Pitting the Pit

I think the OPs problem is that he or she needs to recognize that the Pit is all style over substance. No one really cares that you have a cubicle-mate who playes Georgian chanting music all day, showers once a week and calls all the women in the office “baby”. Nor do we realy care about the latest outrage over the father who raped a two-year old (OK, we care but that isn’t really why we post it here). We don’t really care about the horrible experince you had Best Buy or Blockbuster or Burger King or Sears or Wal-Mart or Paypal or eBay or the airport or the mall or the theater or the DMV or the post office. But we do like a good story, a good outrage, so it is all in the telling, not in the subject. The opposite of the Pit, of course, General Questions where you could post, “Why sky blue?” and get answers, usually dry and to the point.

So read the Pit not as a source of news or to delve deeply into the personal lives of your fellow dopers. Read the Pit for enterteinment and don’t concern yourself with what he post is about.

[QUOTE=SmartAleq]
Well, it’s all about being stuck up cunts, isn’t it?

Aw, snappity!
[/QUOTE]

Ooh, nice double entendre. Very well done.

The only place I’ve ever heard “Oh, SNAP!” was on “My Name is Earl.” Joy says it.

Equipoise, it’s so funny that you think there will even BE future generations. That’s some pie-eyed optimism there.

[QUOTE=Equipoise]
The major liberals on this board, people like luci and Diogenes and Cervaise, are more informed than any right-winger here could ever dream of being. Right-wingers seem to me to be afraid of information and would rather whine about threads that give information and opinions about what’s going on.
[/quote]

So true! Information is so frightening, the way it sits there malevolently informing. Everywhere you turn, it’s information! You can’t swing a dead cat without someone trying to inform you of something. (Like, “You know that cat’s dead, right?”) Personally, I plan to spend the weekend in my house with the blinds down, wallowing in sweet ignorance. You might be able to lure me forth by a good tractor pull, but first you’d have to inform me that there’s a tractor pull going on and I am NOT LISTENING.

[QUOTE=miss elizabeth]
I pit you, you thread pissing bitch. Why the fuck do you even come here? There is no more worthless poster than you. I’ve never seen a post by you that wasn’t your way of flashing your shriveled up cunt at the board and urinating all over any and everything you can hit. You hate it here, and you think everyone on here is an idiot; Good for you! Go to Free Conservatives and yuk it up with the other assholes. You won’t be missed, trust me.
[/QUOTE]

Sing it. She’s never made a post here that was more than a sentence long bitching about something or someone.

[QUOTE=Carnick]
First off, I pit the fuckwits who enjoy being angry. These miserable sacks wake up every morning and scour the internet for a twisted, fucked up news story that they can then share with us. Raped babies, burnt puppies, burnt babies, raped puppies, the sicker the better. They post this crap on the Pit every day so that likeminded miserable sacks who are “normally against the death penalty” can file in and describe in great detail creative methods for physically punishing criminals. These self-proclaimed atheists will then follow it up with a frowney face and ask God why bad things are allowed to happen. Take your miserable shit and your miserable self and go be miserable alone.
[/QUOTE]
I literally couldn’t agree more. That’s how much I agree with this. 100% agreement.

It’s bad enough that the media focuses on every shitty, twisted thing someone somewhere has done and shoves it in our faces until we’re jumping at shadows. Do we really need to wallow in that sweet, sweet outrage here?

[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]
You forgot ‘fah’, which is annoyed dismissal. :smiley:
[/QUOTE]

But then we’d have to get into ‘gah’ and ‘pah’, which are simply unacceptable.

[QUOTE=Equipoise]
I’m a woman,
[/QUOTE]

Well excuuuuuuuuuuse me, princess.

When someone says “newspaper” I automatically bundle the paper version with its online counterpart. You specifically implied that you get most of your news from third hand reports on a message board.

That might be true, but what the fuck does that have to do with anything? You’re ignorant, but the right-wingers are more ignorant, so you’re excused? How do you even know they’re ignorant if you don’t go outside a message board that agrees with you for information now and again?

Nice rant, but again, what the fuck does that have to do with anything?

[QUOTE=SmartAleq]
Well, it’s all about being stuck up cunts, isn’t it?

