Polls only: No discussion

Kevin Smith movies. You may select up to three.

  • Clerks
  • Mallrats
  • Chasing Amy
  • Dogma
  • Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
  • Jersey Girl
  • Clerks II
  • Zack and Miri Make a Porno
  • Cop Out
  • Red State
  • Jay & Silent Bob’s Super Groovy Cartoon Movie!
  • Tusk
  • Yoga Hosers
  • Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
  • KillRoy Was Here
  • Clerks III
  • Catch and Release
  • none of the above
0 voters
WILL Smith movies-max FIVE choices in this go-around
  • Bad Boys
  • Independence Day
  • Men in Black
  • Enemy of the State
  • Wild Wild West
  • The Legend of Bagger Vance
  • Ali
  • Showtime
  • Men in Black II
  • Bad Boys II
  • I, Robot
  • Hitch
  • The Pursuit of Happyness
  • I Am Legend
  • Hancock
  • Seven Pounds
  • Men in Black 3
  • After Earth
  • Focus
  • Concussion
  • Suicide Squad
  • Collateral Beauty
  • Bright
  • Aladdin
  • Gemini Man
  • Bad Boys for Life
  • King Richard
  • Emancipation
  • Something I didn’t list
  • NONE of the above
0 voters

Which of these reality-type television shows do you like?

  • 90 Day Fiancé
  • Alaskan Bush People
  • Alone
  • America’s Got Talent
  • America’s Next Top Model
  • American Idol
  • American Pickers
  • Bar Rescue
  • Barnwood Builders
  • Below Deck Adventure
  • Big Brother
  • Crikey! It’s the Irwins
  • Dancing with the Stars
  • Deadliest Catch
  • Homestead Rescue
  • Jersey Shore
  • Life Below Zero
  • Lip Sync Battle
  • Love Island
  • Maine Cabin Masters
  • MasterChef
  • MasterChef Junior
  • My 600-lb Life
  • My Big Fat Fabulous Life
  • Naked and Afraid
  • Next Level Chef
  • Pawn Stars
  • Penn & Teller: Fool Us
  • Pit Bulls & Parolees
  • Project Runway
  • Running Wild with Bear Grylls
  • RuPaul’s Drag Race
  • Shark Tank
  • Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test
  • Supernanny
  • Survivor
  • Teen Mom
  • The Amazing Race
  • The Bachelor
  • The Great British Bake Off
  • The Kardashians
  • The Masked Singer
  • The Real Housewives of (X)
  • The Voice
  • Top Chef
  • Undercover Billionaire
  • Vanderpump Rules
  • Worst Cooks in America
  • Some other show / I don’t watch TV / 57 channels and nothin’ on
  • Good lord, Mustard, none of them!
0 voters
What would you prefer?
  • A large but finite number of fast, “smart” zombies (they run and they retain a limited intelligence, e.g. they still know how things like doors and elevators work, they’ll push a button if they encounter one, they can follow very basic logic, they might even be able to spot and avoid a trap, etc.).
  • An essentially endless number of slow, shambling, “dumb” zombies (they’re very slow, and follow just the most basic instinct to hunt and feed, on human brains of course; a doorknob will completely perplex them, but their sheer numbers mean they can eventually overwhelm almost any defense).
  • I’m 100% certain I’m almost instantly Zombie Chow either way.
0 voters

Which name do you prefer?

  • Courgette
  • Zucchini
0 voters
  • Aubergine
  • Eggplant
0 voters
  • Mangetout
  • Snow peas
0 voters
  • Arugula
  • Rocket
0 voters
  • Rutabaga
  • Swede
0 voters
  • Scallion
  • Spring onion
0 voters
  • Beets
  • Beetroot
0 voters

Which do you like more?

  • Your favorite sports team playing in its dark uniform
  • Your favorite sports team playing in its light uniform
  • Neither/other answer
0 voters

Your favorite hot dog brand, any variety.

  • Hebrew National
  • Nathan’s
  • Kayem
  • Ball Park
  • Oscar Mayer
  • Trader Joe’s
  • Costco Kirkland
  • Sabrett
  • Pearl
  • Hofmann
  • Hillshire Farm
  • Stock Yards
  • Best’s
  • KC Cattle Company
  • Applegate
  • Beyond Meat
  • Upton’s Naturals
  • Rastelli’s
  • 365 Everyday
  • Diestal
  • Lightlife
  • Other
0 voters

Which would you rather eat? Part II: Weird Al edition (Just Eat It).

  • My Bologna
  • Spam
  • Lasagna
  • I Love Rocky Road
  • The White Stuff [from an Oreo]
  • Taco Grande
  • The Rye or the Kaiser
  • Grapefruit Diet
  • Addicted to Spuds
0 voters
Meats I have eaten:
  • Alligator
  • Bear
  • Beef
  • Bison
  • Boar
  • Camel
  • Chicken
  • Crab
  • Crocodile
  • Duck
  • Eel
  • Elk
  • Escargot
  • Fish
  • Frog
  • Game birds (partridge, pheasant, pigeon, quail, guinea fowl, others)
  • Goat
  • Goose
  • Horse
  • Insects/spiders/larva (crickets, tarantula, ants, grubs, etc.)
  • Jellyfish
  • Kangaroo
  • Lamb
  • Lobster
  • Ostrich
  • Other rodents (rat, guinea pig, squirrel, etc.)
  • Other shellfish (clams, oysters, scallops, mussels, etc.)
  • Pork
  • Rabbit
  • Shrimp
  • Snake
  • Turkey
  • Turtle
  • Venison
  • Something else not listed above
  • I have never eaten any of these things
0 voters
I have tried some of the modern plant-based alternative “meats” and I…
  • liked most of them.
  • liked some of them.
  • liked some of them, but not enough to buy it over the real thing if given the choice.
  • liked a few of them, but hated all the rest.
  • really didn’t care for most or all of them, but I’d eat them if that was all there was.
  • really hated most or all of them, and I would just go hungry if that was all there was.
0 voters

