I’m in.
And I like your little twist on my prank. Especially once the chocolate sequestering has been completed.
Step one: Mod a windmill in a windmill park that the mark passes/sees regularly to turn both ways.
Two: Make an innocent remark to the mark about how weird it is that in every row of identical windturbines there is always one that turns the wrong way.
Three: Arrange thing so that the next time he passes the park our special windmill runs the wrong way.
Four: When the mark comments on the weird rogue windmill deny step 2, ridicule the mark for being stupid, some trick of the light/mind, whatever.
Five: remove all evidence of step 3, then have some ‘random’ person repeat step 2 (this should be covertly filmed).
Six: when the mark isn’t sufficiently mindfucked for step five to be satisfactory repeat 5, 3 and 4 until he sought professional psychological help.
There is only one downside: I need a bit more than $1.000.000.
SOUTHAVEN shout out!?! Holy fucking shit dude! where are you???
Where people from Southaven go to work. 
I don’t think I would need a million dollars to do it, but there is something I’ve often longed to do.
Y’know when you go to one of these “fast food” places that isn’t dismally slow? I wish I had a skeleton in my trunk. It wouldn’t have to be real (although I understand you can buy them from science supply places)—it would just have to look real. And it would have be remote-controllable robotics as well: some simple things, like outstretching the arm. But you wouldn’t be able to see the mechanisms, except for some monofilament maybe.
Also, you would need to have your car outfitted so that you can control it remotely.
So when I’ve been sitting in the drive through forever, I jump out, grab the skeleton from the truck, prop him in the driver’s seat and connect him to the robotics. Maybe add some cobwebbing à la Halloween for effect. Then I control everything from remote.
When my turn finally comes, the grunt at the cash register sees this skeleton drive up, the head turns, the arm pops out with money in hand. “Geez, you guys are slow!” comes the voice from the CD player, with the skeleton’s jaw moving. “Can I get some ketchup with those fries?”
Olive Branch? 
One of my favorite places in the world to sit and read, and just enjoy being outdoors is Mt. Hope Cemetery. For those of you who haven’t been to Rochester, NY, it’s a municipal cemetery in the ‘garden’ style, with some absolutely beautiful funerary art: the monuments, the crypts, and even some of the family niches.
What I would do, in one of those family nooks, I would replace one of the original monuments with a manufactured stone monument with a speaker embedded within the matrix. Then bring my mark along for a picnic lunch. And when he takes a look at the monument, the speaker will play a recording of a voice (gender and age appropriate for the data on the monument) saying “Turn me over!” I, of course, would have heard nothing. So the mark looks closer - and hears “For the love of God, turn me over!” There would be some ten or fifteen similar phrases, all expressing a need to be helped. But the only person who could hear them would be the mark.
Obviously, the million would be spent more on getting shills to play along, rather than any particular equipment.
You know, I thought of coming back into the thread to write that.
I’m in the pcity whose mayor, were he not a giant sack of self-rightteous shit, would regularly get down on his knees and thank god for Fred Smith.