Potato found growing inside woman after being used as a contraceptive. WTF?

Well, this is different. How about it Doper Girls?

Well, she didn’t get pregnant, right?

If Mrs. Potato Head decides she wants a divorce over this, sorting out who gets which half of the accessories will be a drawn out affair.

About ten years ago I heard about a woman who went to the emergency room complaining of “green vines” growing “down there.” At first the staff was confused. Did she mean “green veins?” Nope. Turned out the woman stuck a potato in there to keep her uterus from sagging and then forgot it was there until it sprouted and made its presence known.

Whad’ya think? Russet? Sweet? Fingerling?

Well, not with a human child, anyway.

Ladies in the know insist on Yukon Gold.

Nope.

My favorite lines on this so far:
“At least she knows she’s fertile.”

“Her mom heard that her daughter was getting plowed and misunderstood.”

“We need better sex ed programs. This is what happens when ignorance takes root.”

“Good thing they removed it when they did, or she would have eventually given birth to a creature which is half human and half potato.”

“She’s having Tater Tots.”

I’m surprised the doctors aren’t being sued for contradicting the mother on birth control. Oh yeah, it’s not America.

:smack:

Please, don’t give the 6th Ave Marketing folks ideas. We’re so close to Halloween that I could almost hear it:

[TheMostInterestingManInTheWorld] “I don’t always drink flavored vodka, but when I do…” [/TheMostInterestingManInTheWorld]

:smack: :smack: :smack:

I’ve put eyes on a few, but this is ridiculous.

Maybe I’m missing something, but it doesn’t look like Snopes has investigated it, they’re just reporting it in their weird news portion.

I shudder to think what flavor you have in mind.

That’s what happens when you get your contraceptives from Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle.

So in a pinch, could you just place an extra order French fries if you’re at MacDonald’s and it looks like you’re going to get lucky?

One of the nurses I worked with years ago had a similar story from her days working in a public health clinic. Only it was a sweet potato.

At least it started out that way.

I call BS because whenever I leave a potato in a humid, dark place* for a while it
rots.

*I am talking about in a pantRy and I know they are not supposed to be humid but this is Florida and everything is humid all the time.

Dear G-d.