Please empty the entire two litre bottle of mayonaise onto my burger. Thankyou.

The BBQ Pit
61

My problem with ordering fried eggs is that I like them over-hard but with solid (i.e., NOT BROKEN) yolks - because I HATE egg yolk (won’t eat 'em), and just flip the darned things to the side. My mother and I seem to be the only two people on the planet who can break an egg into a frying pan WITHOUT BREAKING THE YOLK. And then proceed to let it sit in the pan on the same side until the yolk is relatively firm and then flip it WITHOUT BREAKING THE YOLK.

Why don’t I just order egg whites? Because I never remember to!!

62

Maybe we should switch restaurants. At the ones I go to, they are INCAPABLE of breaking the yolk.:smiley:

63

And I, in my burger-slinging days, would have said “We have [brand name] orange soda, is that all right?” Because to me, orangeade, like lemonade, is not fizzy. And in case anyone is collecting data on this for their doctoral thesis, I’m 33.

64

I always called it “orange drink”. And yes, if it’s carbonated, it’s orange soda. Or “pop”, as those weirdos from the Midwest call it.:wink:

65

So I went to McDonalds earlier today, because I was craving a big mac. I haven’t had one in almost 2 years, since I worked there, and it just sounded good. So I pull up to the speaker and order, real slow, and not getting ahead of the cashier. I order a #1, with extra cheese, and no pickles, with a coke to drink, not supersized. And a chicken fajita. It came up on the screen just as I requested. I sat, and approximately 4 minutes later, the cars in front of me moved so I could pull forward. In another 2 minutes, I was at the window. I had to pay with a $50 bill, because it was the smallest I had. I gave him the 50, and the change, so as to get an even $44 back. He looked. And looked. And looked. To save his life, the kid could not figure out the change for $50-$6. While he was pondering the math, I watched as my order buzzed along on the high tech ceiling track, and past the landing zone, and right onto the floor. He looked at me, in amazement, possibly trying to decide if he should call for a new order, or try to give me this bag that I watched fly onto the ground. He opted for a new order. So, while his fellow coworkers scurried around to recreate my big mac, he went back to the math. He gave me $45. I handed him the $5 back, and told him I should only get $4, because 50-6 is 44. “I’m not very good at math, and the computer only lets me punch in a $20, not a $50.” So I finally get my change, and the new order comes along the track. He’s careful to catch it this time. He hands me the bag, and I drive away, 15 minutes after I originally pulled up to the speaker. I get home, open my sandwich, and discover…no cheese, with extra pickles. I’m too tired to go back, so I pick off the pickles, and eat it cheeseless. I bite into the fajita, and it’s not cooked all the way through. Frustrated, I call the McDonalds, and explain the situation to them.

The manager, while apologetic, informs me I ordered it the way I received. “Ma’am, I’m looking at your receipt. You ordered no cheese, and extra pickles.” “Sir, I assure you I did not. My order appeared on the screen as I requested. I was charged the extra 30 cents for extra cheese. And nowhere in my order did I state ‘And please give me a cold fajita’.” After much delibiration, and the involvement of the cashier, he decided I was right. And, because I was put through this ordeal, I get, on my next visit…a small fry.

That, my friends, is why I will never eat at McDonalds again.

66

In Britain, orangeade means orange fizzy drink and lemonade means lemon fizzy drink. The term soda isn’t used really, except for “soda water” and “cream soda” - and most young folk wouldn’t know what cream soda was. So I’d expect someone over here to know exactly what orangeade was, although the orangeade drinks served in fast food places tend to be ordered by their brand names these days.

67

I just want to point out that it all depends on which McDonalds. A lot of them suck; but the one in my town happens to be great. I always order a Big Mac and fries without salt. They are always happy to grant my special request, and the best part is that not only are the fries not too salty, they are always fresh and hot that way. And I haven’t gotten a bad Big Mac from them yet. It all depends on who’s running the place.

68

I don’t eat at McDonalds. I prefer to eat…food. :wink:

69

Strangely, though they don’t know what orangeade (probably as common a term in the UK as ‘orange-soda’ is in the US) they do know EXACTLY what I mean when I say ‘coke’.

They know I mean ‘pepsi’.

70

You Britons, I’m telling you. You have to have a different word for everything! :smiley:

Incidentally, last night we ate at Burger King. After reading this thread, I was a little nervous about our order. Both flodjunior and fella bilong missus flodnak wanted Whoppers with cheese, but while fbmf wanted all the usual gunk on top, flodjunior, still too young to appreciate the finer things in life, wanted his without onions and pickles. I, on the other hand, wanted a Whopper without cheese, and also without the demon tomato. (Totnak didn’t care what he got to eat as long as it came in the special kiddy-meal bag.) But the counter guy read my order back to me perfectly. The girl who was filling orders double- and triple-checked the receipt. The sandwiches came to the tray with the right markings - and they were hot, and the fries were fresh and the sodas cold. Everything looked set.

But the guys just grabbed a sandwich and unwrapped, and I had to ask them if they’d checked to see who got which burger. They didn’t. After all that, they both had the wrong burger :rolleyes:

71

Yep, they always do, don’t they? Maybe if you ordered a Fanta they’d give you a Tango. Or maybe it’d be another opportunity to use the blank look.

72

I understand that if you want lemonade in Britain as we know it here in the States, you have to ask for “lemon squash”. To me, that sounds like some evil potion made by crossing lemons with a certain gourd vegetable. It’s against the laws of nature, I tell ya!!!

73

So, what you call lemonade isn’t fizzy?

It’s the ‘ade’ part here that implies fizziness.

74

I worked at BK and “light mayo” actually means “easy on the mayo”. Not diet mayo. If someone ordered anything with light mayo, we’d put on a very thin smear as opposed to a huge glop of the stuff. You were just misunderstanding what they meant.

75

‘Colemans Light mayonaise’ It’s diet mayonaise.

76

I think here, “ade” just means juice. Lemonade is essentially sugar + water + lemon juice. Kool-Aid is sugar + water + powdered juice-like substance. Marmalade is, well, I guess it’s marmot juice.

77

I understand they like to put it on their french fries.

This is why they’re next on the list after Syria.

78

Just a little story to give some insight as to the “quality” of the people who work at fast food restaurants…

One summer while I was still a lowly undergraduate, I got a job working at the local McDonalds. Oh what fun. They first started everyone off toasting buns (they’ve since stopped doing that). Once you “mastered” that task, you could move up to frying meat, then on to cooking the fish/chicken, and finally, if they saw you had somewhat of a clue, you might get lucky enough to make the sandwiches.

So I am working late one night as the sandwich maker. :slight_smile: One of the newer employees who I think had rocks for brains is on the other side of the table frying the burgers. It’s kinda slow as it is near closing, but we get a special order for a plain cheeseburger come back. He asked if he could make that one and I was like sure… Can’t mess up a bun, meat, and cheese…

So I walk away for a minute, come back, and look at what he’s doing. There is ketchup and mustard on the bun and he’s reaching for the pickles.

Me: “I think that was a plain cheeseburger.”

Rocks for Brains: “Yeah, that’s what I’m making.”

Ugh. He was quickly put back over frying meat.

79

You’re what is known in the fast food biz as Evil Demonic Monster Customer from the Infernal Pits of Hell, or Fucking Ass-Ratchet for short. If you start to develop unexplained but somehow karmic giant weeping boils all over your body, you’ll know the reason.

80

Well, in that one, the initial question makes more sense; you can interpret it as “Do you want any combination of ketchup or mayo, or neither?”

Not that it’s necessarily what he meant, but that’s how I took it.