Well, there’s the ** Baader Meinhof Comedy Hour** and Mr. Crowley’s Neighborhood , but right now I’m in the mood for some desert isle hijinks.
Prospero’s Island: The Minnow lands on the island featured in The Tempest and Miranda falls for Gilligan (Caliban can chase after Ginger.)
Stairway to Gilligan’s Island: Led Zeppelin’s tour jet experiences engine trouble so they make an emergency landing on Gilligan’s Island. The professor fixes the plane and as a thank you Led Zeppelin plays a concert complete with a rousing rendition of Rock and Roll , then takes off with the women.
But for must see TV I recommend The Further Adventures of Piers Plowman. Plot synopsis: It was all a dream!
Will It Float? In Rehearsal The dramatic tensions and backstage romances of the Late Show Will It Float? girls. Guest appearances by the band members, Biff Henderson, Alan Kalter, Rupert Jee and passers-by in front of the Ed Sullivan Theater, and assorted bit players from Broadway shows.
This show borrows liberally from Fame, Sex and the City and The Honeymooners for retreads of old plots, with the Grinder Girl, the Hula Hoop Girl, and the two Dropper Girls engaged in backstage activities. Filmed in real time a la 24 as they prepare for dropping this week’s mystery object into the tank.
To be run opposite every episode of American Idol.
There was a one-shot animated special called Carlton, Your Doorman based on the Rhoda character. However, Carlton was depicted, since it probably would have been difficult had he not been. (There, as in Rhoda, he was voiced by Lorenzo “Garfield” Music.")
Blasphemy! Naked chocolate Jesuses? Elephant-dung Virgin Maries? Drawings of Muhammed? Those are just for starters. Each week, our contestants will make unusual art pieces featuring various religious deities. The goal? To not offend our panel of judges! However, with outspoken, easily offended judges like Catholic League president William Donohue and his buddy ultra-conservative Parents Television Council president L. Brent Bozell III, it’s going to be harder than it looks! Pray for mercy!
The Klingon Rerun Show: A number of years ago, NBC had a television show called The Rerun Show, which featured tongue-in-cheek sketches based on scripts from old Columbia/Sony sitcoms. Now, here’s a new program featuring classic Paramount shows performed entirely in Klingon! You’ll laugh at the skewering of the infamous episode of Jaj Quch where Fonzie sups the norgh! And who can forget the “Nuq hech suD wovmoHul’?” scene from Taxi?
Elementary School Play of the Week: Mom and Dad, this is Jimmy and Jenny’s turn to shine for 50 million viewers. Each week, another elementary school play is taped and presented to the viewing public. Watch for such exciting and timely presentations as “The Four Food Groups,” and “Our Fifty States.” Hosted by Frankie Muniz.
Guantana-Mo! Sitcom starring Mohammed “Mo” Said, who had no interest in Taliban politics but ran a take-out restaurant in Kabul and just happened to be in the neighbourhood delivering coffee when rounded up with everyone else. Episodes will feature Mo being interrogated mercilessly and denied basic legal rights until he denounces Islam and agrees that America is the world’s shining beacon of liberty, freedom, and justice. Wackiness ensues when he doesn’t, and begs to be allowed to just go home. A George W. Bush - Dick Cheney Production.
BLT and Mayo: Meet Brandon Lewis Taylor (David Spade) and Mae “Mayo” Cooper (Victoria Jackson). He’s a short-order cook. She’s a sassy waitress. Together–they’re detectives! Well, they are when they’re not running their 24-hour truck-stop cafe. Which, as you might be able to guess, is most of the time. Probably just as well.
Fred Blandings, CPA: Cops, detectives, doctors, and lawyers all have been done before–it’s time for another profession to take the spotlight. Each week, Fred will work diligently for a client, balancing accounts and producing various financial statements. Thrill to Fred’s quickness with his calculator, and watch in awe as he reaches the bottom line. Will the client show a profit this year? Tune in Thursdays at nine to find out!
Build It and Squint: Peer at the 4x4" square in the center of your screen to travel back in time to 1931 and see experiments in low-definition mechanically scanned TV as amateur radio enthusiasts might have brought in, jittering unsteadily over the shortwave bands (that’s the pictures I’m talking about). Thrill to 15-minute static headshots of amateur singers, poorly conceived puppet shows, unrecognizable charcoal sketches, and undecipherable station identification cards. Presented in shimmering 60-line resolution in flickering neon-tube red and black.
That inspires another: The Dipsomaniac Gourmet! Some famous alcoholic, maybe Mel Gibson or John LaRoquette, barhops around the world trying out cocktails, wines and beers! Also getting into pointless fights and picking up barfly sluts.
Why not have two of them co-host? ‘Cauzh after all…thish is the man…ri’ here hic my buddy the man hic yeahhh. Didja call a cab? hic Izzat cab here yet? Oh, you got your car, Mel…?
24: Jack Bauer’s Day Off - Jack sleeps in until ten, loafs around the house reading the paper and eating some leftovers, goes out grocery shopping (they’ll show these episodes during sweeps month), does a load of laundry, watchs some TV, and goes back to bed.
Touch The Croc: Twenty contestants are flown to the banks of the River Nile, where a massive, hungry crocodile is waiting. All they have to do is to keep one hand on the animal for as long as they can. The last one to let go wins a year’s supply of shoes and handbags for their next-of-kin.
Place Invaders: A small team of fashion experts and celebrities are tasked with the invasion of Norway, with only their wits and talent to help them. This week’s, they have to mount an amphibious assault on Bergen and overthrow the local government to impose a stable fascist theocracy - using only the same materials, tools and technology as known to the remote and peaceful stone-age Pikulan tribe of Chile. Warning: contains nudity and strong language.
Slough Of Despond: On the site of a proposed retail park in Slough, Berkshire sits a factory that has remained untouched since February. This building, erected in 1968 for the printing of business cards and restaurant menus, is scheduled for demolition, and the team have only three days before the bulldozers move in. Will they have time to solve the age-old and compelling mystery: why was there always a damp patch on the south-facing wall, even in summer? With Tony Robinson.
Trailer Park, 90210 - A mobile home is placed on a vacant lot surrounded by million dollar mansions and a family of is plucked from the Glenaire Mobile Home Park in Fresno and moved into the mobile home. Unlike the Beverly Hillbillies, these people will still have to survive on Mom’s unemployment check, Billy’s job at In and Out, and Missy’s part time job at the nail salon. Name That Smell - Contestants sniff items brought in from all over the world and try to name the items by smell alone.
