I would have been fired on the spot!

The BBQ Pit
1

I went to Rallyburger today and ordered, as I always do, a Rallyburger with ketchup and pickles only. When they handed it to me, I checked it, as I always do, and found dribs of mayonnaise in with the ketchup. Back to the window.

Me: Excuse me, there’s mayonnaise on this. Can I get another one?
Cashier: No, no… (sounding like she’s going to try to convince me that mayonnaise I didn’t ask for isn’t a problem)
Me: I don’t want mayonnaise on this. Can I get another one?
Cashier: :confused:
Me: (to manager) There’s mayonnaise on this, and I asked for pickles and ketchup only. Can I get another one?
Manager: See, the spoon sometimes has mayo—
Me: Can I just get another one?
Manager: We can give it to you with pickles only and you put the ketchup on yourself? See, the ketchup spoon sometimes has mayo on it.
Me: Sure, okay.

They give me the burger with three pickles, and three ketchup packets. I slather on the ketchup, much to my taste, and chomp away.

While I’m holding down the paper so it won’t blow away (see, I’m a conscientious customer!) I realize:

  1. When you fuck up someone’s burger, you don’t give them an explanation of how unsanitary your dress table is, you just say “Sorry” and make a new one.
  2. The ketchup spoon sometimes has mayo on it? What the fuck? That wouldn’t have happened when I worked at McD’s, because all the condiments were applied from task-specific gadgets. Mayo never got anywhere near a burger; it was strictly for chicken sandwiches. And no condiments ever mixed before they were applied; they went from the container to the sandwich. It could have happened at Burger King, where we spread the mayo with a spatula. But if it had, I would have been fired on the spot. You did not allow condiments to touch each other.
  3. I do my job. Other people can bloody well do theirs.

I’ll probably do this from now on; ask for pickles and put the ketchup on myself. Once, through some fluke, I got a burger that had a decent, Carl’s Jr. amount of ketchup. The next time I ordered, I said, “The burger I had last time was soooo good; plenty of ketchup. Can you tell them to put plenty of ketchup on this time too?” I got the usual what’s-that-buzzing-sound look and a drip of ketchup that wouldn’t have fed Woodstock (the bird, not the festival).

But “the ketchup spoon sometimes has mayo on it”? That’s like telling me, “Sorry; all our grill people are hung over”. David Lewandowski (owner of the McD’s where I worked) would kick your ass all the way to the Mojave desert! I’m toying with the idea of reporting this to the people who grade restaurants in LA.

And if you’re wondering why I don’t go somewhere else, Rally’s is the only FF place within walking distance of my work. I usually eat there 2 or 3 days out of 5; on others, I bring my lunch. The product, when it’s dressed properly, is always good; it’s just the service that’s spotty.

2

You, infidel, deserved what you got. Everyone knows the only proper condiment for a hamburger is mustard.

What are you, 6 years old?

3

I highly advise against arguing with minimum-wage fast food drones in places you eat regularly. The quality of your food is solely dependent on their attitude. You’ll be lucky if your future burgers don’t include gobs of spit.

4

How do gobs of spit affect the quality of the food? It seems like they would be akin to herbal essence and not change the taste.

5

Chas. E, I have often thought the same thing. But I wasn’t arguing, I was asking for what I ordered.

And I’m tired of those “words of warning” that always turn up in food service threads. I should not have to accept an inferior product for fear that sending it back will get me a contaminated product. Besides, since I check all my sandwiches before I eat them, I’d notice if my ketchup was adulterated. Then I’d have something to tell the food-service inspectors that would really make them sit up and listen.

6

There are only two places where sweet and salt go well together:

One is a Margarita.

The other is your lovers sweaty body.

7

Ketchup and mayo? Only mustard? You poor, deluded fools. A proper hanburger is mayo and mustard, with a slice of onion. Anything else is a sure sign of poor breeding.

8

Right on Miller, but you forgot the lettuce and tomato!

9

Philistines.

A HOT DOG should be slathered in mustard and not ketchup, plus either onions or sauerkraut (but not both.) A HAMBURGER, however, should have both mustard AND ketchup, plus onions, lettuce, and tomato. Pickles are optional.

Mayonnaise does not belong on a hamburger OR a hot dog, and anyone who says it does is either a communist or a child molester.

Only a person of extraordinarily low character and poor taste would dare to suggest that a hamburger should be dressed in the same manner as a hot dog. Hamburgers and hot dogs are completely unique delicacies and must be done differently.

10

It’s my damn hamburger and I’m paying for it.

The point is, I’m still amazed that this “manager” admitted to me that the grill crew is so sloppy. When I wore the paper hat, it was drilled in to me that the customers do not want to hear your problems and they do not want to hear excuses. They just want their damn food.

11

Amen, brother!

12

That’s “Amen, Sister.” :slight_smile:

13

You poor tasteless souls. Mustard is for hot dogs, brats, corned beef and pretzels but has no place on a hamburger. Mayo is the only condiment for a burger, and maybe a dash of barbecue sauce. Ketchup has no place in the world. None!

14

It’s not as if Rilchiam went in there and started screaming, “HOW DARE YOU PUT MAYO ON MY SANDWHICH YOU STUPID FUCKWIT!”

No, she(?) simply said, “This isn’t what I ordered, could I have another one?” Sheesh, people.

What if she were allergic to mayonaise? Seriously, accidents do happen occassionally, but the staff shouldn’t have been so rude about it.

15

Thank you, Guin! Being sanitary and accurate are not optional.

16

I think that’s pretty much a given…

17

I dunno, Rilchiam. I don’t see any admirable people in this story, only assholes.

18

A proper burger has about 2 packets worth of ketchup and mustard applied to the bottom bun. The top bun must be slathered with about 5 tablespoons of mayo. Between the mayo and the meat is where the 6 pickle slices (or pickle relish), 1 tomato slice, 2 pieces of lettuce, fried or raw onion, and two partially melted slices of medium cheddar cheese go.

Acceptable variations include 1000 Island dressing instead of mayo, and putting the pickles down below with the mustard & Ketchup.

19

No, a proper burger should have a toasted bun, bacon, some lettuce, a couple of those purple onion slices, and be severed so you can put whatever damn comndiment you want on it with a side of real french fries.
Fuck this, I’m gonna go get a Rueben sandwich.
On toasted whole wheat bread, heated, and light on the sauerkraut. Washed down with a bottle of cream soda and a bag of steak and onion potato chips.
Or maybe I’ll just go get some black coffee from a vending machine. Is it wrong to like vending machine coffee more than Starbucks? I think not.

20

[PETA]

Well, if you wouldn’t base your diet on the merciless slaughter of the innocents, you wouldn’t have to worry about this!

Every day for lunch I have a small organic salad, a soyburger (and I think we agree that free-range paprika is the ONLY appropriate condiment for a nice soyburger) and a wheat-grass juice shake.

No one is murdered for my lunch, I have cast hate and negativity out of my aura, and that makes me better than you!

MEAT IS MURDER!

[/PETA]