Aw, snappity!
[/QUOTE]

:eek: You can’t say cunt, that’s hate speech that is.

[QUOTE=Jodi]
So true! Information is so frightening, the way it sits there malevolently informing. Everywhere you turn, it’s information! You can’t swing a dead cat without someone trying to inform you of something. (Like, “You know that cat’s dead, right?”) Personally, I plan to spend the weekend in my house with the blinds down, wallowing in sweet ignorance. You might be able to lure me forth by a good tractor pull, but first you’d have to inform me that there’s a tractor pull going on and I am NOT LISTENING.
[/QUOTE]
Are you a right-winger? No? Then what I said doesn’t apply to you. No need to be sarcastic at me. If you’re a right-winger and I haven’t noticed it before now (my memory banks tell me that you’re an intelligent Christian who’s willing to listen to what’s being said and would more likely respectfully agree to disagree than to imply someone is an unpatriotic heathen), then your sarcastic quote is just about how I picture right-winger’s minds (house closed up with the blinds drawn), so, good one.

[QUOTE=featherlou]
Equipoise, it’s so funny that you think there will even BE future generations. That’s some pie-eyed optimism there.
[/QUOTE]
I know. I’m a optimistic pessimist. I hope there will be future generations and an enlightened future (complete with appalled historians) but I don’t see how it’s possible.

[QUOTE=Carnick]
Well excuuuuuuuuuuse me, princess
[/QUOTE]
Asshole. Why does my stating my gender deserve a comeback like that? It’s a mistake others have made and I just correct it. I didn’t say “I’m a woman, dickhead” as if you should have known.

[QUOTE=Carnick]
When someone says “newspaper” I automatically bundle the paper version with its online counterpart. You specifically implied that you get most of your news from third hand reports on a message board.
[/QUOTE]
I did no such thing. My exact quote was…

[QUOTE=Equipoise]
I don’t watch TV or read newspapers, so often, I learn about what asswipe is up to by reading the Pit to see what dickheaded thing the fucktard did today.
[/QUOTE]
I don’t know if English is your second language, but “often” does not mean “most.” Often the way I meant it meant a few times a week. I should have clarified that when I said newspapers I was specifically talking about the paper variety. My mistake. Still, I read online newspapers far less often than other news sites. I use them mainly when I want a local point-of-view for whatever story I’m following.

[QUOTE=Carnick]
You’re ignorant, but the right-wingers are more ignorant, so you’re excused?
[/QUOTE]
Everybody’s ignorant of something, but right-wingers are woefully ignorant, it seems to me. If something smacks of liberalism, OFF goes the Paying Attention switch, and IN it gets tossed into the Left Wing/Liberal Media rubbish bin. I’m a die-hard liberal, but I’ll listen to conservative viewpoints and believe it or not sometimes agree with intelligent, well-thought out, logical points of view, but I rarely see the opposite. It’s become hard-wired to dismiss anything a liberal has to say. And no, I’m not talking about anything I say. I’m nowhere near articulate enough, and I’m an admitted hothead. I’m talking about the smart and articulate liberals on this board, of which there are many, but I’m not one of them. I’m just an average person (Republican-raised, incidentally) who can see both points of view and has come to believe that the liberal view is more often than not the better way, smarter, more logical, and more compassionate, less hateful and nasty.

[QUOTE=Carnick]
Nice rant, but again, what the fuck does that have to do with anything?
[/QUOTE]
Nothing. Just a hijack of the “ignorance is bliss” OP.

[QUOTE=miss elizabeth]
I pit you, you thread pissing bitch. Why the fuck do you even come here? There is no more worthless poster than you. I’ve never seen a post by you that wasn’t your way of flashing your shriveled up cunt at the board and urinating all over any and everything you can hit. You hate it here, and you think everyone on here is an idiot; Good for you! Go to Free Conservatives and yuk it up with the other assholes. You won’t be missed, trust me.
[/QUOTE]

Now THAT is a scorch! Damn, that’s such a thing of beauty, I do believe I’m tempted to ask miss elizabeth if I can copy and save it somewhere for future use. Sadly though, I’m way too much of a pussy to ever actually trot it out.
But I do stand in fucking awe.

