If you want to tell a less corny joke, I’m all ears.
Teacher: Jubal, what did you have for breakfast this morning?
Jubal: I 'et six eggs.
Teacher: You mean “ate”?
Jubal: Might have been eight I 'et.
Shucks, I thought this was the random silkiness thread. I can get downright cornographic.
Say what? You mean this isn’t the random silverware thread?
Oh wow! Yuri Geller went a little overboard there, didn’t he…
Dude, it’s like, the fascists who run this system that truly know what’s going on. They know how this system runs and how things go down. Do you wanna know why they cover up the UFO encounters? 'Cause they’re not really alien space ships - they’re government weapons being tested. That’s the reason for the flashing lights, the crashing noises in Area 51 and the men in black suits and sunglasses. It’s all government inside jobs. They may not be aliens, but they are** watching us. Beware. 
That is not random silverware, those are obviously rotor blade assemblies for high-tech sporkopters, the new automated wait-staff replacement drones.
If Richard Dreyfus had owned a sporkopter he would’ve been able to make a big mashed potato mountain that people understood.
I like smashed potatoes.
A potato mâché mountain?
With lots of Elmer’s gravy?
I like lumpy mashed po-tah-toes.
Are those po-tah-to people? They look like San Jacinto River rats.
They used to play some kick-ass ZZ Top covers.
The logo is for Intourist, a travel agency specializing in travel packages and tours – If it’s Tuesday, this must be Екатеринбург.
Suzanne Pleshette was so hoooooooot in that movie!
I have a titanium spork; I use it for lunches. Suzanne Pleshette was no Jaclyn Smith though. Yowsa!
Jaclyn Smith was chopped liver next to Kate Jackson. That voice was freaking awesome (and Suzanne Pleshette has a similar pleasingly rough quality to her voice).
A pox on you and your girl next door! Jan Smithers FTW! Although, SP’s voice was definitely sexy.