I got on their mailing list at 15!
Which begs the question - can one be retired before they start working?
Trust Fund Babies.
I recall hearing (on the SMDB, I think) that the AARP spam really cranks up if you join them.
As I recall, my wife and I each got an invite when we turned 50, which we trashed. And that was it.
We joined a couple of years ago. The biggest spam from “them” so far isn’t directly from them, it’s from insurance and financial companies which are affiliated with them, and get access to their mailing list.
The only thing I get in the mail that’s directly from AARP is a monthly magazine.
They don’t retire young, they never worked a day in their life. Isn’t that different?
Probably. Can one “retire” if one never “tired” in the first place?
As a claustrophobe, I have no interest in the odd chance of being buried alive. I’d rather be burned alive.
I think most of the “privileges” one receives are when they hit 65, because that’s typically when the stress of the workplace ceases and they can finally relax!
The guys who work on customer’s cars for Goodyear retire everyday but still come back in to work the next day.
Retire at 65? Hell, I could afford to retire right now if I wanted to. One just needs to not outlive their nest egg.
Lesse, if I retire this afternoon I’m good until ::Checks 401(k):: …Tuesday, before lunch. 
I appreciate AARP. They lobby, they give me discounts, and the newsletter frequently has sone useful pieces. I only get spam from The Hartford insurance/AARP.
To what extent, though, are the members of AARP their customers, or just a massive mailing list they can monetize by selling to companies like UnitedHealthcare (which sells the AARP-branded Medicare Advantage plans)? It might be that their members are better off without any Advantage plan, instead signing onto traditional Medicare. Is the advice they provide unbiased by the business relationship they have?
Almost certainly not, which is why their life insurance / Medicare / wireless offers go straight to recycling. Granted, I’m quite satisfied with my current providers of those services; even if I were shopping in those areas, I’d seek better advice (probably from the Dope).
The year I turned 50, I was taking some books to a store to sell (back when books were worth selling). I had the back of the minivan open and had picked up the box. A “young” guy (maybe 30) walking by offered to carry the box. My first thought was not to snarl at him, but to think, “I must look enough older that this isn’t insulting”. I mean, if we were both about 30 he’d NEVER offer that, because it would imply that I’m somehow incapable.
I ultimately thanked him but asked him to close the hatch for me.
So…at least in my case, hitting 50 meant I started to get Old Guy treatment!
Your phobia is taphophobia.
Fortunately, there are safety coffins designed to allay such fears, the most primitive being one that incorporates a bell that the awakened “corpse” can ring to alert cemetery workers or passersby (this assumes that one wouldn’t be buried in a far corner of the cemetery where there’d be no one around to pay attention to frantic underground bell ringing).
“You hear something…like a bell?”
“Nah. Or it could be one of them ice cream trucks.”
See: E. A. Poe, “Premature Burial” (1844). Terrified me as a child.
I get less junk mail from AARP than I do from Optum, which bought a medical practice where I no longer even have any doctors.
There’s an episode of The Alfred Hitchcock Hour that creeped me out. A notorious criminal hatches a plan to break out of prison. He convinces the prison doctor to declare him deceased, and have him buried in a cemetery outside the prison grounds, then dig him up again later that night in return for a buncha money. The first part of the plan is carried out, but later in the day the doctor – who hasn’t been feeling well – drops dead of a heart attack!
IIRC sometime in the latter 1800s there was a phobia mania about being buried alive. Suddenly everyone was scared of this possibility really occurring… to them.
Eventually the fear fad died out. Or at least receded back to whatever background level.
The fear is still there. It just went underground.
ISWYDT
Turning 50 wasn’t that big a deal (just the usual solicitations from AARP), but turning 60 and 70 were huge. At 60, I could marry my fiancee and go on her “very inexpensive, but ridiculously comprehensive, retired state employee union health plan” for peanuts a month ($26, I believe). We were married the day after my 60th birthday. And 70 was full (maximum) SS benefits. These were the two most highly-anticipated birthdays of my life.
I was able to get a rail card that gives me 20% off of all train journeys in my area. It costs £25 but given the cost of rail travel in the UK it pays for itself really quickly.