[QUOTE=Equipoise]
Asshole. Why does my stating my gender deserve a comeback like that? It’s a mistake others have made and I just correct it. I didn’t say “I’m a woman, dickhead” as if you should have known.
[/quote]

It’s a quote from the old Zelda cartoon. I thought you were cultured!

Well at least you admit it was a nothing hijack. If this board were full of right-wingers posting daily rants about Hillary Clinton I’d say the same thing. The party is irrelevant, and if you read my OP you’d understand that, but you’re too busy ranting, spitting, and hissing like an overgrown toddler whenever you see the word “Bush.” I get it, you hate him. So do I. I don’t care. Take your hijacks and go away. There are plenty of other OPs here to post your monotonous drivel in. Try this one.

[QUOTE=Equipoise]
Are you a right-winger? No? Then what I said doesn’t apply to you. No need to be sarcastic at me.
[/quote]

Well, am I or aren’t I? Since all right-wingers are afraid of information and whine all the time, and you do me the courtesy of not including me in this group, either (a) I’m not a right-winger or (b) your defintion was stupid and inaccurate. Guess which one is correct.

Super. So if I’m NOT a right winger, I’m “an intelligent Christian who’s willing to listen to what’s being said and would more likely respectfully agree to disagree than to imply someone is an unpatriotic heathen,” but if I’m AM a right-wiinger then – ta da! – magically I become close-minded. I don’t care what side of the political aisle you’re on, that sort of snap judgment, made on such a flimsy basis, is indefensible and, yes, stupid.

If you put that great big broad brush for a minute, maybe you’d be able to conceive that it’s possible that I might be both a conservative and a decent person. Unless you’d like to throw common sense to the wind and line up with the other idiots who unfortunately can’t entertain that any person could possibly be both, in which case that’s something I’d probably like to keep in mind when reading your posts from now on.

[QUOTE=Jodi]

If you put that great big broad brush for a minute, maybe you’d be able to conceive that it’s possible that I might be both a conservative and a decent person. Unless you’d like to throw common sense to the wind and line up with the other idiots who unfortunately can’t entertain that any person could possibly be both, in which case that’s something I’d probably like to keep in mind when reading your posts from now on.
[/QUOTE]

Ok, this paragraph just earned you a spot on my “buy them a beverage if I ever meet them” list. Well said.

“Aw snap,” or “oh snap” as I recall it, has been around since I was in high school, ~20 years ago. According to Urban Dictionary, the rapper Biz Markie said it first in the 1980’s as a clean version of “oh shit,” meant in the sense of “oh no you didn’t!” I personally like it because it was a catchphrase of my youth that I didn’t hear for the entire 1990’s, then suddenly started hearing again when I began teaching middle school a couple of years ago.

Don’t like it? Meh. Too bad.

What about “word”? Is that still hep?

[QUOTE=El Cid Viscoso]
What about “word”? Is that still hep?
[/QUOTE]

Fo’ shizzle.

[QUOTE=Carnick]

Thanks for listening. I love you all.
[/QUOTE]

Love? LOVE? Love has no place here!

mm

[QUOTE=El Cid Viscoso]
What about “word”? Is that still hep?
[/QUOTE]

Believe it or not, it is! I had a kid say it to me today. As in I say, “Your test is postponed until after break.” Student: “Oh, word?” I love it. I haven’t heard “word to your mother” lately, though, so the outlook isn’t totally bleak for hepness.

[QUOTE=featherlou]

The only place I’ve ever heard “Oh, SNAP!” was on “My Name is Earl.” Joy says it.

[/QUOTE]

I’d heard it other places and not minded it but now Kirstie Alley is using it in one of her ads. I dislike her mightily, she misuses the word, and now I can’t hear it w/o thinking of her, which is very off-putting. So ‘SNAP’ is ruined for me.

[QUOTE=El Cid Viscoso]
I believe it was our dear departed Excalibre who came up with the apt moniker “recreational outrage.”

I can’t see through my tears to type about the rest of the hackneyed bunch. :weeps:
[/QUOTE]

Say, you’re right, Excalibre hasn’t posted since October.

Anyone know why?

-FrL-