Please, explain partying to me. I don't get it.

It is mardi gras in the netherlands, and so many of my town folk are looking forward to three days of partying. Now, the fun in dressing up in crazy colorful threatrical costumes, that I do get. Getting creative about a costume and an " act" and enjoying other’s costumes, that is fun. You guys do it in the US with Halloween, we do it on Mardi Gras.

But drinking, and going from bar to bar? Going into a crowded bar, shouting hey-are-you-here-too, at people you vaguely know? Drinking some more, having unintelligible conversations because the music is too loud? Dancing in a packed crowd and a packed bar? What is the fun in that?

Seriously. Partying is considered a vice, a sin, right? So it is supposed to be tempting? But you’d have to pay me a LOT of money to go partying.

Can anyone tell me what is the fun? Are there any Dopers who didn’t like partying and aquired a taste for it? Can you tell me how?

I certainly have done my share of partying. What’s not to like about going out with friends, drinking to excess*, and having fun?
*A long time ago I learned to pace myself so I don’t end up making a total fool of myself. Like waking up in a strange house with my pants around my ankles, for example.

Surprising question. Partying in the way you have described has never been my thing, but going out and spending communal time with groups of acquaintances, strangers, and close friends in the hopes of having a good time (for whatever your definition of a good time is) has been going on for, as far as I can tell, most of human history.

Many many people like spending time with other people.

Specifically bar culture is designed to facilitate casual sex. You can’t see each other that well, you can’t really talk to each other, you are both usually wasted so you bone (or tease or flirt or dance or whatever your personal comfort level is). Again, never been my thing, but I get it.

It can also be fun to go bar hoping with friends. This is different and is usually a search for an adventure or good stories. You get enough people and substances together and you can usually find said adventure on a bar hop.

Leaffan: Does it make it better if your pants were missing completely?

On topic: I’m not a partier and even I see the appeal, you’re with your friends in a high energy environment, alcohol isn’t required but it does “loosen you up” to be more receptive to the environment.

If you’re single, you might get laid.

If you’re not single, you can still drink yourself silly. Nothing better than having a bunch of company while doing so! And you might meet some new friends.

Oh, and it helps to have some “party favors”, or so I’ve heard…

I get to party in Tokyo next weekend and I cant wait.

There’s also a downside.

I never bothered with the drinking thing, and still don’t, but I loved going to parties as a teen and young adult and dancing until the wee hours of the morning. It kept me fit, too. It’s one of the few things I regret with my current SO - he is so anti-parties it’s crazy, and I understand that, but I miss going to them.

I don’t like bars though and never go. These are more family friendly functions I was at. Drunk people are weird and scary. On the other hand, I see no point in dinner parties or going over to someone’s house just to sit and stare together at the TV. I can do that at home!

That’s not excess. Excess is waking up in your house, with someone else’s pants around your ankles.

this is slightly a hijack since it doesn’t answer your question, but it is a statement of solidarity. I don’t get it either. I like being with people. Shouting at people I don’t like.

I think it’s an extrovert thing.

Back home we like to party, use any excuse to do it, and do not consider it a sin or wrong. Birthday, anniversary, engagement, family member leaving or getting back to town, wedding, baptism, pregnancy, …any excuse will often start a party where other family and friends will hear of it- and show up to join in. Most in my family get excited about company, and like to dance, so it will usually involve dancing and music, but also we like to eat and cook, so plenty of that gets thrown in, also taking pictures, sharing stories, singing, and although I do not drink, I am sure that some do.
While growing up, I often saw parties break out spontaneously in the kitchen. I miss home now just thinking about it.

Umm, no.

I don’t really like being around drunk people, but I understand the urge to chemically alter one’s mood, and I guess that makes other drunk people more tolerable too.

What I don’t get is the dirty, sticky, smoky, crowded, hot, loud bars and dance clubs with darkened or strobe lighting. Every one of those things makes me want to run away screaming. If I find myself in such situations, I have to fight the urge to close my eyes and cover my ears, and often enough the urge wins. It’s hell on earth to me.

I’d just as soon not ever wear ANY costume. To me, that’s just silly. Partying to the extend of overindulging is pretty useless. Watching beautiful women representing, that’s a good thing.

This may be an example of the extrovert/introvert divide. To the extrovert (or at least someone with an extroverted side), being around lots of people, lots of stimulation, crowds, loud music, etc. is inherently exciting, invigorating, and fun. To the introvert, it’s inherently tiring, overstimulating, and/or boring.

I’m a super introvert, and to do it sober sounds like torture. But when drinking it’s fun, and I used to do it a lot. It was a way to relax and release stress that had been building up all week. I also met a lot of people, and I’m not normally the meeting-a-lot-of-people type.

I don’t like partying at all. I can’t hear myself think. You can’t get to know anyone. I hate bars. I always end up being the one driving someone else’s drunk ass home.

I swear sometimes people post things for the Look How Socially Clueless I Am cred. If you don’t understand the appeal that drinking, dancing and socializing has for some people, even if it holds no appeal for you personally, there’s nothing anyone can type here to make you get it,

I never could get used to “party” as a verb. “Celebrating” is too clunky, I suppose.
At any rate, partying is a perfectly natural pastime. Clubbing, however, is an abomination.

Your username is Maastricht, presumably you live there. And you don’t like carnaval?

This weekend it must suck to be you.

Greetings from Holland (blissfully carnaval-free)


Disclaimer: I like to party as much as the next guy, but carnaval in the south of the Netherlands is a bit of an acquired taste.