I do believe that’s something you’re meant to gloss over, accept as read simply to make the story work, because it can’t take the weight of inquiry. Pushing on it brings the whole edifice down. It’s like Santa Claus, or the idea that the Republican Party is the party of sober, rational adults who keep the over-emotional idealists in check. Questioning it is in bad taste, you see. It’s a sign of poor breeding, and probably a defective stock, to put a point on it.
West Virginia’s dumbest lawyer is presenting his closing argument.
Why would it implant an indelible memory? Because you said so. This is crazy. You don’t get to decide how other people should remember stuff.
This is bizarre. Like seriously it seems out of place to him that someone didn’t take their shoes off before being assaulted. I don’t even know where to start.
This part kind of gets to the root of his malfunction. He seems almost entirely incapable of putting himself in someone’s shoes if it involves something outside his experience. Using the bathroom on the second floor of a house is completely unremarkable. Especially at a party with drinking.
There was a bathroom there. He can’t imagine what someone might be in an area of the house where there is a bathroom. He is weirdly hung up on the idea that the second floor of a house is somehow off limits at a teen drinking party.
She didn’t equivocate on any of those things. The weird idea that sprang up among Kavanaugh defenders in the last couple of days that fear of flying means incapable of flying is nuts. Pretty much every commercial flight with more than a dozen passengers on it includes at least one with a fear of flying.
A fire escape from a ground floor bedroom? What the fuck?
Finally, sometimes people have more than one reason for doing things. This is bonkers.
Maybe he thinks assaults only happen in mosques. Or maybe Japan. One of them foreign places.
I have no intention of defending UltraVires’ various idiocies, but my own late mother once found an iguana in her back yard (in a suburb of Johnstown, PA). No screaming involved; she just called the police, who were a bit skeptical of what she was reporting, but eventually came and took it away.
It’s not all that surprising; people keep iguanas as pets; sometimes they get away.
Evil Economist sums it up better than I did.
You are assuming he can tell an iguana from a groundhog, raccoon or rattlesnake, that’s quite optimistic there.
They’s all good eatin’.
We know he’s a white nationalist, right?
Cuz he’s definitely a white nationalist.
Someone needs to lay off the Tucker Carlson. Oof.
This “cultural identity” of which you speak? Is it Willie Nelson or Justin Bieber? Rachel Maddow or Sean Hannity? Pizza or chimichangas? Kim chee or Tabasco? Hippies or evangelicals? Mormon or Catholics? Coors or beer?
Yes, the right has long been upset about “Press One for English.”
What’s next, websites in more than one language? The horror!
In Wingnut Hell, the recordings all say “para español, oprima numero uno o quédese en la línea. Press 2 for English.”
:eek: :eek: :eek:
That, or an iguana.
In much of Canada we have the phenomenon well described by Dave Barry, to wit: “English and French live side by side and have learned, through centuries of peaceful coexistence on the same land, to hate each other.” Thus in much of the country we are plagued by a button to press if you want the dialog in French (or, heaven forfend, to have to press the button in order to get English) and one can see where all this hate and tension leads. When you lose your cultural identity it leads first to legal abortion, then to gay marriage, and finally to the depravity of legalized mary-hwanna. This can only happen in a society where you have to press a button in order to speak in the proper and decent language that God intended instead of some foreign jabbering that no one understands, or at least, where you have to listen to some jabbering telling the foreigner to press the button to hear more jabbering instead of decent proper English. Decent society cannot withstand that kind of moral corruption, and it falls apart at the seams, or tears at the seams, or some such tailoresque metaphor.
Oh, the humanity! 
You reap what you sew. That’s Scripture!
West Virginia’s dumbest lawyer on Charlottesville…
After many posters, including me, pointed out that this was the Unite the Right rally organized by white supremacists for white supremacists he responds reasonably.
And then immediately doubles down in the next sentence.
“Even though my facts were wrong, my opinion is still right,” is not eating crow you jackass.
Also the other major protests that summer in Charlottesville were also organized by white supremeacists.
Guys, we are all laughing at him now… but what happens if you end up in some kind of “The Producers” type situation in which you absolutely, positively have to wreck your life and end up in jail?
Yeah, you’re going to need a lawyer who will argue that a finger isn’t an object. He’s also the guy you can count on to ask a witness, “So you call them fingers… but have you ever seen them fing?!? I withdraw the question!!”
Sure, you might not ever NEED to be convicted of a crime. But if you do, you’ll come crawling back to him!
I can’t stand the subject of this thread. I find him to be an idiot, a terrible debater, and disingenuous in the extreme. However, I thought he was treated pretty unfairly in that thread. I thought there was an actual interesting question in there (which I posted over there – feel free to call me on it), but the SDMB couldn’t get past his history.
I guess he’s being treated unfairly there because he’s such an asshole elsewhere, but that thread was still a shitshow for no real reason other than that.
In one of the immigration threads of a few weeks ago, the dumbest lawyer in West Virginia scoffed at the idea of interviewing immigrants. He called it a worthless exercise, because they would just lie.
https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=21290160&postcount=150
I still think about this at night and shake my head in amazement. This man claims to have a career in the criminal justice system. A system that is heavily based on interviewing suspects and witnesses and determining their credibility based on their answers.
When he’s in a courtroom, does he think it’s ridiculous to ask questions of the witnesses because they’re just going to lie anyway? Does he think that police questioning is a worthless exercise? Does he not know that police have independent information when they question people? Doesn’t this idiot realize that when they question people applying for asylum that they actually have independent information on the specifics of the terrorism in their home country, and that this information can be used to verify or disprove their stories? No way this guy is a real lawyer. He’s way too dumb. I think that sexual abuser got the lawyer he deserves.