I am asking whether pornography can satisfy an already existing desire or whether it instead increases it.
Well, I’d say that you shouldn’t assume the two are mutually exclusive. For example, I could easily start eating ice cream again after a year’s hiatus because, damnit, I some Cherry Garcia would really be good right now. But then I might remember that positive experience and make ice cream a semi-regular part of my diet.
Anyway, to answer your question in specific. Ironically, I find porn satisfying only in the short term. There are times when I’m just horny and want to get off. And so I go on the net and surf around until I find something that I like, masturbate, and be done with it. (Hopefully that brief
summation is not TMI. ;])
It’s definitely pleasurable in the moment, but ultimately I’ve found it’s a lot less satisfying than the real thing. Or maybe I just believe that because porn is so easy to get and the real thing has been a rare occurance in my life. In any event, I still find myself wishing I had a girlfriend. The computer has proven to be a poor substitute. Again, maybe this is just because the easy availability of porn has made me realize that there are other things I’m missing. I can’t go hiking or motorcycle riding with my computer. I can’t have an interesting conversation with my computer. I can’t come home to my computer after a hard day at the office and wrap my arms around it, inhale its perfume, and nuzzle its neck. Um… yeah. What was I talking about? Oh yeah - like I said, I still find myself wishing for a girlfriend. ;]
Now, I do find that I tend to go on porn binges. I’ll go dry for several months, and then at some point I’ll dig up a good website with lots of free, ah, “content” and use it for a week. Then get tired of it since I’ve seen it all, and go back to nothing for a while. I don’t know if this is because I have a hard time finding porn I really enjoy or if it’s a cyclical thing based on my internal lust level - i.e., if I had access to free porn all the time, would I use it? I dunno. I think it would all get old after a while and I’d quit. I do find that the same porn is rarely good for more than a couple sessions. Dunno if that’s a male thing or what. Strangely enough, I do find myself using porn to masturbate more often when I’m infatuated/attracted to a woman IRL. Draw what conclusions from that you like.
In any event, I guess my answer to you is, speaking only for myself, porn satisfies me in the short term, but not in the long term. I seem to use it as a blow-off valve to vent the lust that occurs either periodically or because I’m falling for someone. But in the long term it basically bores me and I forget about it and do other things. And then
the whole cycle starts again.
-Ben
I’m a firm believer that people select the media that expresses what is inside them already. The media may slightly tweak or tune a person after many years of exposure, but in the end it really is the person who determines the media, not the media determining the person.
Be that media books, be that media movies, be that media porn… it’s only appealing to a person because of what they are already like. If someone is, say, a would-be rapist, they will naturally seek and acquire porn that contains, say, violence towards women.
So I think it’s true that evil, bad people generally are attracted to ugly, violent porn. But the porn didn’t make them the way they are. It’s just the indicator of what’s already inside them.
There was a rather interesting article in Salon recently: http://www.salon.com/books/int/2001/07/27/killers/index.html It’s about murderers, not rapists, but the
opinions offered as to why a few people are murderers, while most of us are not, are interesting.
For me, porn and real-world sex serve different, albeit similar, purposes. Porn is at least partly a form of self-love, it certainly entails self-gratification. Real-world lovemaking involves a large element of intensely close communication of love. Like any intense communication, lovemaking involves the attainment of a unique consciousness with another human being.
Masturbation, for me, involves intense, selfish, personal pleasure. I am limited only by the bounds of my imagination in regard to the purely sexual pleasure I can attain via this self-love. Masturbation is great fun, it brings me tremendous pleasure, and it is a unique pleasurable expreience. For me, it isn’t a substitute for intercourse, it is an entirely separate and unique experience.
That said, if I am particularly horny and gratification via intercourse isn’t an option, masturbation usually does the trick. In that sense, masturbation renders me less likely to engage in intercourse in the near-term.
