Proper English

I was cleaning old files at home today and I found a photocopy of this exchange in a file more than twenty years old. This is Mindless Pointless Stuff I Must Share:

"A Declaration of Love at First Sight

Dear Miss Logan: Although I have been in your society but once, the impression you have made upon me is so deep and powerful that I cannot forbear writing to you, in defiance of all rules of etiquette.
Affection is sometimes of slow growth; but sometimes it springs up in a moment. In half an hour after I was introduced to you my heart was no longer my own. I have not the assurance to suppose that I have been fortunate enough to create any interest in yours; but will you allow me to cultivate your acquaintance in the hope of being able to win your regard in the course of time? Petitioning for a few lines in reply, I remain, dear Miss Logan, yours devotedly, W___P___.

An Unfavourable Reply

Sir: Your note has surprised me. Considering that you were, until last evening, an entire stranger to me, and that the few words which passed between us were on common-place subjects, it might be called impertinent. But I endeavour to view it in a more favourable light, and am willing to attribute your extraordinary and sudden profusions of devotion to ignorance of the usages of society. You will oblige me by not repeating the absurdity, and I think it best that this note should close the correspondence and our acquaintance. By attending to this request, you will oblige, your obedient servant, Susan L__."

Point taken (I think).

“Proper” is right! Aaaah, the good old days.

Reminds me the correspondence and conversation in “Alias, Grace” by Margaret Atwood.

How did anyone get in anyone else’s pants back then?

Shot down, yet with such civility.

I hope he didn’t give up, Rather…

Dear Miss Logan: I implore your indulgence in granting me pardon for an altogether unpardonable breach of the standards of polite society. Alas, 'twas my heart and not my hand that took up the plume–unguided by reason nor decorum. With this note you will find attached one hundred red roses as my apology for my boorish imposition into your affairs. My chauffeur will await your behest for one half hour, whether it be dismissal, or, if you deign to do so, to carry any missive you may wish to impress upon him to bring to me. I pray your forgiveness and ask that you’d consider me not as a lout (of which I’ve provided more than ample evidence), but rather as one who has had but a momentary, paradisial glimpse of that which might be. I remain, dear Miss Logan, yours, W____P____.


What do you think she’d say in return, if anything?

Sir, kindly rearrange the following words: “off” and **"fck"**.*