If you’re one of the people who has never eaten pork, which of the following best explains why:

  • Eating pork is against my religion
  • Eating meat is against my religion
  • I’m a vegetarian and pork is meat
  • I’m a pescatarian and pigs aren’t fish
  • I’m a breatharian and pigs aren’t air
  • I’m allergic to pork
  • Somebody else is in charge of my diet
  • I read Charlotte’s Web at an impressionable age
  • A pig saved my life once
  • I worry about being on the list when the pigs rise up and take over
  • I ain’t eat nothin’ that ain’t got sense enough to disregard its own feces
  • I am a pig and it would be cannibalism
  • I really hate cows and have dedicated my life to eating beef
  • I want to avoid the risk of trichinosis
  • Other reason
0 voters

Today is Sunday. Will you be eating any bacon today?

  • Yes
  • No
0 voters

Your neighbours George Mouse and Sarah Mouse have a son named David Mouse.

Collectively are they

  • The Mouses
  • The Mice
0 voters

How about that pointing device on your desk? If you have a computer mouse and then you buy another one, you have

  • two mouses.
  • two mice.
0 voters

And if you have a Sony Walkman and then you buy another one (from an antiques store I suppose), you have

  • two Walkmans.
  • two Walkmen.
0 voters

Your next door neighbor is a low-life. His brother is also a low-life. When his brother moves in with him, you are living next door to

  • two low-lifes.
  • two low-lives.
0 voters

An archeologist discovers the fossil of a sabertooth cat. On further digging she finds that there are two of them. She has found

  • two sabertooths.
  • two saberteeth.
0 voters
The Men in Black are recruiting and they want YOU. You will be privy to knowledge and technology beyond your wildest imagination. In exchange you will be erased from all memory; no one will ever know you exist, anywhere.
  • I’m in. Erase me!
  • If I can get a few months to settle up a few things, I’m in.
  • No thanks. Flashy-thing me!
  • No thanks. Flashy-thing me, but if you don’t mind can you make me think I was just on some fantastic vacation or something?
0 voters

If you’re one of the people who HAS eaten horse, which of the following best explains why:

  • I was tricked!
  • I had the opportunity and wanted to see what it was like.
  • Horse is a standard dish of my people.
  • Horse is a standard dish of the people in a place where I traveled, and I wanted to participate in their customs.
  • I hate horses! Eating them puts them in their place!
0 voters
  • wired mouse
  • wireless mouse
  • trackball
  • multi-touch trackpad
  • touch screen
  • old-school screen/light-pen interface
  • new-fangled eyeball cursor tracking
  • pencil and paper
  • direct brain interface (as soon as they perfect it)
  • AI-curated direct brain interface
  • mrrgggh – roasted gazelle haunch
0 voters

How many problems in your life right now would be fixed by a huge influx of money?

  • All of them
  • Most of them
  • Some of them
  • None of them
0 voters

(Inspired by something someone posted on Facebook recently, touting Baby Shark vs Staying Alive as the song rhythm of choice): Have you ever performed CPR (on a real person, not a CPR dummy)?

  • Yes, and it revived the person
  • Yes, but it was not successful
  • No
0 voters

How do you like your burger?

How do you like your patty? (The star of the show):
  • 100% Ground beef
  • Ground beef with some add ins (a la a recipe from a cookbook)
  • Beyond burger
  • Grain patty (eg Morningstar Farms)
0 voters
How do you like it cooked?
  • Rare (Cool red center)
  • Medium rare (Warm red center)
  • Medium (Warm pink center)
  • Medium Well (Slightly pink center)
  • Well (No pink)
0 voters
Cheese?
  • American (White or Yellow)
  • Cheddar
  • Swiss (includes Baby Swiss)
  • Monterey Jack
  • Pepper Jack
  • Mozzarella
  • Provolone
  • Other
  • None
0 voters
Bun?
  • Toasted
  • Non-toasted
  • Griddle fried
  • Sesame seeds
  • Potato bun
  • Lettuce wrap
  • Anaconda Proof (It won’t want non, unless it’s got buns, hon!)
  • Some other option
0 voters
Condiments
  • Ketchup (Catsup)
  • Yellow mustard
  • Spicy Brown Mustard
  • Dijon Mustard
  • Mayo
  • Sweet Relish
  • Dill Relish
  • Barbeque Sauce
  • Brown Sauce (A-1, HP, Heinz 57)
  • Other
  • None
0 voters
Toppings
  • Raw Onion (Red, White, or Yellow)
  • Sautéed Onions
  • Fried Onions (Onion rings, French’s)
  • Lettuce
  • Tomato
  • Pickles
  • Raw Mushrooms
  • Sautéed Mushrooms
  • Other
  • None
0 voters
On the Side?
  • Fries
  • Onion Rings
  • Baked Beans
  • Salad
  • Other
  • None
0 voters