sick today?
I once buttered a yellow kitchen sponge that looked similar to a piece of toast - my mates dad took a huge horse-toothed bite out of it.
You can’t just stand around there watching because the thief isn’t going to steal the lunch if he knows you’re there.
Argent Towers suggested what I had been planning to post. Get one of these and rig it with a hair trigger. Tape it to the bottom of the sack and the lanyard to the sandwich bag.
Someone innocently moves bag, no problem.
Thief takes sandwich out of the bag and everyone in the area knows something is up. I’d also have modified it so that it can’t be easily shut off.
(Former lunch-stealer here) This would have frightened me badly. Good idea.
Um, what is the OP supposed to do, spend the entire day in the breakroom? :rolleyes: