Pets

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

This might sound ridiculous–but I think there are a lot of animal-lovers here, so I would really like some input. My question is: how do you deal with a pet’s death? Or your limited ability to care for your pets?

I had two guinea pigs and one died about a year and a half ago and I’m still so sad about it. The other is still alive, and I’m always worried for when he dies. (Plus I feel guilty that he’s lonely, but I can’t get him a mate because it would have to be a spayed female or they might not get along, and that’s not easy to find and I don’t have the funds to make it happen–plus if I keep getting another one each time one dies, this cycle will never end, and I don’t think I can handle it).

I feel like there’s no way to feel any better about this, but there must be, I guess? I know other people have pets and love them and still manage to move on with their lives when their pets die. I take the best care I can of my pets. I give them the premium food and bought the biggest cage commercially available and all (but then I just feel bad that I didn’t make my own bigger cage, like the websites say to, but I don’t have room). But I can’t give them as much attention or cage space as I feel I should (that’s why I got the second one–to keep the first one company, but now I only have the second one left, so what do I do?)>

When my guinea pig died I even posted on some pet loss boards, but those people had ideas about “the rainbow bridge” or something, where pets wait for their owners. Well, I wished I believed in something like that, but I don’t. If you don’t believe in that kind of thing, but still have pets that you love, how do you deal with their limited lifespan?

2
  1. You do the best you can with what you’ve got.
  2. You obviously care, really care, about him, so in that regard you are miles ahead of many pet owners.

You keep your little guy well fed, warm, and clean. You have the basics well covered. I don’t know a whole lot about GPs but I have friends who have them. One of the few things I’ve picked up is that you can make their environment more interesting by changing out the “furniture” in it. Different Pigloos, or towels they can burrow into. Tuck yummy nibbles into things, give a variety of foods, and if he likes to be handled or go exploring you can make a playpen for him for a change of scene when you are home. One friend lets her piggie scoot around the bathroom in the mornings while she showers and gets ready for work.

You may be doing all of this already, and if so he sounds like a lucky little pig!

As to the loss, it’s never easy. The only thing that soothes me at all is knowing that I did the best I could for my critters, that they knew they were loved (and I think they do, mostly) and that their pain and fear at the end of their lives was as minimal as humanely possible. I will do and spend just about anything to keep my guys (cats, dogs, horses) from being in pain, and to keep them from being frightened - which I think is actually harder on animals than feeling sick.

The thing about animals is that they don’t sit there fuming that their person is or isn’t doing something, and rehashing all the things that went wrong over the years. They pretty much live in the moment, so if their surroundings are comfortable and interesting, and they have food, water and shelter then they are pretty happy.

I hear ya on the Rainbow Bridge glurge. I like to think that perhaps I will somehow reconnect with some of the special beings in my life (human and animal) in the great beyond, but I have no illusions of skipping off into a rosy glow with my faithful friends gamboling around me.

It tears me up every time I lose an animal friend, but the joy they give me during their lives far, far, FAR outweighs the sadness of their loss. My life would feel empty without them, but I know that’s not the same for everyone. I do sort of plan for the loss of an animal. For example, I have 2 dogs, one is 12 and one is about 9. I know their days are slowly winding down. In the back of my mind, I’m contemplating getting a puppy. Probably not this year, maybe not even next year, but I’m thinking about it because I know I will be devastated when these guys go, but I also know that I need at least one dog in my life.

It is a sad cycle, if you look at in terms of loss. I prefer to look at it in terms of new friends in my life, and being able to get to know each unique individual. Only yo know if you can handle it, but I think getting another pet or two now is not a bad idea. Do you have the funds/room to get two baby pigs and put them in a separate area near to your 1st guy? They can slowly get acquainted, then maybe be combined. Or maybe go for a smaller critter like a rat, which make fantastic pets.

Anyway, sorry for the long winded post, but I do feel for you. Don’t feel guilty, you ARE doing right by your little guy.

3

You recognize that they are animals with a much more limited lifespan than humans…and move on.

4

You just have to deal with it the best way you can, however that is. The most important thing is to keep your pets happy and healthy, with lots of attention and love.
They’re only with us for such a short amount of time, considering the grand scheme of things. Just keep them happy, is all.

When the end comes, you will know that you did the best you could for them, and you’ll have no regrets. You will have a heavy heart, though. But, each day makes their loss a little easier to bear. That’s how it works.

Just yesterday, I took one of my rats to the vet to be put down, because she had a tumor, and was too old for the surgery to remove it. So, this was best for her, because I didn’t want her to suffer. It was heartbreaking, but it had to be done.

5

You obviously care about your animals, but you have to realize they are animals. People have a tendency to engage in Anthropomorphism with animals. Projecting human feelings on pets, is fun but it’s not terribly realistic.

The cold hard fact is everything dies. Pets, people and even bacteria eventually go that route. As Saje says you should celebrate their life while you got them.

Pets are happy with food, some attention and a clean place to sleep. They don’t care about TV shows, or getting to work, or other such human worries.

Learn to enjoy what you have, whether it’s a pet, a computer or even a lousy job. I’ve been working temp jobs for three years. I’d KILL for one of my lousy jobs in the past, that at least was permanent. You don’t realize what you have till it’s gone.

There’s a great old book by Dale Carnegie called How To Stop Worrying and Start Living, it’s a great read and should be available at most libraries.

6

Pet loss isn’t easy, but if they die of natural causes, it’s somewhat easier to bear. I tell myself that although my pets will predecease me, and I will miss them, they will have good lives while they are here. And then I try to make sure they do have good lives – I’ve been mindful to spend quality time with the dogs, not just let them hang around the house.

One thing that can help is to learn as much as you can about the pet(s) – I’ve found in every case that the more I put into learning about and observing an animal, the more I get out of the relationship. Look for guinea pig resources online; maybe you can give your piggie “food puzzles” to entertain and challenge (I don’t know if they have such things for cavies, but they sure do for dogs and parrots!). Make life good, and death will bring fewer regrets.

7

Another thing that helps us is to rescue pets that desperately need homes, and to remember what each one has brought into our loves. Our little Cheerio is gone, but because of him, we knew about birds and have taken a half-dozen more in, giving them relatively good lives instead of a tiny cage in a corner. Because of him, people thought of us as “bird people,” and the neighbor brought us a lost homing pigeon whom we re-united with his flock; another lady gave us captive starlings whom we delivered to a wildlife rehabilitator who eventually released them into the wild successfully, and so on. All these lives were made better because Cheerio’s personality and efforts to reach out to us got us more interested in learning about and understanding birds.

I’ve learned even more from the dogs we took in. If a pet spurs you to learn and grow, that pet really will be a part of you in a sense after he or she passes on. If you become an adopter, a foster, a rescuer, an advocate, a teacher of others, that pet will live on in a way, doing good on down the years for others.

8

Just a thought, sort of unrelated to the other replies: You could try looking at online forums for guinea pig owners and see if you can find another elderly pig to live with the one you have now. It may not work, and you may not even want to, but it could improve the quality of life, and wouldn’t get you into the cycle of always having to get another because you have one left. I dunno. I just know I’ve seen people in similar situations do that.

9

good on you, sailboat. i’ve had dogs and cats all my life and couldn’t fathom a life without them. most of them have been strays - the two cats i have now literally came to me in the street - altho obtaining miss magnolia (formerly known as speck) was a little over the top. she was actually a road trip to chattanooga.

oh, screw that stupid url code crap! never have been able to do them right. :smack: here’s the original thread link:

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=423481&highlight=Speck
yep, they’re gonna die. that’s just the way it is. i miss my big guy murphy to this day , but i have maggie (magnolia) and turk, and when they’re gone, there will always be another one right around the corner needing love and a good home.

we get more from our pets than they ever get from us. i’ve always felt that animals make us better than we would be otherwise.

10

It isn’t a tragedy when people or pets die of old age. It’s something everybody should be prepared for. And for pets, you just need a new pet. Finding a new human is a little tougher though.

11

I still occasionally cry when I think of our dog, Sichote, who we had to put down last spring (for instance, right now, as I type this). I don’t know how long it’ll take to not cry, and to be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever get to that point. And I’m fine with that. I loved her a lot, and I miss her a lot. It’s ok to always miss a pet, I think, and get a little sad when you think of them.

I feel bad for our other dog because now he’s alone, but he’s adjusted as well (and we’ve changed habits so he gets to play with his buddies more often). I agree with the ideas to give you GP puzzles to do and adding / changing interesting items in her/his cage. I’ve found that since we’ve lost Sichote (the first time I’ve lost a pet in my adult life), I treasure moments with my other dog a little bit more. I pay attention to what he’s doing and maybe let him get away with a bit more once in a while.

12

Thanks, I will try that. I would be happy to find another guinea pig if I think it could live with mine.

Yes, if only everyone could reason their way out of emotions, what a wonderful, emotionless, world it would be.

Thank you, I do tend to worry about like everything, so I will try reading that book. Thank you to everyone who gave me advice, it really did help :slight_smile: Really, everyone :slight_smile:

13

I went to a funeral a couple of years ago, and was talking to the funeral director, who is an acquaintance of mine. It will seem funny, but he was in deep mourning because his dog had just died. I sympathized with him and asked him if he planned to get another dog. He said he didn’t feel that he could, because he had loved this dog so much and it broke his heart to lose it, and no other dog could replace it.

I told him that I understood, and if he didn’t feel that it was the time to have another dog, then he shouldn’t do it. But I also told him about a few years before when my dog had died and I knew that I had wanted another dog right away. In my eyes, it was not only that I always want the companionship of a dog, but it was a tribute to the wonderful qualities of the first dog that would make me want another.

I mean, if you had a terrible dog that brought you nothing but aggravation, you wouldn’t want to get another dog, would you? But if you can accept that each dog is different, your whole life can be filled with friendship and love.

14

I’m religious and believe in an afterlife, but I don’t like the glurgy rainbow bridge.

My philosophy is to always do your best for them, knowing your best isn’t the same as someone else’s best - but if it’s the best you can do, than youface the end without the awful “what if” questions. What if I’d paid $4000 for the surgery witha 20% chance of success? What if I’d cooked their food every day instead of bought kibble? YOU DID THE BEST YOU COULD. Let it go.

And if you think your piggie is grieving, consider getting another. I’ve said since I lost my first dog, that I’d never have one dog again. It hurts too much to come home to an empty house. Besides, I don’t think animals are meant to be alone.

My condolences for the lost of your pet.

StG

15

My dog died in October and I am surprised how well I have dealt with his death. I loved him so much–sooo much. But he had cancer and it was progressing and he was bleeding from the mouth (oral cancer) and having trouble breathing. He had a very, very good long life–he was almost 12, which is almost an average lifespan for a Westie–so that comforts me. The night before he died he would fall asleep and then wake up snuffling and coughing and bright red blood was coming from his mouth. Before that night, the blood was much more watery, and he could sleep more soundly. He was on a lot of expensive drugs at the end so I don’t think he was in too much pain, but that night I knew it was time. I called the vet in the morning and told them I was bringing him in and on the way we stopped in a nearby field where we’d gone regularly for years, and I talked to him and told him I loved him. The actual death was quick and peaceful but as much as I tried to be “there,” I was in more of a dream state than anything. (Um, tears now.)

I was able to handle the loss because he didn’t die suddenly and I knew it was coming. In the months between his cancer diagnosis and his death, I prepared myself, and I gave him even more love and fun than he’d had before. But there was nothing I could do about the cancer. Nothing.

What helped was the compassion of my friends and the people at the vet clinic. Everyone was so kind and understanding. My boss let me take off work, my friends called and texted.

And, as St. Germain said, I did the best I could, but I couldn’t fight nature. It’s cliche, but death is part of life. I had my little guy for a long time and we loved each other, but that’s over. Nothing is permanent. When you have something you love, love it the best you can.

16

I always make sure I have another younger dog when I know the end is near for my oldest one.

Going out and getting a replacement dog for one that has already passed wouldn’t work for me. The younger dog has to be already part of the family.

My family and I (and the younger dog) can rejoice about that great time we had with the dog and the having the younger dog around just seems to make the grieving process easier.