2 superthings about porn. Many think it is just the suckin,fuckin, anal fucking…and so on. But there is so much more. Look at the plots. A pizza delivery. A plumber coming to fix clogged pipes. ANY situation in life can lead to a poke.
When they get it on, the good ones can put on a show. They poke from behind, on the front, on the kitchen table. The men are masters with their schlongs slappin faces. And of course, the pullout just in time to spew over her belly, chest, and face. And of course, the moans and groans editen into the video.
The girls are often gymnastic, squirmy, and do a dozen body-twisting kama-sutra moves.
Hairy, that’s interesting. I’ve never considered self-stimulation any more selfish than the sex act itself. Unless… are you turning yourself on? :eek: Narcissist!
Road Rash, having had sex like that quite a few times, I can say that–for myself–such means are more diversionarily pleasuring, and that I still had “normal” sex more often, and it was just as enjoyable.
<<I am asking whether pornography can satisfy an already existing desire or whether it instead increases it. >>
The one time I actually did have a partner who was willing to tie a bandana around my head to gag me, I spent most of the encounter having an allergic reaction to something and practically choking on post-nasal drip. It’s still a lot of fun to fantasize about the whole idea, but the encounter is much more amusing when it’s happening to someone else on film, a website, or in print, where I don’t have to worry about them drowning in their own snot. Personally, a good solitary encounter with that type of fantasy is all I really want, ever.
The only differences I see between pornography and “real sex” are the quality of the physical release involved and the fact that one is less certain of whether real sex is going to happen or not at any given time. I’m not sure if those two are related. Isn’t part of the physical rush of illicit or complicated sex (I mean the kind with a box of supplies and the cat locked in the bathroom for the duration) the buildup of planning it out and the feeling of accomplishment the planners get from carrying it through? What if pornography provided that, as well as the impetus for direct physical release? Would that affect whether someone would choose to sate most or all of their needs with pornography, especially when obliging those desires otherwise would result in legal, ethical, or situational trouble?
Road Rash, having had sex like that quite a few times, I can say that–for myself–such means are more diversionarily pleasuring, and that I still had “normal” sex more often, and it was just as enjoyable.
I agree. Good for a chang of pace. But have you seen porn and think, “I would like to try that.” Personally, I am into the out-of-breath, slap and tickle, squirm around variety. unless it’s a quickie, or morning wood reliever(Very satisfying!). Quicker than clicking and dragging.
Not to hijack any further, another cool thing about porn is the cheesy funk sooundtrack. Often done on a “Casio” keyboard.
It’s not so much the fucking, which gets old really quickly, but the “diversionarily pleasuring” aspect that make it entertaining.
As an example, back in the 80’s there was one called “Let me tell you about Black Chicks”. It had an original theme. The first scene was a black chick telling about her experience baby-sitting. It then shows some white stud with a bonnett, pacifier, and diaper. I saw it at a New Years party about 10 years ago. I could not stop laughing my ass off for a while. It was a Dark Bro’s production. I believe one of them has gone onto music videos and such.
“Yes, could you please send an ambulance over? I seem to have my… er, that is, something is caught in the disk drive. What? Call Tech Support?”
Sorry, ModernRonin2, I’m really not making fun… I have been there, and if I’d had a computer when I was single, it would have saved me so damn much money on glossy magazines.
“Baby, let me touch your SCSI slot…” [sub]Sorry! Sorry…[/sub]
This does have me thinking of something [sub]other than tasteless jokes[/sub] - I actually believe I’m the opposite of this. My sexual experiences have altered my tastes in porn.
The only example I’ll give here is that years ago I had no interest in pornographic depictions of fellatio. Then I had that glorious first experience of it and I suddenly understood what all the fuss was about. My subsequent viewings of porn included appreciating images of it. This has been my experience each time I’ve… ah, had my horizons broadened.
Does this avenue seem the more likely? Anyone else have porn and real life juxtapose this way?
[sub]Still can’t really get into the “threesome” scenes, though. Hmmm… Hey, honey…?[/sub]
